Beautiful Journey

Very HOPEFUL News!!!

2010-11-23T14:02:00.000-08:00

Have you been praying???

Because it seems that God is at work in Ukraine. We just got some great news that sounds very positive regarding adoptions remaining open!! The Cental Law Administration of the Parliament of Ukraine has released a statement that they are rejecting law to close adoptions. This just happened today.

We are waiting for more details but from what we have been told, Parliament cannot go against this decision and 4313 should be rejected. I will post more when I get more details - I think I might be able to get a translated copy of the decision. We continue to pray and praise God for this very hopeful news!!!

HELP Keep Ukrainian Adoptions OPEN!!!

2010-11-21T06:36:00.000-08:00

There are always those in the Ukraine government who are working to shut down international adoptions. This movement has recently gained momentum and a bill has already passed once! It will be voted on once more and if passed, it will become law!!!

Our facilitator feels that this will not happen until Spring but that it is a strong possibility at that point. When I think of children that I know, who have families coming for them in the Spring (they aren't available until then), I can't help but do something. Some of these children have been waiting for years and are just about to go home. Oh Lord, please change the hearts of those who will make these decisions.

Please read this link below for the details on what is going on.

http://www.nogreaterjoymom.com/2010/11/their-lives-depend-on-it.html The only thing that we have heard differently (and from a very reliable source who is Parliament) is that it will definitely not happen before February and maybe even later...) So we have time NOW to make a difference.

Here is information reposted from http://littleboydove.blogspot.com/2010/11/adoption-awareness-way-you-can-care-for.html

Even if you don't feel the call to adopt, you can get involved in orphan care. And here's a simple way to get involved today...

By now, most of you have probably heard about the decision in Ukraine to go forward with a vote to halt international adoption until an inter-country agreement is in place. Please take a moment to write to your senators & congressmen, then encourage your friends and family to contact do the same!

Below you'll find a letter that you can use, or write your own.
To send a letter to your congressman:
https://writerep.house.gov/writerep/welcome.shtml

To send a letter to your senator just click on the state and follow the link:
http://www.senate.gov/general/contact_information/senators_cfm.cfm

Please help us get the word out!!
________________________________________________________

Dear (name),

I am writing to you today regarding a VERY urgent situation. Many families in the US are currently in the process of adopting children from orphanages in Ukraine. Most of these children are older or disabled. American families adopting these children offer them what may be their only opportunity at a normal and productive life free of crime, prostitution, or institutionalization due to illnesses that are treatable in the United States. I personally know one of these families.

On November 3, 2010, the Ukrainian parliament voted to proceed with voting on legislation that would halt all international adoptions until inter-country adoption agreements are in place (see the State Dept. announcement at http://adoption.state.gov/news/ukraine.html) . At this point, all that is needed for this to become law is one more vote in Ukrainian parliament and a signature by the Ukrainian president. This could happen any day. If it does, many families and innocent children will be greatly affected. I personally know one of these families.

I am writing to you to urge you to act quickly on this matter by 1. Contacting your Ukrainian cohorts and requesting a consideration of revision of the law to allow adoptions to proceed while the agreement is being drafted (as was done in Russia) and 2. Work with your colleagues in congress to begin drafting this agreement so that it is ready to go in the event the law passes.

Thank you for your timely consideration of this urgent matter!

First and foremost - PRAY!!

And second - please take a few minutes to contact your congressman and senator. Use this letter, or change it to make it fit your situation - whether you have adopted or just know someone who has or who is in process. Thanks guys!

A Heavy Heart

2010-11-14T20:25:00.000-08:00

My heart is heavy for so many today. But for a few in particular. I could (and will soon) do a post on the incredible miracles that have taken place, resulting in so many new adoptions that have been recently completed or that are in process. We now have a pretty large number of Ukrainian American children living in our community!! I used to dream about this happening and I am so exciting to see it becoming a reality. More on that later!

But today my heart grieves for those left behind. Those who feel that they have no hope. Those who are hurting and aching for comfort and love but have none. Those who still ask, "Why not me? Is there anyone who wants me?" And these are not questions I made up - these are questions that children looked at us asked. Just yesterday my friend was asked these very questions once again by a friend of the child that she is adopting.

It sure was a whole lot easier when I didn't know these kids names, hobbies, person

alities, strengths, weaknesses, fears, hopes, and dreams. It was easier when they were more removed from me personally.

But it wasn't easier for them.

So I will rejoice with every one that finds his or her way home. And I will continue to pray and advocate for those still waiting. And perhaps there is more that God is calling us to do to love these children. I am quite certain that our work is not done just because we have adopted.

Please read this very powerful post and consider what else God might have for you to do in ministering to those who desperately need hope.

http://www.nogreaterjoymom.com/2010/11/reckless-abandon.html

It is Orphan Awareness Month - my prayer is that we would all be not only more 'aware' of the crisis that surrounds us, but also be increasingly active and involved in offering hope and love.

Potts Academy

2010-11-12T19:10:00.000-08:00

Okay so I really can't believe that it is already November!!! My last post summarized school last year and now we are almost to Christmas break of this one!! How time flies...

This year the Potts Academy has added to it's numbers :) I couldn't be more excited about my sweet new student! Galina joined our homeschool just before the year started and she has been a true delight to teach. I sometimes just catch myself staring at the three of them sitting at my kitchen table in disbelief. I can barely fathom that just over two years ago they were all three in a classroom in Ukraine together and now they are in a small town in Texas learning together in English. I can't help but continually be in awe of God's incredible tapestry in weaving our lives together. It may appear messy at time, but is sure is breathtaking when we get glimpses like this.

Although Galina has known English for a year less than my girls, she has caught right up and even skipped a grade level of math so that she could be in the same math book that they are doing. The first month took some extra work, but now it is me that is being blessed by her presence and participation in our learning. The four of us have the greatest discussions and sometimes the giggles get a little out of hand, but most rewarding is to see how much they are learning and how quickly they are all progressing now. And their precious prayers during our Bible and prayer time often bring me near to tears. Their hearts are so tender for those who remain orphans and for those who are hurting and they are so filled with thanksgiving and awareness of what God has done in their lives. They get it, and it is beautiful.

Equally miraculous - I am truly loving teaching. I thought that I couldn't wait for this season of my life to be over and that I would just push through until I could put them in school. And who knows - that may be what we end up doing. But somehow in fighting to learn how to teach and what to teach, I have come to find so much joy in it!! God really does have a sense of humor :)

WooHooo!! Survived another year of Potts Homeschool!

2010-07-18T08:13:00.000-07:00

This is a bit of a delayed post but I am trying to catch up on some posting that I've meant to do - so much I want to document so that I don't forget... We shall see how well that happens - great intentions but I get too busy to post!

Actually it was a great year for us and I just wanted to post about what Katya and Nastya have learned this year. I am always pretty shocked when I look at how far they have come. And I am always surprised when I realize that I have actually taught them some stuff!! Who would've thought that I could teach?

Seriously, it was hard and a lot of days I just wanted to quit. I was exhausted many times this year, but we kept pushing forward toward the goals we had set for school, and it is very satisfying to not only reach them but exceed them. And the girls - they are just about the hardest workers I have ever seen. They pushed themselves and me even more than I would have planned. Because of their diligence, they are getting closer and closer to truly being on grade level, which is something that I wasn't sure we would ever reach.

Here is a short summary of their accomplishments this year!! We celebrated on our last day by going over this list and then I awarded them certificates of excellence, character awards, and gave them the medals that they had earned for completing Memory Master through Classical Conversations (an incredible task of memorizing a TON of stuff - see below)!!

Look At What You Have Accomplished this Year!!!

• Finished MATH Level 3, Finished Saxon 5/4, Halfway Finished Saxon 6/5
• Learned all 8 parts of speech and how to diagram sentences with noun, verb, adjectives, adverbs, prepositional phrases, and article adjectives
• Learned over 300 spelling words
• Improved Speech through daily Speech Practice
• Completed over 100 daily grams learning lots of grammar rules/alphabetization/etc along the way
• Improved Reading Levels; completing McCall Crabbs A&B and half of Book C
• Developed Beautiful Cursive Handwriting and learned verses at the same time!
• Read lots and lots of books in English and Ukrainian
• Rosetta Stone Practice for writing/typing/spelling in English

Also learned a great deal of science and social studies through Paces curriculum and through science experiments at Classical Conversations

• Classical Conversations:
• Memorized: (all of this to earn memory master)
o 160 Timeline Cards
o 100 Science Facts
o 100 Geography Locations
o 24 History Sentences
o All Math Facts and important formulas
o English Grammar including parts of speech, prepositions, helping verbs, and more
o Latin Noun Endings
All US Presidents
• Gave over 20 presentations and learned how to organize information and to speak clearly in front of a group of people

Kayta earned the character award for Diligence and Nastya earned the character award for Compassion.

Way to go girls - I am one proud mom!!

Twice Adopted

2010-06-06T13:09:00.000-07:00

Last weekend, the most beautiful thing took place. Katya and Nastya were baptized. The fullness of what has happened in their lives is really the most incredible thing ever. And you know what? We are not responsible for it. Not even a little bit. It is NOT because of us that our daughters now have eternal hope, joy, love, and peace in their lives. Nope - we could never have accomplished something like that because it is outside of our abilities to do so. Instead, we have been privileged to be a part of the wonderful story of their adoption into our family and into God's family forever. We followed God on this crazy adventure of adoption that He called us to and gave Him the little we had to offer (and believe me, it was only a little), and He has truly done big things in it.

Eighteen months ago God made them our children forever. Zach and I, with much fear of doing it all wrong, began to teach them about God's love for them. Sometimes it made them furious at first. When I would tell them that He saw them as beautiful girls whom He had created and loved since before they were born, tears would stream down their faces as they shook their heads in disbelief that they could be so lovable. When I would tell them that God had been with them even when their lives were literally hell on earth, they slowly began to see how even in the midst of abandonment, severe hunger, verbal and sometimes physical abuse, God protected them in so many ways. He sent caring people who were angels to them to care for them. A young teenage girl took them under her wing and would feed them, bathe them, house them, and just be a friend when their Ukraine family would not or could not do these things. And eventually they were removed from this terrible situation and placed into an orphanage with some truly caring people who helped them to begin healing from all that and preparing them for what was next in their lives. When I would tell them that He loved them so much that He didn't want them to do things that would hurt their bodies or minds or spirits, it often resulted in anger or rebellion at first. When I would tell them that certain videos, music, magazines, immodest clothes, etc, was hurtful for them, there was major resistance to my authority or God's authority in their lives.

We could tell them all these truths about His love, but it was with a heart of fervent prayer. Prayer that God would reveal Himself to them. We could say the words but it was only God who could really open their eyes of understanding.

But then, the truth of God's love and grace began to take root in their lives. The resistance that we had seen (more in one than the other) began to melt away, and they began to see God's incredible love for them and that He had always loved them. They began to see that this world is hopeless and broken and that the only hope that any of us has is in His power in our lives to turn our ashes into beauty and our darkness into light. They began to know and experience, deep down inside, that His love is real and complete and they began to experience the healing that can only come from our Lord. And He more than answered our prayers. They began to seek Him on their own and to receive the truth that He began to reveal to them. We began to see their lives transformed as they surrendered to His love.

And so, it was with great joy that on this past Sunday, Zach had the incredible honor to baptize Katya and Nastya in the San Marcos River. It was a beautiful symbol of the new life that they now have in Him and how it is their desire now to share His love with others and to live their lives for His glory. They are not only our daughters but now our sisters in Christ.

I just stand in awe of how God has fulfilled the vision that He first gave us of what He would do in their lives. Thank you Lord. To You alone be the glory!!

He has done and is doing what is impossible. But nothing is impossible with Him.

Isaiah 61:3 To console those who mourn in Zion, To give them beauty for ashes, The oil of joy for mourning, The garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; That they may be called trees of righteousness, The planting of the LORD, that He may be glorified."

And as if this day wasn't sweet enough as it was, it gets even better! Their sweet friend Galina who was adopted recently into the family of our dear friends (see previous blog post for this

amazing story), was baptized by her father on the same day. She has the sweetest faith in the Lord and we are so thankful that she too has been 'twice adopted'.

A Story Needing to Be Told...

2010-03-26T20:32:00.000-07:00

Oh this is so beautiful and so amazing and something that only God could have done. I will always look at this and just truly think, "Who but God?!?!"

My heart just swells a little more each time I think of what God has done here and the great thing is - I get to see the results so very often!!! All praise to Him for the story I am going to attempt to do justice to.

When we were in Ukraine, our hearts were broken over so many children that we came to love and that we had to leave behind. The Lord has since worked in some amazing ways in allowing us to continue to minister to those children. We have been blessed to be a part of hosting trips and humanitarian aid to our girls' orphanage. We are delighted that several of those children are now being pursued for adoption. But one in particular grabbed my heart and just wouldn't let go.

From the moment I saw this one little girl, there was something about her that pierced my heart and I just loved her. We soon discovered that she was the best friend and classmate of our daughters. While in Ukraine waiting to adopt our girls, Zach and I talked and prayed about what we could do to help her. As we got to know her we were broken over her story and drawn by her precious, sweet spirit. We inquired about possibly adopting her ourselves but that door was quickly closed as she was not yet available. We prayed about starting the process again and going back for her but every time we prayed about it we did not feel a leading in that direction but yet still a love and a burden for her. At the same time, without discussing it, we both felt a strong sense that she belonged in the family of our dear friends, Camille and John. We were excited about the possibility of her being in their family but didn't really think it was possible because they were in the process to adopt a little boy through the foster care system while we were in Ukraine. We were sure that they would not be adopting again any time soon. Eventually the burden was so strong that we mentioned it to them.

They prayed and God revealed to them in some pretty incredible ways that they were to pursue sweet Galina. It was so clear and He also revealed His provision for their adoption of her. So, they began adoption paperwork and hosted her for the summer. Galina dared to open her broken heart once more and dared to love and to be loved. Last summer was an unbelievably sweet time to see how perfectly this child fit into their family. All those watching just stood in awe of how perfectly this child fit into their family - she looks like them, talks like them, her personality is like them, she was made to be their child. And we just rejoiced in seeing our daughters reunited with their dear friend on the other side of the world and in seeing this child that we had come to love finding her home.

Just after this past Christmas, Galina came home to her forever family. Who but God could have placed these children, Nastya, Katya, and Galina, into the perfect families for them? And He knew from the foundation of the world that they would be taken from the other side of the world and placed into these families. And before doing so, He gave the added blessing to these families and to these children that these families would be close friends and ministry partners? What a delight it is to raise and even educate our Ukrainian daughters within the friendship of our sweet friends.

What absolute joy it is to see Galina Lilly in her family.

Forever.

The night Galina came home forever...

Hosting Pictures! Finally!

2010-01-30T21:01:00.001-08:00

Here are all the girls (from Ukraine and those in the host families) after a spa day. They had so much fun being treated like the princesses that they each are and getting haircuts, styles, and make-up!

Allee and Nastya had so much fun in the limo that was donated to take the kids to the spa event.
Nikita was so proud of his dragon!

Kolya (in the middle) was able to celebrate his birthday with his host family.

Sveta, Alexandra, and Vika are ready to show off their skills at ice-skating! We were treated to a night at Schlitterbahn Christmas.

Where Did Three Weeks Go?

2010-01-13T20:08:00.001-08:00

The 17 Ukrainian children that Charis Orphan Care and Adoption Ministries brought to Texas for Christmas have now safely returned to their orphanages. But although they are gone from us for now, what has happened in their hearts and in the hearts of those who were involved with them cannot be returned to what it was. All involved have been changed. This trip was short but for some reason it was extra special. God did incredible things through this and we just give Him all the praise and glory for what has taken place. Many hearts have been moved on behalf of orphans - those specifically that came as well as the needs of orphans in general. Many if not most of our host families are pursuing adoption. Wow! And the children - they were filled up with love, fun, memories, gifts, family time, and we pray the presence of the Lord in the host homes. We pray for each one of them, that God will continue to water the seeds that were planted and that not one good plan that He has for them would be lost. My heart aches for several in particular. At the same time I am filled with joy at the gift of being involved in this ministry. Loving orphans has been a joy mingled with pain like nothing else that I can describe. It must be just a small taste of the love and joy and pain that our Father pours out over us.

In Fall 2006, Zach and I went to a Hope for Orphans conference. The opening was a short video with Steven Curtis Chapman and his daughter about hidden treasure. Then our speaker asked us all if we wanted to be blessed. He then said to simply get involved with what God cares about, to join Him in His work, to love what He loves.... I didn't really get it then. But I get it a little better now. Blessed we are to love our own children as well as those who remain fatherless. These 17 children have blessed me and all those involved with them in ways that are incredible. Is it all easy? Of course not - it is incredibly hard sometimes. And I have shed more than a few tears due to the sheer amount of work, the emotions, the pain. But strangely enough - the joy comes through the pain - through seeing God do what only He can do - in hearts, in circumstances, in incredible details that have caused me to just stand speechless as I just see Him at work. And I know it is all Him.

Want to get involved? Visit our website, email me for more info, consider hosting this summer, pray, give, etc, etc.

Charis has some exciting new things on the horizon...

Here are our girls from the salon day! What fun this was!!

Lots of more pics soon - The Salon and Limo Day, Ice Skating, Face Painting, and much more!!

Ukrainian Christmas in Texas

2009-12-30T14:59:00.000-08:00

What an incredible joy it is to have these precious children here!!!! Before Christmas we had a big party complete with lots of food, outdoor fun, games, gingerbread house decorating (although most were too busy to get to that) and of course Santa. Thanks Kyle family for organizing this!! It was a blast for all of us!

Sweet little Bogdan meeting Santa and learning to ride a bike.
And here is my Katya - Santa must have told her something good was coming!!!Allee, Liza, and Nastya getting a quick hug from Santa. Liza is part of the host group and such a cutie :)

Here's Anna!

Katya enjoyed spending time with her friend Sveta - they had not seen each other in 13 months!!

Tanya lovin on little Madeline

The kids were mesmermized by Santa reading a book. I think he really might be the real deal... real beard, white bushy eyebrows, a bag full of goodies... I don't know - if kids can come from Ukraine then maybe this Santa really came from the North Pole. Our translator had a few requests for Santa - an iPhone, a Surburban, and world peace :-)

What a cutie! This is Kolya - and cute yes but see that glint of mischief in his eyes... He'll steal hearts for sure :) Well for that matter - won't they all?!?

Yes in fact they have...

Ukrainians to Texas - MIRACULOUS JOURNEY

2009-12-21T18:55:00.000-08:00

I have always wondered what it would be like to be a character in the show 24. Zach and I got a little addicted to 24 while in Ukraine. But the last four days, I feel like I have been in one of the episodes with a new and difficult encounter every few hours. It has been intense folks!!

To begin I will tell you the happy ending of the story! - Between last night and today 16 Ukrainian orphans landed in Texas and joined their host families for what should be three joy filled weeks. And I am telling you - God must have some super big plans for this trip because Satan was all over trying to stop it from happening.

So backing up to last Wednesday, we found out that our main chaperon in charge of bringing all the host children was in a car accident and was not going to be able to travel. She is doing fine now from what we hear but was not up to traveling after her accident. So, the scramble began to find a new escort who met the criteria of someone we knew or had excellent references, had an open visa already, and was able to take off work and leave with only a few days notice. Incredibly, God provided the perfect person for the job - we would find out later just how much this specific person was truly needed for the trip. You can imagine the craziness of contacting people in Ukraine about this, changing airfare tickets, letting our host families know of the situation, etc, etc. It seemed pretty dramatic but was nothing to what the next few days had in store!

Sunday at 5:30 am Ukrainian time (9:30 pm TX time) 16 children and four adults boarded a plane in Kiev. They then arrived in Frankfurt where one precious little boy had some type of allergic reaction or asthma attack or something and suddenly couldn't breathe very well. It got worse and the German airport medics came running. They pulled down the poor child's pants and gave him an epinephrine shot and a suppository in the middle of the German airport. Bogdan does not improve and enter the ambulance. The boy, along with our new replacement escort, who just "happened" to be a doctor, were whisked away to the German hospital in Frankfurt. The rest of the group (including Bogdan's terrified brother Andriy) was left with no way to contact them or know what the situation was due to the communication problems. My friend was calling me through this giving me the frightening updates. Another grave dilemma was that Ukrainians are required to have a visa to enter Germany and it was uncertain whether they would be allowed back in to the airport when Bogdan recovered.

I, on the other side of the world, was shaking and crying out to the Lord on Bogdan's behalf and that of the rest of our group for over two hours not knowing what the situation was. This was from 1:30 am to 3:30 am TX time. I suddenly knew that Bogdan was okay as clearly as if the Lord had whispered it in my ear. I had heard nothing but began praising God for his healing and for putting him and the escort back on that plane with the group. Not 15 minutes later my phone rang and I heard that he was indeed breathing normally and was boarding the plane!!!

Miraculously Bogdan seemed to be healed quickly of whatever it was that was causing him to be unable to breathe and they quickly allowed him and the escort to return the airport and board the plane. One of the main reasons this was allowed was because the escort was a doctor!! Who but God knew that we needed to have a doctor escorting the children!! Can you imagine the drama that was in the airport for all the kids including the boy's big brother!?!

So at this point our group was split into two groups - half coming to Denver and half to Chicago and then all ending up in TX. Great plan except that mother nature intervened. The flight that Bogdan and the Ukrainian escorts were on was stuck on the runway for three hours before takeoff. Needless to say they missed their flight and any others that might have gotten them to TX that night from Denver.

We had 8 hours or so to figure out what to do when the plane landed. I spent countless hours trying to find flights for them and calling airports but things were beyond crazy due to the winter storm on the east coast. Nobody would help me even when I occasionally reached an actual person at the airport.

As I was praying for intervention and I remembered that there was this awesome group of people somewhere around Denver who had adopted from Ukraine. I follow their blogs and had become friends with Kari over the past year. They also bring groups of children for hosting in the summer. I thought that perhaps they might be able and willing to help with our group. I don't know them well so I just emailed Kari and hoped that maybe she would get the message and call back. Within 30 minutes my phone rang and she immediately offered to house them, feed them, meet them at the airport, whatever!!! Wow!!! I was so overwhelmed and grateful. Then a short time later she put me in touch with Felix Roge. Be SURE to read his side of the story - you will cry and laugh at the same time!! He just 'happened' to be heading up to the airport anyways around the same time our group was landing. He got there earlier and started working with the ticket desk on their behalf and was able to work a miracle to get them ALL on a direct flight to Austin the next morning. If he had not been there it would have been a mess beyond my imagination, and two Ukrainian men caring for 10 exhausted children would have had to try to figure this out on their own in a foreign country. It would not have been good. But again, God already knew and provided. THEN, Felix drove them in his 15 passenger van to hotel (which we found at an incredibly low rate and was perfect for them with a very helpful staff), got them settled and headed home. In the morning he headed back to the hotel, fed them all breakfast, and maneuvered his way with this large group through the packed, crazy airport. It was quite the adventure and MANY disastrous situations were avoided. He got them ALL on the plane and off to TX.

Thank you doesn't even begin to cover it Felix, Heidi, Nadia, Julia, Kolya, Kari, and everyone else in CO who stopped your busy lives in the middle of Christmas season to help out people you have never met. We are so grateful!! And most of all, thank you Lord for making all those connections and going before us to prepare for the needs of our group.

And so it was much rejoicing this morning when we met the group (who all had a good night's sleep in the hotel) at the airport in Austin. It was an amazing thing to see the children join their host families and the joy on both sides.

At the same time we had our other group coming in from Chicago. They too missed their flight due to weather but since there were already American adults in the group, it was not as critical of a situation. They were exhausted beyond comprehension when we welcomed them last night at midnight to Austin. It was filled with joy though as my girls welcomed two of their best friends, Tanya and Galina. They had not seen Tanya since we left Ukraine and it was a beautiful, emotional reunion. So awesome. Galina was here this summer but it was amazing to see her back. We LOVE those girls and so excited to see them with their host families!!

We have had wonderful reports of their first day here and all of them are doing very well. More updates will be coming as we have lots of Ukrainian Christmas fun coming up!

There has been MUCH more drama on top of all the travel issues - yes it is true. Some of it we just can't share on a public blog but it has been a crazy and very emotional week. The incredible thing has been that as the pressure has increased, God's grace and strength has increased tenfold. I have barely slept since Wednesday night (remember I have also been at dance rehearsals every night until 11), but God has given me and Becca and Camille and our husbands and children just incredible grace and provided people at every turn to love these children. It is not about us and we give all the glory to Him. Thank you Jesus.

Pictures coming...

Kateryna Ballerina

2009-12-16T20:20:00.000-08:00

Katya has been preparing to perform in The Nutcracker. She auditioned in August and got the part!! She is truly gifted at dancing, but we were uncertain how she would do because she really only had training in jazz type dance and not really in ballet. She was given two parts (a mouse and a polichinelle) and she has risen to the challenge! We love her dance studio and she has been SO blessed by the friendships that she has made as well as the excellent but gracious teaching of her instructors! Thank you Ballet New Braunfels and all of you families who have encouraged her in dance!

So this week she has had practices every night until around 11:00. It is pretty intense but the final productions this weekend were worth every bit of the effort. It was a beautiful and very professional performance and I was just overjoyed to watch my little dancer just shine up there. And just filled with joy and loving every minute. On the way home last night she started crying and said that she was so happy that God let her do this and made her able to dance and just how much she loves to dance. What a wonderful thing that Katya has been a part of all this. We have seen her grow in her confidence, socially, emotionally, and physically through this semester of dance.

Orphan Sunday

2009-11-10T13:56:00.000-08:00

We just wanted to share that we were incredibly blessed this past Sunday. You probably know that it was adoption Sunday and I have been thrilled to hear about so many churches using this opportunity to share testimonies of adoption and about the many other ways that people can minister to children who are suffering without their physical and emotional needs being met.

Our family has a new church, and while it was not one of the reasons that we initially joined this church, it seems that God has moved us there because of a shared passion. Many people at the church are passionate about orphans and adoption. This Sunday, my good friend's husband spoke about adoption - both the adoption of children and our adoption as children of God. It was awesome. Then we were invited up to tell a little about our journey to bring our girls home, and our girls were interviewed. They did such a great job - it is powerful to hear them speak about what they can now see that God has done in their lives. We were just filled with joy to give all the glory to God for what He has done in their lives and ours.

So if you are wondering more about our journey or about adoption, just go listen!!

www.livestream.com/riverstone. Click on menu and then video library -- Nov. 8th.

CELEBRATING ONE YEAR HOME!!

2009-11-02T19:31:00.001-08:00

WOW - This time last year we were shell shocked, tired and there was truly 'no place like home' for all of us :) It is hard to believe that one year ago Katya and Nastya barely spoke English, I was clueless and terrified of homeschooling, our kids didn't really all know one another that well yet, BUT we were finally together as a family!!

What a year it has been! We have seen God knit our hearts together and deepen strong bonds among our children. Our girls have learned what it really means to be a family. They have learned what love really is. We have seen the healing that has taken place in their hearts as they have come to know the safety and unconditional love of their family and of their Lord. I have learned how to depend on God and see Him provide in ways I never thought imaginable. I have learned that I can do way more than I ever thought possible. I have also learned that I really like teaching :) I have learned that my husband really is the greatest husband and father that a girl could ever hope to have. What a beautiful thing to see that our daughters have truly become daddy's girls.

Tonight we celebrated with borscht of course (it's starting to feel like this is a regular dish in our menu and I think I actually really enjoyed it tonight)! We also had some good "Russian Black Bread" and veriniki (otherwise know as pot stickers/dumplings). We invited my parents and sister's family over, gave them their cards that the girls had made, and enjoyed a yummy ice cream cake. It was a very special, fun, and laid back celebration!

I just must point out here that in this picture below you see an Ethiopian, now American, eating Ukrainian borscht :) And lovin it! They don't get much cuter than you Bennet!

We decided to copy Melanie Hall's wonderful idea to celebrate by thanking all the people who helped make it possible for our girls to be adopted. Thanks Melanie for such a wonderful idea. The past few weeks we (the girls and I) have been writing letters to people who were important parts of their adoption. It has been incredible to look back over their journey home and see how many people God put in our lives and theirs to make it possible. Each one had a role - some prayed (perhaps the most significant role of all), some helped financially, some helped practically (free meds, childcare, documents, preparing our house, etc), some loved our girls before we could, some walked us through the legal process in Ukraine (thanks Natalia), some translated at crucial moments, some encouraged us when the future looked scary and overwhelming, and the list goes on and on. Truly this was not a journey we have walked alone - we have had one blessed part - to be their parents but so many of you reading have had a crucial role as well. You may not all get a card but if you have prayed, encouraged, or any of the above - THANK YOU!!

And then above all else, we have been awed once again as we have reflected back and thanked our Lord for what He has done. He is so amazing and I just can't begin to describe how sweetly we have experienced Him walking through this journey with us, just holding us by the hand and leading us one day at a time. Oh Lord, all praise and glory goes to you. Thank you for the gift of our Ukrainian daughters.

"For from him and through him and to him are all things. To him be glory forever"

Romans 11:36

God must have special plans for little Sasha...

2009-10-31T20:15:00.000-07:00

Incredibly ALL the money has been raised for Sasha's adoption by the Norenes!! And her medical care is already being prepared for when she comes home. AND Jennifer has found a Christian University in Donestk to stay at and feels much safer and less alone. It blows my mind how people's hearts were moved to support this child's adoption in such an enormous and timely way. People who have never met Sasha or Jennifer or John were moved to donate generously. What an incredible blessing to see God provide.

Here is an update from Jennifer~

Good news! My computer is fixed! A kind man at the university has fixed the cord and provided the adaptor I needed. My adaptor was not working with my computer. So this is great news! I can skype now for free and not depend on cell phone for communication so much! My attorney is on her way to Kyiv to file papers, court on Thursday here in Donestk. Tonight Sasha was testing me with her behavior and we left on somewhat grumpy terms. When I was walking away from the orphanage, there she was in the window waving at me as if to say, "I am sorry Mama". You can imagine it is difficult to teach, reign in a very active bright little girl, when I can't speak her language...and she is pretty bright, so she wants to get away with everything (ravage my bag, eat all the candy, etc. teach ME Russian instead of learning English) Tomorrow we are going to start working on English we will need in the next few weeks as we prepare to travel to the US. Thanks for continued prayers, thank fully God has supplied ALL we need, even more. This is a huge blessing and testimony to step out in faith. I guess I was foolish to come without every need met, but my love for this little girl compelled me and I believe God met me in that. Matthew scriptures on DO NOT worry and one day's worries at a time, come to mind. Those were precious scriptures to me before this trip as well as Jeremiah where he speaks of God's faithfulness **despite setbacks**. Setbacks don't mean ANYTHING to God when you walk in His will. He has not abandoned us even when it looks like we are in the enemy's camp and the Light is turned off. The light is NOT off! God is faithful, He comes through! We are to really have child like trust in God. Foolish to the world for sure. (I wish I remembered this always...today is a good day!) God even pushed me to see that worry is disobedience. We are to trust, no matter what. Tough words I know! I am overwhelmed when I think that not only has God supplied all we need here, but he has already begun supplying the BEST medical are the US has to offer through Family Life ministries connectinos who heard of our adoption. They also were responsible for hooking me up with Donestk University to stay - a secure Christian environment. All because of Grace Adoption Ministries. Aloha Ministries, and so many individuals who gave probably more then they could by faith. He is truly not interested in what we can acccomplish on our own but what He accomplishes through us if we will only trust Him! More tomorrow friends, many many thanks and hugs from Donestk, Ukraine! Jennifer

THANK YOU so much to each of you who have prayed and donated - both have been powerful in this time!! Keep praying and I will update about her process!

URGENT Need

2009-10-29T19:48:00.000-07:00

I want to share with you about an extremely urgent situation and ask for your prayers and for your assistance if you feel led to do so.

A mutual friend of ours, Camille's and Becca's (the three of us that started GRACE Adoption Ministry) is currently in Ukraine trying to adopt a precious little seven year old girl named Sasha. Sasha has rheumatoid arthritis due to a serious illness that she had when she was younger. She also has some type of heart condition. The current steroid medication that she is on is not being monitored well and has caused her to swell up quite a bit. She needs medical attention as well as a family. Our attorney, Natalia, who handled our adoption, met this child and promised Sasha that she would help her find a family. Natalia sent Sasha's picture to Camille who later sent it to the Norenes. John and Jennifer Norene of New Braunfels felt called to this child and committed to pursuing Sasha's adoption. However, they have, in this time of a very difficult economy, lost their jobs/business and had financial setbacks. They continued in faith to pursue Sasha's adoption and received the invitation to go to adopt her much quicker then they anticipated. They had to leave quickly because Sasha is being kept at the younger-child orphanage only for a short time and then will be moved to an invalid orphanage - which I can not even begin to describe the horrific stories I have heard about those places from missionaries who have visited them. To save money and so that John could continue in his new job, only Jennifer was able to travel, with faith that God would provide for her to adopt this child at each step. She left with only enough for a fraction of the adoption and many fundraising efforts still going on. It seemed as if several grants were only days away from coming in but apparently they have not. It is really a difficult situation. Our attorney is discounting her fees as well but there are many legal costs involved in an international adoption.

Basically, if Jennifer and John do not receive several thousand dollars within the next few days then they will not be able to take the next necessary steps to adopt Sasha. Jennifer is in Ukraine and has been spending time with her. Jennifer is struggling deeply with the uncertainty of it all, culture shock, and loneliness. Sasha does not have much hope as a disabled orphan in Ukraine if she is not adopted. She will soon be sent to an orphanage for invalids and it is a very hopeless, bleak outcome at these type of institutions. She is in need of $6500 at least to complete this adoption and I am not sure if that includes their tickets back home. Incredibly, just since emails went out about this tonight $3000 of that has been raised - in literally less than an hour.

I want you all to know that I do not do fundraising well - but I truly believe that Sasha's life is at stake and I have seen people come together in amazing ways to do what seems impossible. However, my intention is not to convince every reader to donate but to be aware of this and to pray and ask the Lord if He would have you help in some way. Perhaps it is to give and perhaps it is to pray. Jennifer, John and Sasha need both!

You can go to our ministry website www.graceadoptionministry.com and to the donate section. It will let you donate through paypal. Please send me an email too stephaneep@hotmail.com so that we know how much is being given and can immediately let Jennifer know due to the very time-sensitive issues and decisions that have to be made.

Here's Sasha...

Happy 11th Birthday Anastasiya Joy!!!

2009-10-13T19:00:00.000-07:00

On Saturday, we celebrated sweet Anastasiya's 11th birthday!! It was such a special day and we just praise God for her life and that he made this precious child our daughter. We love who He created her to be and have been privileged to watch her grow and blossom this past year. We love you so much baby girl!!!

We woke up early Saturday morning and took her the cake that we had made. She was already awake, but knew she had to wait in bed so that we could 'wake her up' with the cake :) She has that tradition down!! It was such a fitting cake complete with horses of course...

This picture looks like the horse is jumping through flames.

Soon after that, we ate breakfast and opened presents. She loved every minute and just as she was opening the gift that her godmother, Alla, in Ukraine had sent, we received an email message from Alla. She was asking if we could call so that she could wish her a happy birthday.

We were able to 'see' Alla and some of Nastya's best friends via Skype. They were able to talk for quite awhile and it was very special to her that her friends were thinking about her. We enjoyed 'seeing' them as well!!! What a wonderful blessing Alla has been to my girls and to so many others who are in the orphanage. She is truly an angel to them and they feel such love from her.

Back to the present opening - Nastya had a bag in it with a little card that told her 'sang' the chicken dance and read that her surprise went 'peep, peep' and was awaiting in our bathroom. Yep she got baby chicks for her birthday! And according to her they were "the very best gift in the whole world!" She has been begging for us to start a coop and asked if she could pleaaaaasssee have it for her birthday but she was completely surprised.

Here she is with her peeps...

Yes - that is six chicks in my bathroom... They have now been moved to her room and will soon be moved out to the soon-to-be-built chicken coop. In the meantime - they might just be the most loved little chicks that ever existed.

Finally we had borscht for dinner. It again received the Ukrainians' stamp of approval. This time I did use a food processor for the veggies - way better plan!! We talked about our favorite things about Nastya ~

Allee - "That she is adventurous and loves the outdoors."

Jadon - "That she loves animals"

Katya - "That she is beautiful and such a good sister"

Ben - "That she always plays horses with me"

Zach - "That she was funny and kind hearted"

Stephanee - "That she is compassionate and tender hearted towards both animals and people who are hurting. And that she is always joyful and has such a positive outlook on life."

Those just barely scratch the surface of all the things that we love about our sweet girl. She brings so much joy and laughter and love to our family.

What a gift you are to us, Anastasiya Joy.

Happy Birthday Baby!

Officially One Year

2009-10-13T18:36:00.000-07:00

One year ago today, we stood before a judge in Ukraine and he pronounced Kateryna Grace and Anastasiya Joy as our daughters. Wow!! How quickly the year has flown by but how it seems that they have always been our children. This year has not all been easy but the JOYS have far outweighed the trials and we stand in awe of what God has done. We plan to actually celebrate their one year adoption on November 2nd - the day we came home and were finally all a family. So be looking for many more thoughts as we get to that date. But I just had to mention this significant day... Thank you Lord. Great things you have done.

One Year Ago...

2009-10-02T15:08:00.000-07:00

We were in Ukraine and had just recieved our referral at the SDA!! What a sweet time that was. Oh, how I am aching to go back. I am really begging Zach for us to figure out a way to go and visit the kids and to take the girls back for a little visit in the next year or two.

The nostalgia has been incredibly strong the past two days and I'm sure all month I will be reflecting back on our trip. It seems crazy to me though to think that our girls have not been here much, much longer.

More reflections soon...

The Miracle Worker

2009-09-25T18:10:00.000-07:00

Last night we decided to have a family movie night. Things had been been busy, the kids had all worked so hard, it was raining, and curling up together on the couch seemed like just the thing to do.

The Miracle Worker is the biography of the childhood of Helen Keller and her dedicated teacher, Annie Sullivan. Helen, blind and deaf, was an angry child who was allowed to engage in disruptive behavior such as breaking vases when angry or eating off anyone and everyone's plates at mealtimes. She was then 'rewarded' with candies for throwing tantrums. Her parents were so filled with pity for her that they allowed her behavior and only desired to make her 'happy'. Helen was becoming increasingly disruptive and manipulative and causing great distress in their entire household. It came to the point that they were even considering institutionalizing Helen. In one last effort, they hired Annie Sullivan to be her teacher. Annie had been blind but with surgery had regained her eyesight. Helen immediately doesn't like Annie because Annie will not allow her to do whatever she wants and sets rules and boundaries in her life. Annie tells her parents that their pity is only hurting their child and that the most loving thing that they can do is to teach her to obey first. Annie wisely pointed out that until Helen can learn to obey, she can not begin to be taught anything else with any success. It breaks the hearts of Helen's parents, but they allow Annie to take Helen and discipline her. In quite an amazing scene in the dining room, a battle of the will takes place as Annie requires her to eat from her own plate with a fork. Despite her blindness, Helen was a very smart child who clearly understood what was being asked and was defiantly refusing. With great patience and endurance and discipline, Annie finally succeeds in gaining Helen's obedience. The training continues and with consistency and discipline, Helen is very soon happy, engaged, eating with perfect manners, learning to knit, and quite delightful to be around. Annie endures spitting, hitting, being locked in a room, and much more to teach this child that she must obey. But then Annie tells Helen's parents, "I have only taught her one thing - NO. If only she could learn one word then I could give her a million Yeses." Finally, one day with water running over her hand and Annie signing on her hand, Helen understands. The sign means water. Suddenly she can communicate and her life was changed. She went on to do amazing things, she and Annie were dear friends the rest of their lives, and there is much more to her story. What stood out to me though is that learning to accept 'No' had to come before the million 'yeses'. Learning to obey was first and that opened the door for her heart and mind to receive so much more.

Why did I tell you this?

Because of what happened after the movie. Katya and I were in her room and I noticed that she seemed particularly clingy and loving. She held me tight and just started sobbing and saying that she didn't know why she was crying. I told her that was okay and just held her. Then she said (without us having made any connection whatsoever) that we had loved her like Annie loved Helen and that no one had ever loved her like that before. She said that sometimes discipline and teaching was hard for her but that she needed it and that she was so thankful that God had given her parents to teach her. Was this the same child who was so defiant and disrespectful only 8 months ago? I told her that we loved her that way because God loves us that way. We are all a bit like Helen before we learn to walk in the joy and fullness of life that He longs to give us. But we can't even communicate with Him really until we learn to say "Yes" to Him and accept "No" as a loving response even when we don't understand. And nothing is more critical or loving to teach our children.

Katya has felt incredible love and safety and healing in knowing that we will be consistent, that we will follow through with what we say, that we will love her enough to not allow her to continue with a wrong attitude, and that our love is unconditional. Oh my, the insights and tender heart that God is giving our daughter. Unbelievable. He is the Miracle Worker.

Dreams...

2009-09-21T07:45:00.000-07:00

...do come true...

Two years ago, completely unknown to us, our sweet little Anastasiya sat with a group of girls and two mentors at their orphanage. The mentors were ladies from the community who spent time with her particular class to encourage and help train these girls for life outside the orphanage. They would later share this story with us. On this day, the ladies asked the girls to say what their dreams were. Anastasiya, never having met us or even heard of us yet, wrote that her dream was to live in a family and to be able to ride horses. You see, God gave her a love and passion and apparently a gift for horse back riding long before she ever even sat upon a horse.

Well, several months later she met her new family, and to her delight she discovered that her new host family had horses and that her aunt-to-be was a horse trainer and teacher. We had no idea of her previous hopes and dreams but just saw that this child was in love with the horses. She begged to be with them as often as possible - a love that has only grown stronger with time. When we were in Ukraine, this mentor found Zach and I and with tears in her eyes said that she knew that Anastasiya's dreams for horses and family had been fulfilled. She couldn't believe that this child had not only found a family but one immersed in horses. We told her that only our Lord could have done this.

Anastasiya rides twice a week and visits the horses pretty much daily. She is at the barn every chance she gets and is heartbroken if rain or other events prevent her from having a lesson. She is quite gifted at it, and my sister says that she has quite a natural ability. Well this weekend Anastasiya competed at her first ever horse show. She was in heaven with all those horses and she did very well in her class - fourth overall and first out of all the children in her class. You can read more about the show on the family blog.

Here she is doing what she loves the best and doing it well! How grown-up does she look with her full show riding outfit on?!?

God alone knew the desires that He has placed into her heart, and the talents that He gifted her with, and He alone placed her into the family that He ordained. He is so good and so into the details of our lives - I am never ceased to be awed by Him.

Here's to dreams coming true.

Psalm 37:4 "Delight yourself in the Lord and HE will give you the desires of your heart."

Tired...

2009-09-16T16:55:00.000-07:00

I am so tired tonight. It has been a good but busy week and I am just pooped, exhausted, worn out, drained, and my brain has stopped working. I seriously can't form coherent sentences - at least not verbally :) Oh and I snapped at my children more than once this evening. Oh how that saddens me when I do that and then to see them start to model my grumpy attitude towards one another. Ugghhh. And just this morning I was thinking, "Oh yeah I'm doing pretty good at this whole parenting thing right now, and I am even running this house well without my hubby home for a few days. No problem.." Well you know what say 'cometh before the fall'... So tonight I was once more made starkly aware of my need for my Savior...and for my husband!! We do this better together!!

Zach has been gone on a hunting trip with his cousin and I am truly thankful that he was able to do this. I mean, seriously, men need time to go kill stuff together, right?!? And I have been blessed with some great help this week with picking up kids and getting some of them to activities when I couldn't be five places at once. Thank you SO much mom and dad!!!

But still, I've been going from 6:30 each morning until 10:30 or so each night with few breaks. I will be oh so glad to wake up to my hubby being home. Did I mention that I miss him too?!? Yes, just having my best friend to talk with is a nice way to wind down at the end of the day.

Back To School!!

2009-09-12T19:28:00.000-07:00

Well, we have been rolling along finding our new groove with this year's school schedule. It has been good to get back into a schedule where everyone knows what they are doing.

Summer was absolutely the best summer we have perhaps ever had, but even good things must end or they aren't so good anymore. It was getting long, and we were all getting antsy and tired of swimming by the middle of August. We said our goodbyes to the precious children from Ukraine on August 27th. It was hard to say goodbye, and it just seems like so many of them belong here now after three months. It is strange at church to not see the ones who worshipped with us each Sunday. The precious girl (my girls' best friend), whom I mentioned earlier in the summer, just fit so perfectly into the family (our very good friends) who hosted her. I have actually never seen such a perfect fit so quickly. She looks like them, acts like them, and loves like them - it is so obvious that this child has found her family. Their hearts were so tightly knit together, which is wonderful, but it made her leaving more painful than I ever seen as well. Three months is a long time and then to have to leave. We would appreciate your prayers that God will smooth the path and remove the many obstacles so that this child can return to 'her' family forever. For their privacy we are not sharing their names until she actually gets home - hopefully within the next year.

We started homeschooling Katya, Nastya, and Benjamin on Sept 2nd and it is going very well. I have been absolutely exhausted because the start to school always seems harder until everybody (including me) gets the systems and routines down. Allee and Jadon started their school the same day and of course that means lots of homework, parent/teacher meetings, orientations, etc. So, we have been running like crazy. But back to homeschooling - it is really going well. I am blessed to have three very enthusiastic students this year. The girls are such hard workers, and I am amazed to see how much progress they have made over the summer while we weren't doing much official school. Spelling is really improving, and I think that as we start some speech therapy it will also help their ability to discern between the vowel sounds. If you can't hear/say it correctly then it is pretty difficult to spell it. Katya loves to read and to write letters to her friends and family - both of which are helping her language to improve rapidly. She is currently reading the Little House on the Prairie books and definitely comprehending them. We are trying hard to foster the same love of reading in Nastya - she enjoys reading animal and horse books. The girls' vocabulary is improving so quickly. However, that still proves to be the greatest struggle. For example, we are reading The Story of the World, and it is challenging and very time consuming to explain because so much is not understood as we read. I have to take it slow and explain - they do get it but it takes longer. The funny thing is, Ben is listening too and is just soaking up soooo much! He has the entire geography of the Fertile Crescent covered :) So, I figure that even if we only get through half or three-fourths this year that is still great. And most importantly they love it. We have slowed down on math - we will be finishing fourth grade Saxon by Spring Break or so. They are slowly getting closer to grade level. Nastya especially excels at math and comprehends very easily. Now if we could just get her to show the attention to detail that Katya shows :) I guess each has their own strengths and weaknesses - as do we all.

The most exciting thing about our schooling this year is our coop class on Thursday. We are doing these classes called Classical Conversations. It is really amazing and has proven to be very motivating for each of them. They are learning a LOT and are even taking a writing/grammar class that is teaching them the parts of speech and all about the English language. I really struggled about whether they were able to handle this yet, as it is pretty intensive, but I can already tell that it has been the right choice. They are just soaking it all up, and in the Foundations class they are memorizing these awesome history timeline cards, scripture, learning to give short presentations, science experiments, and lots more. It is really impressive and the greatest part is that they are so motivated by the other kids in their class and are making some great friends.

Anyways, to sum it all up, it is great but hard. The greatest part is that all three kids are just really enjoying homeschool right now. Nastya would like to be done faster so that she can play but she still enjoys most of it. Benjamin is engaged and learning the same thing along with us as well as learning to read. And Katya is always happy to do as much school as I will give her :) She has to work a little harder to undertand new concepts and perhaps because of her age the language is more challenging, but she works so hard and with a great attitude. It is just very time intensive for me to teach them, and thankfully, I usually have the time necessary to do that right now. I do believe that they are slowly becoming more independent, but at least this Fall semester they will require my constant help. Anyways, one day at a time!

MIA

2009-08-05T20:09:00.000-07:00

Yep it's been over a month. I think about posting often but, well, as you can see - I don't! So here's to catching up a bit. And see the other blog for beach pictures finally here!! They are fantastic - thanks Ash!

Well we all just regrouped back at home. This past week the three girls went to church camp, the boys went to their grandparents, and Zach and I... Well, we worked like crazy for a few days (it's incredible what can be accomplished when you have a quiet house) and then relaxed on a very last minute cruise vacation. That's right - I read it on your blog Pam last Saturday, googled cheap, last minute cruises, found one at a great price, booked Tues, and left Thursday. How's that for spontaneous?!? Don't ever tell me that I don't get good inspiration from you blog friends!!! We are truly thankful for a wonderful trip and wonderful grandparents to make it possible. We love you guys!!

So now we are home in a freshly organized house (minus a slowly decreasing mountain of laundry 7 people x 7 days) and are all oh so happy and refreshed. I think we have all said about a hundred times how happy we all are to be home together. And as far as timing it was perfect! The summer was getting long and hot and everyone was getting irritable before our little separate excursions. And we had time to work uninterrupted to plan homeschool for next year, purge lots of old school/craft stuff and other junk piles, discuss our childrens' hearts and needs as well as discuss a parenting book together, completely reorganize the boys' room (it was clean until they got home...), and still enjoy time together just relaxing, reading, and scuba diving in Cozumel. It was a lovely week indeed. Thank you Lord for giving us such a perfect time to and to bless our childrens' hearts with special grandparent time and great teaching at camp. I feel so unfairly blessed!!

Re-Adoption in Texas

2009-08-04T20:24:00.001-07:00

At the end of June we readopted the girls. Although it was not a hugely significant day for us since they are our children forever regardless of whether we did this, it was great to complete this last legal issue. We decided to go ahead and readopt the girls now before time passed and we forgot all about it. It was actually a very fun day as we joined up with a group re-adoption in San Antonio. It was neat to see so many families with children from all over the world. And our lawyer does this regularly so it was quick and painless. Anyways, if you have adopted internationally and live in Texas I would be happy to recommend our lawyer - just let me know. The benefits that I understand from re-adoption is that it removes problems of inheritance (especially if you have bio kids too) and it gives your child a US birth certificate which makes school, sports, getting a marriage license, and many other similar things much easier.

Ukrainian Girls YEE HAW :)

2009-07-14T20:30:00.000-07:00

It was a Happy 4th this year with our new Americans who celebrated our country for the first time!! And they were able to see a good ole rodeo for the first time. They may think our country is nuts to have people riding on the back of crazy bulls... But Nastya is sure that she will be barrel racing by next year :) Of course - our little horse loving, dare devil!!

And she even got to try out a little bull riding herself...

And they all got good and dirty in the calf scramble!!

Good times!!

Coming Full Circle...My Heart Overflows!

2009-06-27T20:10:00.000-07:00

Well it's been a bit busy and more posts with beautiful pics (compliments of my talented photographer sister) from our beach trip will soon be coming on the other blog. But for now I just have to post about the hosting trip and about what it has meant to our family and to our girls.

Three weeks ago we stood in the airport and hugged and cried as we again saw the familiar faces of the precious children we had told goodbye just seven months ago. What an amazing way for God to answer our cries for them by bringing so many of them right here to Texas!!! We continue to pray for them as they walk through the joys and trials of hosting.

But what struck me the most was how incredibly far our girls had come. I didn't realize what had happened in our hearts and in theirs until I stood in the same place where we first met our daughters and watched other families joyfully but awkwardly welcome them for the summer. Spending time with these families and trying to encourage those who are struggling with varying issues has reminded me of the sometimes intense struggles that we faced during the early months. But oh how quickly I had forgotten and how quickly our sweet girls have grown in so many ways.

For one, here is a picture of Katya writing a welcome sign for one little boy who is here.

For another, my girls have repeatedly had the opportunity to translate for families both in person and on the phone. They have the privilege of helping others who are experiencing some of the same fears and struggles that they went through only a short time ago. And they delight to do so. I have had the privilege of seeing their compassionate hearts for their friends and classmates as they have desired to help those who are having a harder time and have initiated the most heartfelt prayers for them. Not to mention just the sheer joy of being in the company of their closest friend who is more like a sister. And would you believe that my very dear friend is pursuing this girl's adoption?!? Truly, who but God?!? And if you saw this child with this family you would wonder how it is that they have not always been together. Oh pray that God smooths the road to bring her to where she belongs incredibly fast. What joy to be a part of this.

I see also how Katya and Nastya also recognize how much they have grown. Tonight, I was talking late with all three of my daughters and somehow we were discussing things like stealing and lying and immodesty. All things that we had to teach them. I told them a story from my childhood about how I had lied and cheated on a grade to earn a reward and about how burdened I felt until I was finally caught and I repented. They both shared things that they had done wrong both in Ukraine and here. I asked them when they understood that it was wrong to steal or lie and Nastya shyly said, "Well kind of but not really until we started doing bible study with school here in America." Then Katya told me that she had to tell me something (very small) that she felt guilty about and asked me to forgive her. Oh so incredible that she is getting it. Praise the Lord for all He is doing in our hearts and in theirs. I pray that He will move in the hearts of each of these families who are hosting and in the hearts of the orphans that they have in their care for the summer. I pray that miracles will be done in their hearts.

This time is a clear reminder to me of how hard things were for awhile - and ironic that I had already forgotten so much of it - but how quickly it has passed :). Adoption is hard at times and it is scary, but the joy is immeasurably worth any of the trials.

God truly is creating beauty from ashes.

Amazing Events Occuring...

2009-06-05T19:02:00.000-07:00

This picture was taken just before we left. It was the last time we took a walk with these kids to buy them icecream and just talk and show them as best we could that they are precious.

7 months ago we left the Zhytomyr Internot with our daughters and we all cried. We cried and mourned because despite the fact that this was such a joyous occasion to take our daughters as ours forever, we left behind sweet children whom we had come to care for deeply. And our daughters left friends who were really more like sisters. It was the hardest goodbye we have ever had. We prayed fervently for these children and we vowed that we would not forget as they tearfully asked as we left in the taxi that day. One of the girls whom we had come to know and love would not talk to us anymore because the sadness of more children leaving but it not being her, was too much to bear. My heart still aches more than I can bear when I dare to really go back there.

But today we rejoice!

Because on a plane right now are 13 children from Zhytomyr headed to America. And 10 of those are coming to Texas to families in our community, many of whom are our very good friends. It is quite the story how this hosting trip came together and the agony that it has taken our wonderful coordinator and my good friend, Becca, but in the end 13 children will be spending the entire summer with families. Only God knows where it will lead for each of these families and children, but we have seen Him at work to bring this trip together and to raise up these families for these children. So to Him be the glory!!

Vika, Tanya, Galina, Yulia, Leeza, Nikita, and all the others - we will see you tomorrow!!! And we will brush up on our Ukrainian and do a lot of swimming and Uno and playing!!

What a summer it will be :)

SCHOOL'S OUT!!!

2009-05-25T19:54:00.001-07:00

Which means I get a temporary break - well sort of...

We celebrated our first year of homeschooling this past Thursday by talking and journaling about all that the girls have learned and about what this year has meant to them. It was pretty incredible to reflect on all that they had learned in six months!!! I am so proud of how hard they have worked. We have had fun too :) After our little end of year ceremony we headed to a swim party for the end of the year with our homeschool coop friends.

Here's the summary that I made for them.

What we have Accomplished in
6 months!!!!!

Ø Learned to speak and understand English
Ø Completed ALL of Math 2
Ø Completed almost ALL of Math 3
Ø Learned addition, subtraction, and multiplication facts very well and began practicing division facts
Ø Learned 70 phonograms
Ø Memorized The Swing, The Secret, Jeremiah 29:11-13, Psalm 119:9, 11
Ø Wrote many pages of sentences, journals, and stories
Ø Learned over 200 spelling words
Ø Finished 2 Levels of Rosetta Stone
Ø Finished 3 Explode the Code Books!!!
Ø Learned to read in English and completed many books
Ø Learned about 7 contintents and read books about countries all over the world
Ø Learned about the beginning of the United States, Christopher Columbus, Pilgrims & Indians, Thanksgiving, our United States Flag, The Pledge of Allegiance, 50 States
Ø Learned a lot more about who God is and how He loves you and read many parts of the Bible.
Ø Learned so much of life and love and family

…And I have learned what fun it is to be your teacher!!!! I love you girls and am so proud of your hard work. You are both so smart but more importantly you have sweet, kind hearts, you listen to us, you admit when you do something wrong, you work hard, and you ask God to help you by praying and seeking Him by reading the Bible. If you continue in this, then you will have learned the most important of lessons. I love being your teacher and I love being your mom!!

Let’s have a GREAT summer!!!!

We finished with me recording the girls reciting their memory work and presenting some certificates to them. They have truly done an outstanding job!!!

Here are two videos of the girls memory work - they are short but make sure you pause the music on the right.

We will completely break for a week and then do a little math, english, and lots of reading each day that nothing more exciting is going on :) Yea for summer!!!

Happy 13th Birthday Kateryna!!!

2009-05-06T20:20:00.000-07:00

And 1st Birthday Home!!!

What a special, sweet day it was. Katya has been anticipating this day since she got home. This morning our birthday princess was awakened to a birthday cake with 13 candles and her entire family singing Happy Birthday. She smiled ear to ear and blew out her candles. She was then led into the living room which had been decorated with pink crepe paper, balloons, and princess plates for the cake. We ate breakfast and she was literally giddy :) Then she opened the presents from Zach and me. She received a Princess Belle dress (she just loves Disney princesses and wanted this even though most girls her age might have already tired of princess stuff, but for her this is the first time to have these type of things). Then for her big present - an IPOD loaded with all her favorite songs. She was beyond delighted and just couldn't stop hugging and kissing us and telling us thank you. Every new song that she discovered was a delight - 1000 Miles by Mark Shultz is her dance song for ballet and she was so happy to have it along with the Sound of Music soundtrack and lots of other favorite songs.

After she got dressed (as Princess Belle) for the day, she came out and gave me a tight hug and told me in a choked voice, "Momma thank you, for you and Daddy doing all this for me. In Ukraine, I never had birthday like this. It is soooo good day!! I LOVE you soooo much!" I tried to include her cute grammar for you - throw in a strong accent and you'll hear her too :)

Sweet girl, it is such a joy to see you feeling loved and cherished and to know how precious you are. You are truly wonderfully made and we are so very thankful that God made you our daughter... What a privilege to be able to celebrate the life of our daughter and to show her that she is precious and special and cherished. How I longed to be able to show her this in the year before we came home and how amazing to see how she really gets it now and readily accepts our love.

Okay so I did go ahead and make them do a fairly full school day with a little extra free time to listen to her music and just relax. I even took a nap because birthdays wear mothers out!!

Then I braved the cooking of BORSCHT!!! This was waaaay harder than I thought but only because you have to grate like a hundred vegetables. And I really hate to cut up veges. Had I realized this, I would have borrowed my mom's food processor but oh well - I now have beet stained hands and really had the borscht experience. The greatest part about it was that it turned out good!!! The girls gave it their official approval and ate two bowls a piece! Our other kids liked it too and I thought it was okay. (I loved Ukraine food but this was never my favorite.) Wow - big accomplishment to meet their borscht approval rating - I don't think they had a lot of confidence in my abilities going into it!! (If you want the recipe I used let me know - I borrowed it off another blog.)

Finally we ate and said a few of our favorite things about Katya. She is: Sharing, kind, sweet spirited, very helpful with a joyful spirit, energetic, loving, has a beautiful smile, is a great dancer, and a wonderful sister. The kids all had presents for her and she was so overwhelmed with all the love and gifts that I saw that she was holding back tears and clearly moved by such love towards her. What a wonderful sight to see.

We thank God for creating Katya just the way He has and for placing her in our family. He truly has protected and guarded her and brought her to us. We are blessed to be her parents.

We love you Kateryna!!

Last note....I am in complete denial that I am now the mother of a teenager. Goodness, wasn't I just a teenager not that long ago? Well that is another post, ha! :) But seriously, that does make me feel old!!!

Heart Healthy

2009-04-21T19:51:00.000-07:00

A year and a half ago (before ever hosting Nastya) we were told that she had a sister that she did not really know and this unknown sister was unadoptable and had an extremely serious heart condition. We then found out on the night that we met Nastya that her sister's name was Katya and that they had never been separated before this hosting trip. We immediately knew that if we were going to adopt one we would be adopting both. Many things about this were frightening with all the unknowns. She was quite a bit older than we ever considered and she was diagnosed with some type of heart problem that we had been told was serious. We were earnestly praying about what to do but in our minds it seemed impossible. We were unable to ever get a clear diagnosis about her heart and at one point in the waiting time (before meeting Katya) we learned that she had been sent to a sanatorium for treatment for her heart. This sounded serious!!! We were also told that she ran and played and seemed very normal. It was all very confusing. The only thing that was clear was that God was calling us to adopt these girls. We kept returning to the fact that we could absolutely trust Him. We said we did but could we put that into action? Many times I feared that we could not and the scary possibilities seemed unending from many sides. Information was hard to come by. But by His grace, we amazingly had the peace and assurance to continue on the road that He had already layed before us. We knew that if He called us to this that He would equip us for whatever lay ahead.

And that He has, although thankfully that does NOT include any sort of heart problem!!!

Today we finally had an appointment with the most wonderful pediatric cardiologist. An echocardigram was done as well as other tests. Everything looks perfectly normal!!! Can I just tell you the incredible relief that this brings to her!?! She was truly scared that she had a serious heart problem and had been told not to run too much. She is very athletic. Sometimes Katya does experience some chest pain but it is due to panic attacks (as we had now guessed as we would talk with her during these rather infrequent 'episodes'). Actually I think these panic attacks were somewhat worsened due to the fact that she thought she had something wrong with her heart. She would get stressed about something and then feel a little panicky and then panic more as she felt her heart speed up. So it will be interesting to see if this knowledge helps her to calm herself when she feels upset.

Another amazing blessing during the echocardiogram - the doctor showed us a view of her heart from the bottom and we could see the four chambers. The walls of the heart dividing the chambers look exactly like a cross!! How cool is that? The doctor went on to explain that Jesus had died on the cross for our sins and had placed a cross in our hearts to show that He desires to lives in our hearts and to show us how much He loves us. We even have a picture of Katya's cross! Praise God for such wonderful news today and for creating her so perfectly and keeping her so very healthy. And for not allowing misinformation and fears of the unknown to keep us from adopting our precious daughter. He is good!! So good and perfect that it blows my mind. His plans are always what we would choose if we could see all that He sees. And if she had turned up with a heart problem I am certain that the Lord would have provided for whatever we needed to walk down that road. For now we are thankful that is not the case.

Easter, Family, and The Sound of Music...

2009-04-14T19:41:00.000-07:00

It was a lovely Easter weekend. We had our first mini road trip with the girls and headed north about 6 hours to Zach's parents' home. It was wonderful to spend time with them and to introduce the girls to the dairy farm. I suppressed my giggles as our previously prissy Kateryna chased chickens, watched cows being milked, stepped in cow manure, rode on a tractor with Poppy, and planted a garden with Gran. All the kids had a fabulous time but I especially was happy to see her enjoying herself and only once cringing at the smelly cow poop as I made her scrub it off her shoe :) I'm heartless! They each picked out a baby cow that they named and will get regular reports on as they grow and mature to have their own babies and become milk producers.

We also enjoyed lots of piano and guitar playing, singing, and dressing up with Gran. We have recently been watching The Sound of Music and it is the current favorite. So, Katya and Allee decided to put on a show for us. They memorized at least five songs and made up dances to go along with them. Here is a sample of the show... It was really impressive!!!! Future performance times and ticket sales will be announced soon. The girls plan to make it big time in the show business now!

Last but not least we had egg dyeing, egg hunting, a wonderful time to praise our Saviour on Sunday morning, and lots of yummy food. We are now home detoxing :) Oh, except that my Benjamin's birthday is TODAY!!! And of course the traditional birthday cake wake-up could not be left out. So it was one more day of sweets after all. But tomorrow is another day :) I plan to post about Ben's birthday on the other blog tomorrow...

Tonight, I did fit in my first run since the 5K. I am now hooked on these and plan to do another next weekend. Anyone interested?!?

Jenny, I got your post on the last blog post that I did and would love to email with you but can't figure out what your email is. Please email me at stephaneep@hotmail.com

YOU Can Help!!!

2009-03-30T19:30:00.000-07:00

We are blessed beyond what we can describe to have our two precious girls home. I look back on the path that brought us to our girls and them to us and am awed by how God smoothed the path to bring them home. However, our time with the other children at the orphanage has left a burden on our hearts that will not be lifted. They told us to please remember them but how could they know that we can not forget.

Listen to the words of this song. Really listen. I am responsible. 143 million orphans. We are all responsible. What can we do? Can we adopt them all? No. But there is a small part that each of us is called to play in ministering to orphans as God calls us. That may be adoption or it may be mission trips or it may be supporting those who are called to adopt. Each has a part and my part now is to tell others of what I have seen and to share the burden. To speak for those who can't speak for themselves.

So how can you help?

Well, that is something to cry out to God and ask Him to reveal to you personally. I promise if you begin praying for orphans and asking God what part He wants you to play in ministering to them - He will reveal it and you will be blessed beyond measure as you join Him in loving those so precious to Him.

But here is one possibility to consider right now:

An amazing thing is taking place this coming Saturday morning. A dream is coming to fruition after many years of prayer. My sweet friends Becca and Camille have both adopted, and the two of them have had a burden for the 143 million orphans that long for a family and home and who are often in desperate conditions. These two women were both a huge support to me through the past 18 months as we moved through the adoption process, and I am blessed to have them as my friends. The three of us began meeting and praying once a week last year for the children who were orphans and about adoption. Then Camille's good friend had a vision - "why don't we put together a run to raise money to help families with the financial part of adopting!" Because as anyone who had been involved in adoption, you know that the costs are huge and are very often the largest obstacle for families who desire to bring children home.

So a Charity Team was started to organize a race. This Charity Team has partnered with G.R.A.C.E. (God Rescuing All Children Everywhere) Adoption Ministry and River Stone Community Church to make this team a reality. The more money we raise, the more families we can help fund adoptions and bring children home. The families we support apply to receive funding and go through a very thorough screening by G.R.A.C.E.’s Board Members; they are awarded funds based on need and other selection criteria.

So on Saturday morning I will be running alongside several awesome ladies including my sis. I can't wait and am excited about running in my first official run but am even more excited about the reason we are running.

If you want to help - even small amounts count and add up - here's where you go to donate:

Go to http://www.river-stone.org/raceforadoption.htm and use “add special instructions to the seller field” and please enter my name. If you want to mail a check leave me message and I will email you the address.

I have lots more to update about...more coming soon.

The Sun'll Come Out...

2009-03-11T12:11:00.000-07:00

Well actually it is quite rainy here in Texas but we are thrilled about that - we need it :)

This has been a much better week! We've had some more medical and dental stuff but as far as the children's attitudes and behavior (but most importantly my attitude and behavior), the sun has come out. Challenging days/weeks occurred before we adopted the girls and they occur now - it is just part of parenting and life in general. But it is these times that help me to draw nearer to the Lord.

Thank you to those who prayed for us this week! We had what should be the third and last round of work to repair cavities and remove some teeth (for Nastya). And Nastya finally got the decay on her front teeth fixed and is so thrilled to have white teeth in the front now!! She has been a trooper through what has amounted to fillings and/or crowns on every tooth in her mouth and at least 6 or 7 teeth removed. Two of those had to be done under anesthesia as they were her permanent molars. The orthodonist hopes that her next set of molars and wisdom teeth will come in strong and that we can move them forward to fill in those gaps. It will be a long term plan but for the moment we will get a break from dental work.

We also got to visit the endocrinologist to address Nastya's small size and they are running a bunch of blood tests and took a ton of x-rays to determine what possibilities there may be to help her grow. We are very happy with the pediatric endocrinoligist.

So after tomorrow we have a week of Spring Break! Woo hoo! We all need the break from school and are excited about our niece's birthday party and then getting together with some sweet friends that we have not seen in two years.

Mighty To Save...

2009-03-08T13:38:00.000-07:00

This song was a powerful reminder to me throughout our journey to bring our girls home that God could move the mountains that stood in the way of bringing our girls home, that God alone can save, that God pours our compassion and offers hope. When the journey seemed daunting or impossible I would play this song in my heart and God used it to renew my hope. And indeed we saw Him move mountains and pour out grace and compassion to bring our daughters home.

Yesterday God used this song to remind me that He is mighty to save me right now.

I will be honest. The past 10 days have been hard. The morning after writing my last post on how grateful I was, life went a little crazy: Nastya had major dental surgery, later that afternoon I was hit super hard with the stomach bug (as well as some of the kids), Zach left town for a few days for a work conference, and then we kept my sisters' two sweet kids for five days while they went on a vacation. Throw into that piles of officework that have built up for me to tackle, a dryer that just quit working, and that wonderful time to go through clothes and make a lists for what my children need for spring/summer. Did I mention that these kids keep eating and wearing clothes and needing instruction/discipline?

Then on top of the 'normal' busy stuff I had an emotionally draining few days with one of our girls. Nothing huge, but many days of correcting the same issues (over-dramatizing minor injuries, some lying to get her way, constantly asking for more stuff, and just being very pushy in general) has taken it's toll. Plus we have realized that we have not been consistent in disciplining one of the boys and have been letting issues slide. All the sudden we realized it and are needing to tighten down and make sure that we are not allowing disobedience for our own convenience - so easy to do when I am overwhelmed with other stuff. All in all I was getting really discouraged and overwhelmed...

Yesterday morning, however, the Lord reminded me not only of my need to call out to Him and to seek Him first, but also that He has compassion on me and on my children. That the same God who brought our girls home can take care of these 'little mountains' that seem to be so huge right now. God has compassion and shows kindness to me no matter how many times I mess up, and I need to have the same compassion towards my children even when it seems that I am correcting the same issues so many times. I am praying (and would appreciate your prayers for us) that I would rest in Him and that I would seek Him first so that I have His love to overflow out of me no matter how sharply or how often I am jarred.

And today was a very good day even though we haven't quite tackled the piles of officework and the laundry is PILING up - come on over fast dryer repair people!!!! Thank you Lord!

Psalm 61:2

From the end of the earth I will cry to You,

When my heart is overwhelmed;

Lead me to the rock that is higher than I.

Just Thankful Tonight

2009-02-25T19:19:00.000-08:00

Tonight as I put each one of my children to bed I was just overcome with thankfulness for our family. For each one of these precious children. Sometimes it is such a heavy responsibility to be a mom and I see things that cause my mother's heart to worry. But then when I step back and look at what God has done and is doing in our family and the lives of each one of us, I am just at peace and so very grateful. Grateful that the Lord gave us Allee so many years ago and used her life to turn our hearts back to Him. Grateful that she is growing more mature and lovely in her character and spirit each day. We have especially seen such growth in her this year and she is just an incredible joy and delight. Grateful that we had a sweet time to talk about friends and ideals and just life as we jogged under the stars tonight.

Grateful that Nastya and Katya are here - our precious daughters forever. Grateful that they are growing and healing and that we can see God's healing hand in their lives. Grateful that they have learned English so well that Katya wrote a page long letter tonight in English and all I helped her with was spelling. Grateful that Nastya prayed that God would heal a sweet friend who was recently diagnosed with a very serious cancer. Not only did she pray for this woman but that God help her children as well. Grateful that Nastya will tomorrow have dental surgery that is very desperately needed. Her severely decayed lower molars are being removed after many consultations. And just in time - they began to abscess with infection just last week. So thankful that God kept them pain free until just before her surgery.

Grateful that my children are friends with one another. That they all interact and play together and truly love and enjoy one another. Not that they don't have their moments but they are close friends and value those relationships. We have prayed and worked to cultivate that kind of relationships as each one has been added to our family and continue to pray that these bonds would be strengths as they face struggles in their lives.

Grateful that Jadon is not too old to ask me to sing him a 'song about God' as we snuggled for bed time tonight. Grateful for the joy this sweet boy is to me.

Grateful that I still have one child who often quietly slips into my bed to snuggle in the middle of the night. Grateful for my precious, funny Benjamin who loves his mommy so much.

Grateful that I am married to my best friend who loves me at my very worst. Who serves me when I least deserve it. Who dreams and plans and prays with me.

Grateful that no matter how daunting the task sometimes seems of raising these precious children, my own perfect Father is right here with me and He more than makes up for all that I lack. I can rest in Him. Lord let there just be more of You in me and may your love continue to knit our hearts together and more and more to You.

Grateful that what seemed impossible and frightening and scary just a year ago (or for that matter just four months ago), now is an amazing reality that I wouldn't trade for the world.

Valentine Sweethearts!

2009-02-14T19:32:00.000-08:00

Zach took three little princess to a daddy-daughter dance last Saturday night. It was themed "Daddy's Little Princess" and he made cute little invitations that he put on their pillows a few nights before the big event. They were all three just beside themselves with excitement but I think Katya was especially walking on clouds for days :) She loves all things princess and dreams of being a princess - I think it just made her feel so loved and cherished by her Daddy.

So finally the big day came and I curled hair, let them borrow a little perfume and tried on many dresses before their Zach made his entrance. He escorted his little princesses to a lovely dinner at Johnny Carinos and then off the dance.

After much negotiating and persistence, he was able to secure a ride in the horse drawn carraige, which had acutally sold out weeks in advance. They all had a lovely time and came home very tired from all that dancing :)

This week has been full of other fun Valentines parties for all the kids, making cards and cookies, and talking about what love really means. We had some great discussions about God's love for us and the differences between real love and tv love. When I first asked the girls what love is, Nastya replied, "I think love is God and family." Well that isn't too bad a definition if you ask me!!

Below we are celebrating with our sweet friends by making cookies and exchanging valentines....

Finally, Zach and I got to have a little Valentines fun ourselves. My parents kept all five kiddos last night so that we could go out to dinner and SLEEP IN this morning. I have felt like a new person today!! Thanks guys!! What a happy Valentines!

Here we are this morning (after they came home from my parents') openning valentines surprises...

Round One Goes To...

2009-01-23T18:34:00.001-08:00

The Dentist!!! Woohoo!

OKAY THIS POST WAS WRITTEN LIKE 3 WEEKS AGO AND THEN I FORGOT TO POST IT. SO HERE IT IS BUT I AM ABOUT TO POST ANOTHER - MUCH MORE INTERESTING :) MORE DENTAL WORK COMING SOON TOO...

After close to six hours of being at the pediatric dentist last Thursday, we walked out with a little bit of bling-bling in Nastya's mouth and one of her teeth in my purse :) Katya had at least six fillings done but at least none of hers needed crowns at this point. They survived getting about half of Katya's cavities filled and at least a third of Nastya's cavities filled. The girls had to fast from all food and water that morning, and then when we arrived at the dentist they were given a little orange cocktail with Valium and a few other ingredients. They watched movies while we waited for the medicine to take effect. It was pretty humorous to watch it take place. Katya fought the effects and was determined to not sleep. Nastya curled right up and could barely walk after thirty minutes. Since it hit Nastya harder and because she is just a tough cookie, she handled the dental work pretty well. It was difficult for Katya who seems to really have a lot of fears about dentists and doctors. I can't say I blame her considering the time she had to spend in hospitals in Ukraine - not fun!! But I think she made the dentist and assitants earn their money - it was hard for her to stay still and to relax... But they did get it done!

Nastya has the most dental issues - lots of bad decay, some weak teeth structurally, and even some permanent teeth that are just missing (they never formed in the first place). But the good news - it is getting worked on, we will get it all fixed, and she will one day have beautiful, healty teeth. When we think of what her dental situation would have been in just a few years had she stayed in Ukraine, it is with great thankfulness that consider the opportunity to get our girls this much needed work. I hope that one day they will also be thankful for it! Actually, as much as they hate it, we have explained what would happen if these cavities were left unfilled. Nastya is a little upset that she has all these problem, but they both take the neccessity of dental care and good brushing very seriously now. Katya might brush her gums off in order to get those teeth clean if we don't watch her :) I do hope they keep up good brushing and flossing forever because they will always be at a greater risk for developing more cavities due to weakened tooth structure.

Very soon we will be getting two root canals done on Nastya's back molars and then back to the regular dentist for round two of basic fillings and crowns. After that we should be done with decay and move into maintenance and cosmetic work. No problem right! Well considering that I just had a filling fall out and had to have a crown put on (at an enormous cost) and considering that we have no dental insurance - it is not exactly painless for us either. We are spending just about all our time and money at varying dental offices! But like I said before, we are just truly thankful we are to be able to get all this done - for the girls and that the rest of us have always had the blessing of good dental care.

Cardiac Pediologist...

2009-01-17T08:16:00.000-08:00

Oh I mean Pediatric Cardiologist :) The last few days have been filled with lots of initial doctor visits and scheduling appointments for more. We went to a wonderful international adoption clinic and did all the basic lab work and testing for the girls. Their medical records from Ukraine were translated and recommendations were made for a few follow-up visits. Basically, we got a lot of very good news. Labs all came back looking great, the therapist was really impressed with how they are adjusting both behaviorally and emotionally, and the academic assessment pretty told us that although they are behind academically - they are smart and are more educated than a lot of the kids that they see coming out of Eastern Europe. All pretty amazing and says a lot about the orphanage where they were. They received better food, education, and, most importantly, emotional support and love than most children are offered in EE orphanages. We are so very grateful to the people at their orphanage who continue to go the extra mile to love these children and to do the best they can with very limited resources. Now this by by no means that it is all smooth sailing and we have plenty of trials that we are facing, but it is nothing compared to what could have been. We are just incredibly grateful for how God has provided for them in the midst of despair and of how He has protected them physically against the odds.

On the down side - we did discover that Katya has a very small kidney on one side while the other kidney is enlarged to compensate. This is not necessarily a big deal and all tests showed that she was having normal kidney functions. However, we will visit a nephrologist to make sure that all remains healthy and that there are no other concerns. Katya also has a diagnosis from Ukraine of an undetermined heart condition. There are no signs that indicate a problem and more than likely this was due to panic attacks. However, to be on the prudent side, we will be visiting a pediatric cardiologist, which I continually refer to as the cardiac pediologist. There are just too many 'ologists' to keep up with!!

Nastya of course is very small - not even on the growth charts. But what she lacks in size she more than makes up for in energy, love and wit :) She is very healthy in every other way and was blowing away the academic assessment person with her comprehension on some things. Her body may begin to grow on its own but if it does not then we will be visiting an endocrinologist in about four more months. Yet another "ologist"...

Here we are eating breakfast just before all day at the clinic. My mom was so sweet to go with us so that everything could be done in one day. They loved having their Rere with them!!

We are glad to be back home and have one more step done in the area of medical concerns.

Leslie, if you are reading - sorry about totally falling off the wagon on being tagged for new years resolutions. I honestly tried to make some but feel like it is hard to make any firm commitments right now... Hopefully soon I will be able to get to that point. For now we are just still in survival mode of adjusting and still having a ton of interruptions that make weekly routines challenging! If I could commit to it they would definitely include exercising at least 3 times a week, reading through the whole bible, and memorizing two scriptures a month. Oh and blogging at least once a week. But I'm not sure I can honestly commit to all that right now so we'll see!

Christmas in Pictures!

2009-01-05T12:47:00.000-08:00

As you can see we have been having way too much much to stop and write about it! The holidays have been such a special time! Here are a few photos...

Here are our two clowns showing off as we kicked off the Christmas season by decorating the tree.

We first celebrated Christmas with Zach's parents and brother's family. It was so much fun with special gifts, great food, and just a sweet time for the girls to get to know their extended family a little better. They loved it and were as delighted to give gifts as they were to recieve. We were also able to go to the State Championship game for Zach's highschool team. And they won State!!

We celebrated Poppy's (Zach's Dad) birthday at the same time!

Fun times openning gifts!

Just before Christmas Eve service.

Nastya finding out what type of goodies were in her stocking!

Jadon received a new castle and lots of knights and other creatures to go with it.

Benjamin is flying around now in his new scooter!

Katya loves all things princess and was delighted to be a princess herself on Christmas with her new Aurora dress!

Allee absolutely adores her new Elsie doll. She has read all the books at least three times each and has been wanting the doll for sometime.

My mom was very surprised by a new bike from my dad!! Since his frightening heart attack, he has taken exercise and healthy eating very seriously. Bike riding is his new favortie pastime and now my mom can join him! Go get 'em guys!!

The kids ventured outside to play - no coats needed since this Texas Christmas was almost like summertime!

One of the favorite gifts for the big kids (like my sister) was rollerblades!!! They've got wheels! A few injuries but everyone is quickly mastering this sport and loving it!!

So a few days after Christmas we tried our ice-skating as well! It was lots of fun and finally we were cold :)

One of the nights after the kids went to bed the adults tried out our new present - a microphone that works with an ipod. We had a couples' sing-off and my parents won!! Ahhh! So sweet!

What a memorable and fun Christmas we had! Thank you to the One who makes all this possible and gave us the gift of Jesus and of our precious family.

Learning Obedience

2008-12-22T19:13:00.000-08:00

Sometimes there are moments that I know have been small turning points in the right direction. Today we had one of those.

To back up a bit, the past few days have been fabulous but exhausting days. We have had a flurry of activity - Christmas with Zach's parents and with my brother-in-law and his family. We then went to the high school state championship game for Zach's high school team. And they won state!! Woohoo Wildcats!! So rather than traveling to Zach's parents' home for Christmas - everyone came to our area for the big game. It was lots of fun and a wonderful time to spend with family. The girls really enjoyed getting to know their grandparents and extended family a little better and received some great gifts that have been thoroughly enjoyed. But at the same time it was lots of going, lots of sugary food, and no routine. Oh and then after church yesterday we had a cookie baking marathon. All this led to a few struggles that we saw at Thanksgiving as well. It started slow but by Sunday afternoon I felt an undercurrent of irritability. Nothing major but a lot of us were getting grumpy (me included) and this led to some grumpy attitudes towards one another. Now to be honest - I was feeling perhaps more irritable than anyone and was having trouble with my own attitude. I knew this was occurring but until I had a little time to get away and pray and regain my perspective until today. I was just kinda hanging on but certainly not doing good!

So anyways, the history of the past few days stated - today I had some time to go run some last minute Christmas errands, return some phone calls, and even eat lunch all alone :) Our fabulous helper, Katherine, had done a great job as always of loving on the kids, playing a ton of games, and keeping things on a reasonable routine while I was gone. When I arrived back home everyone was very happy but I could feel still a subtle undercurrent of frustration from Katya. I knew she was feeling frustrated and was being moody. I knew that we had not had the greatest interactions yesterday and that I had not handled her minor bouts of grumpiness and subtle disobedience very well yesterday. I could feel that there was a little distance between us. I knew that we needed to bridge this gap and reconnect. I believe that anytime there is a relational problem between myself and any of my children - no matter how small - it needs to be resolved fully before it grows much bigger. So I invited her to go outside and jump on the trampoline with me. She declined which is very unusual. I went anyways and soon all the other kids were jumping with me. She rode her bike around and seemed happy enough but I knew something was going on. We talked a bit and I asked her again to jump. She happily said no but I knew something was up. Soon she rode on past us and headed towards my parents' house. We have a strict rule that the kids may ride in the circle that goes around the property (and past my parents' house), but that they may not go into my parents' house without asking permission first. We have made this crystal clear and there was no doubt that it was understood. I had the sinking feeling that Katya was not just going for a ride around the circle but was going to their house. I followed her and discovered I was right - she was inside. Now this is not a huge deal all by itself, but it was a clear act of willful disobedience - perhaps one of the first we have really encountered with the girls. She knew that she was wrong and told me that she was sorry but I told her that it was not okay to not listen to us. I took her home and told her that Daddy and I would be in to talk to her.

We went in to her room together, sat with her on her bed, and told her how very much we loved her. We asked her if she had listened to us. She at first said yes with a scowl but after a few more questions she admitted that she had not listened. We explained that it was not polite to just go into people's houses without asking first and that we understood that she wanted to see her grandparents but that she must ask first. We also explained that we loved her and that it was not good for her to disobey - that it hurt her 'heart' to disobey. She agreed! She said she was sorry. We then gave her a small consequence and she began to cry but she hugged me while crying. I told her many times how much we loved her all the time and that I loved her even when she did not listen. The important thing about this is that even though this was a minor offense it was big because she so clearly knew that she was disobeying. So after we corrected her and gave a small consequence she cried but then all the frustration melted away. We played a wonderful game of Uno and laughed together and there was a deeper connection for both me and her. We had reconciled and she learned that we love her too much to let her disobey. It is not about us - it is about her heart being right. She did not feel happy when she was disobeying - she was miserable and distanced from us. But when she was corrected and realized that we loved her enough to be consistent, her anxiety dissipated and she was once again able to feel connected with us rather than at odds with us.

We then went on to enjoy a sweet time together as a family, eating dinner, having a lively discussion about our Christmas devotion, and curling up on the couch for a family movie night - The Nativity (which had to be paused many times for explanations :))!

Funny thing is, I feel more at peace and my frustration is gone now too. I felt irritation because I was letting small disobedience issues go unresolved. So I am thankful that I had a day to recharge a little and that God gave us such a sweet time of bonding tonight.

One year ago...

2008-12-20T20:40:00.000-08:00

Just a short 12 months ago, we had been staring at this picture for several weeks and praying for the sweet girl with such short hair and beautiful blue eyes. I had cried praying for her several times and had not yet met her. We had imagined what this sweet girl must be like. We had zoomed in on this picture a hundred times and had tried to see what was behind those eyes.

Backing up a bit to last October, we had been seriously praying about adoption for over a year but it just didn't seem like we knew how to take a step forward. We had gone to a Hope For Orphans conference two years ago. I spent countless hours reading about adoptions and scouring photolistings :) I had learned about Ukraine - just feeling sure that it was where we were called for no specific reasons that I could determine. Then out of the blue my friend Alison (who also adopted but from China) told me I should meet Becca because she had adopted from Ukraine. A day or two later I see Becca's name come up on the Ukraine adoption yahoo board. I emailed asked if she was the Becca from New Braunfels. She was of course :) We met the next day for lunch and I met her precious daughter who had been born in Ukraine. Becca was organizing a hosting trip for Christmas for children from Ukraine and asked if we were interested. I said no - this was too short notice and these children were all too old for us - we didn't think we could adopt an 'older child'. We knew many adoptive families but not any of older children. Well God kept nudging my heart. That night I stumbled across this blog and read the whole thing through (crying and laughing), watched the videos, and saw the beautiful reality of how God was bringing this child into the home that He had planned for her and meeting the needs of her soon to be family. It openned up our hearts and minds to both the needs and the possiblities with adopting an older child. Zach and I prayed and agreed to see the pictures of the children that needed homes for Christmas. They were all precious but none really grabbed my heart. Then one more picture was sent to us and we just felt a connection to this child. It is hard to explain but something about her just called us. Zach and I and the kids prayed and talked and were all in agreement that the Lord was leading us to host this girl. So just before the deadline, we got all our paperwork in and began preparing for Nastya to come.

We didn't know if it would lead to adoption but we were just determined to bless her for Christmas and take it one step at a time. We were told she had one sister but that they were not together because the sister was extremely ill and in a heart hospital. We were told that they didn't know each other and that Nastya could be adopted separately from her sister. We didn't think much more about her sister at this point. But in His perfect plan, God did not reveal this information to us, because had we known about Katya we would never have moved forward with the hosting. And oh how thankful now we are that we have each of these precious girls. It is amazing how much God has changed our mindsets and openned our hearts to what He is capable of doing.

So jump forward to December 21st, 2007. We anxiously await their arrival all day. We finally head to the airport around 11:00 at night. Finally at midnight a tired group of children appear at the top of the escalator. My heart sinks. She isn't part of the group. There must have been a mistake because all these children are much too small to be a 9 year old and none of them look like this child in the picture. But then this sweet, small girl grins shyly up at me. I realize - this is her!! Zach and Nastya and I pose for a few pictures and converse a bit through the exhausted escort and then we head home. You can read all about our first night here. It was definitely a douzy of a first night but it was all uphill from there :)

So, who but God could have worked all the details out and moved the mountains that have been moved this year - both externally and in our own hearts and minds - and brought home our two daughters?!?! What an amazing blessing this year has been. We have seen the hand of God at work and experienced a little deeper glimpse into His redemptive love that He has for each one of us.

Is anyone still there?!?

2008-12-08T19:06:00.000-08:00

Okay we really haven't fallen off the face of the earth - just have been really busy. I seem to have this problem that when I go for a long time without posting then I get a complete block and don't know how to start again or how to possibly catch up. I'll give it a whirl here and try to be more consistent. Lots of posts have been written in my head but unfortunately never made it here... So this might be a little disjointed as I try to recap a few things.

Let's see~

We had a great Thanksgiving although for Katya it was a bit overstimulating which led to a lot of difficulty sleeping. So we were all very glad to back home and into our routine. The first night we were back home Zach was putting Katya to bed and she said, "Daddy, now me my house. I sleep good now." And she has ever since :) Katya is really doing well - she is an amazingly motivated student who is flying through the Explode the Code books as well as our other school books. She is learning a ton of English! She is very loving and every night when she prays she thanks God for her big family. Although the other day she was telling me that really our family is very small and we should adopt some more children - like her friends :) She gives lots of great hugs and definitely feels love through gifts and through touch. We have seen a great improvement in her confidence level as she can accept mistakes in schoolwork and just correct them without being overly upset anymore. She enjoys being helpful in the kitchen and with other household chores. She also loves to read and gets very nervous when her current book (in Russian) is near the end. It is hard to find good books to order in Russian!! But our little book lover is in good company and she can't wait to know English enough to read all of Allee's books.

Nastya - our little outdoorsy girl. She LOVES animals and is fully convinced that she will catch a bird or a squirrel or some other type of animal. She spends hours making traps with strings and food to lure the animals to the trap. She can't wait for Spring when baby animals will be born and truly believes that she may find a baby bird or deer or raccoon that needs her help. I have probably made matters worse as I have recounted stories of my own childhood when we once found baby blue jays and raised them as well as when my sister and mom raised a baby deer that slept in my sister's bed. She asks me daily for a baby puppy and tells me that one day she may make her house into a real zoo. She reminds me so much of myself as a young girl - I spent untold hours with my sister searching for baby deer and even caught a seagull with some bread and a string one time (it quickly got away from me though)! She is a bit more coordinated than I was though (major understatement), with her incredible athleticism. I love to see her soaking up the outdoors and using her imagination. Oh one story - one day she and Allee and Katya caught some butterflies and when I went into their room they had made these grass beds inside their stools complete with sliced fruit and water for the butterflies. Everything was going along just fine until their beloved cat ate the butterflies!!! Oops! They were soon forgiven though :)

Family Life - Mainly busy!! We have been going full steam since we got home with homeschool, Allee and Jadon and Ben's school stuff, Christmas, work, and lots more!! Oh - we finally got a contract on our house a few weeks ago which is a huge answer to prayer in the current economy situation but it means that we have to move the rest of our stuff out into storage by this weekend. We moved about 10 days before leaving for Ukraine so we certainly just did the primary things and left extra stuff - like everything in the garage and in storage closets and outside. So the next few days I get to move :) Oh and then Thursday I get to go to the dentist to get my tooth fixed that I had a filling fall out of two days ago :) Gotta keep things interesting.

Honestly I have just been a mix of doing really well with it all and then occasionally feeling that I might be losing my mind :). It was also surprisingly emotional for me to go back to clean out the old house. Surprising because I really never liked it all that much but I forgot what a sentimental sap I am... So just lots of emotions. If I think for more than a few minutes about all I have to do right now I feel very stressed - actually I can feel my body tense up just writing the above and thinking about all that I need to accomplish in the next few weeks. But I have tried to keep my focus on what must be done today and on what is most important. I guess somehow it will all get done, right?!? The big picture is that we are oh so blessed and everyone is doing well. "So just don't sweat the small stuff"...I keep saying that over and over.

It has been hard to find quiet time with the Lord to allow Him to renew me and I feel my deep need for Him. There are so many things I need to spend time praying over and just taking to Him rather than trying to figure them out myself. I know that I cannot do this myself and that I need Him desperately but the heavy load of busyness had made it difficult. I find myself working until near bedtime and then just busy with children. So for me - my biggest struggle has been to personally seek my Lord first when everything else seems so demanding. We do have bible time each morning as part of school and I have a few minutes of quiet to pray and read and journal a bit.

A quick update - I wrote all the above on Monday but had to edit a little before posting. Yesterday was even harder and I had a really difficult day. I know that many of you were praying for me. This morning I woke up feeling well rested and then events just fell into place and God gave me some quiet time with Him. I just feel more refreshed than I have in days and feel like I have a fresh perspective. We had a great start to school today too! Thank you Lord!!

I will post more with pics very soon!

Thankful Turkeys

2008-11-23T19:08:00.000-08:00

Psalm 106:1

Praise the Lord! Oh, give thanks to the Lord for He is good! For His mercy endures forever!

This week we have focused on thankfulness and we have learned the verse above for our bible study time (I print a tranlsated version for the girls). We have put feathers on our thankful turkeys. Each feather has something written that someone is thankful for. It has been so fun and I have seen all of our hearts lifted as we have been concious of what we are thankful for. Katya and Nastya have loved this activity and have repeatedly talked about how thankful they are for their big family and then they name each member of their family. They are thankful for the animals and for horseback riding. However in doing these exercises I realize how often we all forget the uncountable blessings that we have to be thankful for. Thanksgiving is truly something that we must choose to do and something that does not come naturally to us. But when (or if) practiced it allows us to see the sliver lining in even some of the darkest storms. The more that I conciously thank God for the blessings in my life, the more I realize how very much I have thankful for. This is something I want to make a daily habit of - focusing on all I have to be thankful for rather than all that is wrong or difficult. This is something I fail in often but I am thankful that I serve a gracious, merciful God who continues to patiently teach me :)

Today our church had a day of thanksgiving where people (including children) could go up to the front and talk about what they are thankful to God for. My heart overflowed as I considered all that I had to be thankful for and as I listened to testimony after testimony of how God has been at work in the most intimate ways in the lives of so many. I was humbled to hear so many people speak who were able to 'praise Him in their storm'. There were some heartbreaking stories and I heard how God was good and faithful in the midst of trials that I can not imagine walking through. And I saw how we all have a choice - we all have daily trials and sometimes we face things that are incredibly big trials but regardless of who you are - life is not easy. But then God never promised that it would be easy. But He did promise to walk alongside us and to be our comfort as we walk through this broken world. And ultimately He made it possible that we could live eternally with Him where He would wipe away all the tears.

And thankfulness is also something that we must teach our children - biological or adopted. However, our older adopted children come to us as children who have had to learn to take to survive and who never been taught or shown thankfulness. I was often told by those who had gone before us not to expect gratefulness and honestly we do get it more that we thought. But very often we get "I want, I want, I want"! Or sometimes we get sweet hugs that are intended to prime us for the next request, "Please mommy can I have..." And we love to show our girls how very precious and loved they are but we also want them to know that stuff does not equal happiness and that they cannot have everything that they want. The other day we had a fabulous time going with a local homeschool group to a Cinderella Ballet. It was a beautiful performance and the girls were able to make a few friends. We had a nice lunch afterwards with some play time. We then headed to the store for a few items for Zach's birthday dinner. From one of our daughters I heard repeated begging for varying items that had nothing to do with Zach's birthday. I purchased a few reasonable food items that she wanted but said no to the other things. Well then we went to check out. She spotted some inappropriate magazines and asked for them. I told her no. She begged. I told her that they were not good for her. She pouted and exclaimed, "You say Bratz dolls no good. You say this no good! Ughh!" All this with arms crossed, big frown and the grumpiest voice that she could muster. I looked her in the eyes and told her that I loved her so much and loved to give her good things. I reviewed the wonderful day that we just had. I told her that I could not give her everything that she wanted and that some things were not good for her. I told her that it was not okay for her to act this way when the answer was no. She quickly recovered and gave me a big hug and kiss. All this at the checkout line :) This is such major improvement from this summer and I know that she is learning and has such a willing heart to learn. She is so open a so loving. We are so thankful that she truly has a sensitive spirit and that her heart is soft to us. However, it does require a lot of emotional energy and patience from me and I don't always do it right.

Tonight I gave each of the kids a package of stickers because they had all been wanting some and I just happenned to see some the other day. The girls were given beautiful disney princess stickers that they had been asking for and the boys were given spiderman stickers. Well it just so happened that the boys had four small sheets of stickers while the girls only had one larger sheet. No one even noticed this except this one child (yes the same one). She quickly said, "Maaamaa, Jadon has big (meaning lots of) stickers and I have small stickers." Again with the familiar pout. I calmly walked over to her and said that since she did not like her stickers that we would keep them. I took them from her and put them up. I told her that I loved her very much and that we could talk whenever she wanted. She put her head on the table and made a show of crying. I ignored this and went on with getting everybody ready for bed. Finally I told her to stop crying and told her that it was not okay to compare to each other and that we need to be grateful for what we have. I pointed out that I give them different things at different times and that just that morning we had given her two new dresses and nothing to anyone else. (She needed dresses and no one else did.) I also pointed out that just the other day daddy gave the girls stickers and that the boys didn't get any. I told her that it made me feel sad when she did not appreciate a special surprise. She was very receptive and I think truly sorry for her behavior. We hugged and went on to have a nice evening. I know that she was very hurt to be corrected and needed to know that we loved her so very much. I spent some extra time cuddling and loving her this evening. We talked some more about it and I think she was embarrassed that she had acted so silly. We also talked about what to do this Christmas if she recieves a gift that she does like very much :)

Both of these and many other times are great opportunites for us to teach the girls what it means to be polite and to be thankful. But let me just say that they wear me out at the same time! We long for our children to not just be polite but much more importantly to have hearts that can see the goodness of God in their lives and respond with thanksgiving. The truth is that God is at work doing amazing things in our lives and the world around us but we so often miss the beauty of His goodness because we get caught up with the present stressors of life. I pray that Zach and I are able to cultivate and model hearts that overflow with thanksgiving.

We do feel that things are going remarkably well and that both the girls are really adjusting well. We have certainly had varying issues to work through - some sibling issues and other basic things to work out like where everyone sits in the car and eating rules. Stuff like that. But we are getting into a great routine and are just incredibly thankful for each of our precious children. We have been amazed at how God is already knitting each one of our hearts together. What a sweet time this has been even if it has been a little tiring :)

It's a Zoo Around Here!!

2008-11-14T18:52:00.000-08:00

Well that part is true at home with five children and lots of pets :) but we also did take a trip to the zoo today. It was tons of fun and very special because Katya and Nastya had never been before. We were all in awe of so many amazing creatures and everyone especially loved the momma and baby monkeys and the butterfly house. As always - the zoo wore us all out and now all children are sleeping soundly! We also wrapped up this fun day with starting a Friday night family movie. Thanks for that idea Connie! We decided to start watching Little House on the Prairie and started with episode one tonight. The Little House series is a favorite of ours and we felt like it would be good to help the girls get into it as well. It has some great lessons about life in general but especially about family. The girls are hooked already! Plus it is only 45 minutes on DVD so we are more likely to watch it without the pressure of a longer movie.

Everyone keeps asking how we are doing and I must say we are doing waaaaay better than Zach or I thought we would be doing the first few weeks. Besides the fact that it is just a lot of work :) everything is going very well. Duzhey Dobre!! We started homeschool for Katya and Nastya this week and while I was so nervous beforehand, I was pleasantly surprised (actually shocked) at several things ~

One, the girls love to learn and often ask for even more! Two, they are quite obedient about the rules that we have set forth about school time as well as basic family rules. Three, I am having a lot of fun teaching them. It is so awesome to show them the concept of borrowing in math and see them get it so quickly! Or for another example - they had never been taught to tell time on a clock face (only on digital clocks). So I bought some workbooks and with just about two lessons they were telling time perfectly! Wow! It is so fun to teach older kids who are able to grasp concepts that they should have learned years ago. When I show them something it is great to see them light up with understanding. They must be enjoying school too because Katya asked me if I would be her teacher until she graduates :) They are about at the same place in math, which is a huge blessing that I can teach the same thing to both. We are just doing worksheets for now but I plan to order curriculum very soon. They are also learning English very quickly - we are using Rosetta Stone and just talking as much as possible. We just learn things as we go - days of the week, household things, etc. It is so interesting to see their different styles of learning and varying strengths. Katya is very motivated and very neat with her work. If she hears a new word she writes it down right away in her little English notebook that she made. She first writes the english word and then writes down her Ukrainian phonetic version as well as the actual Ukrainian word. This was all her idea. Nastya is doing the same thing after Katya told her to, but she is much less orderly about it. So while Katya is definitely learning English more quickly - Nastya often understands more because she is such a logical thinker that she is able to use context clues to figure out what is being said. She also is very good at logically approaching math while Katya tries to memorize what she is suppossed to do. But while Katya is by far neater and tidier with her schoolwork, Nastya is almost obsessive about their room being clean. I have never asked them to make their beds but they make them every morning and Nastya's looks ready for boot camp inspection :) Katya is definitely verbal, creative, and loves to read, sing and dance. Nastya is much more logical and loves animal and outdoors more than I can begin to describe. She is downright giddy about every animal she sees and has absolutely no fear. She dreams of having a baby animal to care for and is certain that she might find a baby squirrel or deer than doesn't have a momma :)

They both had their first official horse riding lesson this week and were on cloud nine! They will ride every Tuesday morning while I watch my sister's children. It's a great set-up! They were a wee bit frustrated and jealous that Allee can canter and jump but I explained that if they work hard they will learn very quickly. They also started gymnastics this week, which they are very talented at. Their teacher was very surprised with their talent, strength, and flexibility (Nastya is extremely flexible as well as double jointed), especially considering that they have never had lessons before. They left saying how much they loved it and asking when they could go to a competition :)

As far as overall family adjustment ~ we are just so grateful for the wise advice of several friends and blogs. We were tempted to give in out of 'compassion' in several areas but we stood strong (or I should say Zach made us stand firm!), and it is so clear that we set some really good precedents and boundaries. For example, after seeing the obsessiveness with tv during both the hosting trips and the first few days home, we decided to have no tv or computer games at all during the school week. The first few days there was some serious begging and negotiating and I think shock. Now I must say that I was pleading inside for tv as well. I wanted to have a break and I wanted them to be entertained for awhile. But we saw very quickly that it was much more disruptive and upsetting to try to limit it than to turn it off all together. Television was causing us all more problems than it was helping anyone. And after day two, they realized that we were not going to budge and happily complied. There is plenty to do - school, books, stickers, puzzles, games, bikes, walks, and just being together as a family. The tv time and computer games were causing more fights, grumpiness, and other issues than I realized. Once we stopped tv, I am no longer competing to get their attention for school, crafts, outside time, and household chores. And I am not just talking about Katya and Nastya - this was true for everyone. Now we are not crazy tv nazis :) and think there are plenty of good things that come from good tv shows or movies but for now it was causing more harm than good in our family.

So things are really going well although that is not to say that it has not been very tiring and draining at the same time. I feel overwhelmed at times and it is hard work! I am always wondering how they are really doing beneath the surface and wondering what they are thinking. I keep wondering what things are going to surface and when. So at times I have an undercurrent of anxiety as I struggle with not over-analyzing how each of the kids are doing with all the changes and adjustments. It is good to be in tune with the kids but I don't want to imagine problems when things are fine and create more stress for myself either. I don't know - it is a hard balance to walk. But then I remember that God says not to worry about tomorrow and that today ahs enough worries - and I see that is so very true! So I just try to focus on what I need to do today and thank God that it has been such a blessing more than we could have ever imagined and that we have five precious children!!

Here are Allee and Katya sharing an ipod and both singing outloud, Lord I Lift Your Name On High and then Ain't No Mountain High Enough, while watching Jadon's soccer game last weekend. It was so precious.

The Journey Home

2008-11-10T19:38:00.000-08:00

Well it has taken me more than a week to have time sit down and now I feel I must backtrack a bit to try and capture all that has happened the past week!

Back to last Sunday...

We traveled for no less than 30 hours on three planes and a very long layover in Germany. But until the last bit of the trip it really wasn't that bad. The girls did great and we all slept a decent amount on the longest flight. It was an incredible feeling when we finally touched down in Denver!

Two New American citizens!!!

On the last flight that took us to Texas - we were greeted by a very friendly pilot and copilot who offered to show the girls the cockpit, then invited them to climb into the pilots' seats and have their pictures taken! Wow! We were just glad they didn't ask them to fly the plane too!

So finally at 10:00 at night we landed in Texas and ran to greet our family and friends!!! What a reunion it was! I completely broke down (unexpectedly) when I hugged Benjamin and Jadon and Allee. It felt so strange to be hugging them and the emotion of how much I had missed them just hit me so hard. It was so great to have a fan club waiting for us! Thank you guys for all coming! It was at about this time that I felt like my body was just breaking down - I could barely talk right and just felt sheer exhaustion combined with major emotion and it all seems very fuzzy now. But the joy of being with my family and friends and a yummy Starbucks (thanks Becca and Camille) gave me the second wind I needed to get us home to see an amazing surprise waiting for us!

Now, I think I mentioned that we moved to a new house about 10 days before traveling... It was crazy and although we worked around the clock to get things unpacked, curtains hung, closets organized, etc...it didn't all get done. Some important things that didn't get done was the girls room and the outside of the house. When we left there were landscaping materials in piles, no grass, no patio, a half-done side-walk, and half-built stairs on the back of the house. When we arrived home on Sunday night the girls room had been transformed into a girl's paradise - complete with new desks, a dresser, an organized closet with lots of brand new clothes and pjs, bulletin boards, and even little make-up mirrors. Nastya had a new cd player/alarm clock for her birthday as well. They ran right in and started organizing their clothes and hanging pictures of their friends onto their bulletin boards. They LOVE their new house and especially their room.

Well, that's not all!!! Outside we discovered a completed sidewalk, a lovely patio, completed stairs, trees being cleaned, grass that was growing strong, flower pots, and even Fall decorations!!! Oh, and clearing and landscaping had already been started on the hill below our house - a major undertaking! Let me not forget to mention a completely stocked fridge and a huge bowl of fruit (which disappeared in a few days!!)! We are just so humbled and blown away by this outpouring of love and kindness and generosity it is more than we can express with words. Thank you Dad, Mom, and Ash! I am just brought to tears every time I consider all that has been provided and how much you all have done. It was such an amazing gift to just know that our children were so loved and cared for while we were gone. You just did so much more than we could have ever imagined and we are so very grateful.

So the days following our arrival were pretty busy with unpacking and just trying to reenter our 'new normal' life. It didn't help that I got really sick for a few days... But with some good sleep and meds - I am back to feeling good again. The girls have done really great so far - more on that in another post. We did all go to church last Sunday and it was so great to be welcomed by our church family. And believe it or not - we had our first day of homeschooling TODAY and it went great!! Thank you Lord!

It is good to be home!

Ephesians 3:20 Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory

Home!

2008-11-05T19:58:00.000-08:00

So sorry for the silence here. We did make it home late Sunday night. Hallelujah for America. For signs that I can read and english speaking voices all around. For a car that is parked out front that I can drive. For a soft bed. For a washing machine and DRYER - I have tried to refrain from kissing them both. For a phone that I can call my friends and family on. For bedtime stories and snuggles. For an amazing family that blessed us more than I can describe right now and gave us an unbelievable surprise when we got home (more later). For oh so much more. It is good to be home!

The girls did great on the flight but it was just long and we were all exhausted. Our first few days at home have been good but a little crazy. Nothing bad, just chaotic due to lack of routine... And now I have a pretty nasty cold that I guess I picked up from one out of my three children who have been sick. I feel very bad actually. Anyways, all is well other than that and more will follow as soon as the computer screen quits swimming in front of me! Please pray for a quick recovery for me as I am in high demand in the first days home to reintegrate to life here and to love on our two new daughters and our three darlings that missed us so very much. But all I want to do is sleep and it hurts to talk...

I promise a better update and pictures very soon!

Kiev!!! And Almost Home!!!

2008-10-30T13:00:00.000-07:00

Here in Kiev tonight after dinner On the way a few nights ago...they were so cute!!
Today we finally got to meet our great friends (via blog for the past 6 months) Kevin and Pam. They are on their way to their region tonight! Great to finally meet you in person guys - in Kiev no less!!
Yummy desserts tonight!

We made it to Kiev late on Wednesday night. There was some crazy running around in Zhytomyr to get passports finished. Basically we waited ALL day and had yet one more tearful goodbye from the orphanage... We kept thinking that any minute it would be time to pick up the passport. Then all the sudden it was time and we had to rush, rush, rush!!! Basically Ukraine seems to have two speeds - whirlwind fast or wait, wait, wait! You think you are waiting forever and then all the sudden you want to beg to slooooow down just enough to catch your breath! After the slow long wait of the past 10 to 14 days, the last three days have been nonstop - therefore no time until now to post!

We got to Kiev at 10:30 Wed. night, had our medical yesterday morning and then barely slipped into the Embassy before it closed. My hand ached from all the forms I had to fill out :) The Embassy is closed technically today but they are reopenning for us so that they could process the girls' visas! How nice - we were very impressed with the service that they gave to us. So after many more hours of sitting at the Embassy today (which we were more than happy to do) - we walked out with visas in hand!!! Wooo-hoooo!!! America here we come!!!

We are so thankful for all the people who have worked overtime to pull all this together with such a tight timeframe to get us on that plane Sunday. Not the least of which is our facilitator. Thank you N!!!!

We are settled in a nice apartment in Kiev and are actually sleeping good now!!! How nice to be in an actual bed!!! And while Kiev is about triple in prices, we don't even care - it is so great to be here. One more day in Ukraine and we come home!!! We plan to do some sightseeing tomorrow, some souvenier shopping, and maybe go to Hillsong Kiev church service tomorrow night.

We will practically not sleep tomorrow night since we have to be at the airport by 4:00 am which means we have to leave by like 3:00 am. Who needs sleep anyways?!? We can sleep on the plane and hope the girls will too!

Bittersweet Goodbyes...

2008-10-28T11:22:00.000-07:00

On Sunday we finally were able to take the girls with us. It has been wonderful to have them with us but a very emotionally hard time for them (and us) to say goodbye to their lives here. They keep asking if they can come visit for their birthdays or something like that. Nastya wants us to buy a second house here :) If only it were so easy.

It is a blessing for the girls that it has been so hard to say goodbye to their friends and to caregivers.

A blessing because it means that the last two years they have had deep, loving relationships with each of their friends and several caregivers - especially Alla. But it makes it harder right now. They are actually doing pretty well. They want to go home. What has made it harder is that we have had not one, not two, but three emotional goodbyes at the orphanage. We keep thinking that we will be laving tomorrow and then having more paperwork delays. So of course as long as we are in the region the girls want to see their friends. I understand but I wish we could just say one goodbye because it is taking it's toll emotionally on all of us as well as the other children. I personally have had a rough few days. Emotionally I feel raw, and physically I have not slept well in five days. Those of you who know me well, know that I do not function well on lack of sleep, which is currently close to what I felt like when I had a newborn and didn't sleep. The difference is I am not lying aroung being waited on now in the comfort of my home!!! I am hiking all over town and my new children are a bit more difficult and sleep a great deal less :)

Today was one frustration after another - the girls broke my phone and I had trouble communicating with the phone store people to fix it. We locked ourselves out of our apartment all day. We bought a gift for one of the kids and lost it. We got stuck at the orphanage for at least two hours more than we planned and were all starving (another really bad combo with no sleep and my hypoglycemia). We have had a few confrontations (minor but still hard) with the girls - we are all on our last straws emotionally... And last and definitely not least - we found out that we were not going to be able to leave for Kiev today. Breathe in, breathe out. I need my little red shoes soooo bad!!! "There is no place like home, there is no place like home!"

Back to the goodbyes, the emotions have been hard to contain. I have had to constantly tell myself that I cannot break down in front of the kids. But it has torn my heart to leave these precious children. We love them so much. And they are so heartbroken. They are grieving in different ways - some cry, some retreat and shutdown, some get just overly hyper... It would be easier for all if we had not spent countless hours the past four weeks playing with them, talking, taking quiet walks, playing soccer, playing Uno, and just loving the children that will remain orphans. For four weeks they have embraced us, allowed us into their world, taught us silly games, taught us Ukrainian. We have wanted to bless them by showing them that their tricks on the monkey bars, their dances that they've learned, their goofy games, their songs that they make up, and everything else about them is important and precious and worthwhile. We have tried to hug and love and encourage every second that we are with them. But now, we have come to love them more. And they have come to love us more. So while we are thankful that we had this time with this precious group of children, it makes these goodbyes indescribably hard. I love too many children that I cannot help. Oh Lord, please love these children. Please bless them. Please give them hope. Please hold them. And please comfort Zach, Katya, Nastya and I as our hearts break to say goodbye. It is hard to love and leave. Easier to close our hearts and not love. But that of course is not the answer. We are forever changed - our hearts have stretched bigger and the stretching is painful. Thank you Lord for this precious time with each one of these precious children, and even for the pain - because we can take it You knowing that You love them far more than we ever could.

If you are considering adoption or if you feel that tug at your heart, don't let it pass. Pray and see if this is how God wants you to love. He will show you and He just might have a child to bring home - to you. Or maybe there is another calling for you. But somehow each of us is called to in some way love the orphans and widows. Ask him how. One thing we can do is pray. If you would like a child to pray for, let me know and I will send you a name, a little info and a picture. I promised Tanya, Galyna, Masha, Tanya, Yana, Alena, Vika, Vera, Olga, Vova, and Oleg that we would pray for them regularly. I could use some help in this! (Sorry I have not emailed you back Anna - will do so very soon!)

As sweet, wonderful Vika tearfully told me as we got into the taxi tonight, "Remember me. Please remember me." Oh how could I forget. Lord, remember them.

Gains and Losses

2008-10-25T09:36:00.000-07:00

With all the driving around yesterday (see post below) we were able to see glimpses of the struggle that Katya is in right now. One minute she was happy and loving but the next she was sullen and pouting. She said at one point that she wanted to stay with her friends and the next minute she was hugging me, begging to leave to go to America and saying how much she loved me. I gently tell her that I love her so much and understand how hard it is to leave. I tell her that we will help her write letters and to even sometimes call her friends. I grieve for her having to face yet another loss. Even because of great gain.

She had a bit of a pout when there was a misuderstanding about what type salad she ordered at the pizza place. We fully expected this turmoil of emotions - it is difficult to leave what is familiar and the friends who have become like sisters. I think it speaks of the great longing in her heart that she never really second guesses leaving. She wants a family and it is crystal clear that the odds are not good for her here. Very bad actually. The 'here and now' is not horrible. Their basic needs are met, they have good friends, at least some of the caregivers truly show them love, there are engagin activities with school, sports, music, and dance. Despite all of that, the children do not have their needs for family and unconditional love met. They beg for hugs and crave attention. There is a hunger in their eyes and actions that you would never see in children who are in loving homes. That part of the 'here and now' is horrible. But even worse is the future - at sixteen they will leave the internot. They will be on their own with no basic life skills to manage money, find jobs, or be taught how to handle relationships. They will have no guidance, no encouragement, no mom to call when sad, no home to go to on holidays, no lasting, significant relationships that they can depend on. Very simply - no family.

Dr. David's blog recently discussed the fact that there is a prevalent lie that these children believe about the reality of their situation. A lie so deep that many older children will turn away an offer of hope. All they see is a loss of immediate gratification and freedoms.

And it would be dishonest to say that there is not a true loss for these children when they are adopted. There are significant losses. Katya feels these now. We do understand. They loose yet more relationships, familiarity, culture, language, and great deal of freedom. Simple freedoms like eating as much candy as they want, playing with fire, watching whatever on tv, dressing in whatever way they like, coming and going from the orphanage freely. What they do not realize is that these (and much worse 'freedoms' as they get older), threaten to hurt them beyond measure. For the older children it is freedom to drink excessively, smoke, have hurtful relationships with each other, steal, etc. No real 'freedom' in all that. Unspeakable sadness and pain is the reality behind the lie.

There are many gains, and from an outside, parental perspective, they clearly outweigh the current loss. We can see the bleak future and the painful present. But from a child's limited perspective it is not so clear. We understand that. We are incredibly grateful that Katya and Nastya have enough perspective and awareness of their needs to see that they need a family and need hope. Nastya - perhaps due to personality, perhaps due to age, perhaps circumstances - is just ready to go. She wants to be with us so badly. She is sad to leave her friends but doesn't really struggle with it. It melts my heart that she is so ready to go. Her joy at joining our family and finally going home outweighs her pain of leaving. But the struggle that Katya faces doesn't mean that the need in her heart is any less. In fact it might be more - she has just had more time to be convinced of and to enjoy the ever important 'freedoms'. She is unable to realize the slavery that those freedoms lead to. Why? One because she is a child. Two, because she is a child without guidance and teaching from loving parents. Three, because she is a human being. I recently commented in relation to this subject on Dr. David's blog post "Unaware of Their Peril" and thought it appropriate to add those thoughts here as well.

We are all decieved by the 'freedoms' that the world has to offer. All of us at one point don’t realize the peril of our eternal future. We think that we are really okay, really good people, or just don’t think past the alluring pleasures that this world offers. And then somehow, by the amazing grace of God, that facade is broken, and we suddenly (or sometimes gradually) come to realize our deep need for a Savior. Why are so many hearts and eyes shut to the desperate reality that we all face, apart from Christ? Why were all of our hearts closed for sometime? Because we are all decieved and, if we know Him, then somehow by the grace of God He revealed our need and His hope to us. And why me? Why did I ever see and come to Christ? I don’t know except that He pursued me when I wasn’t looking for Him and He brought me to Himself. He quite literally saved me from myself. But it wasn't easy for me. On that side, there were great losses (at least percieved) and I grieved them. I did not surrender easily and was bitter when I could only see the pain that some poor choices and life circumstances were causing me. I thought that I had lost so much. I had thought myself very happy and with a bright future. Oh and perhaps it was a bright future by how the world might measure success. But inside I was not happy and headed for worse.

Little could I see that through those difficult circumstances and losses, I was gaining everything. Oh thank you Lord that you didn't let me continue in my blindness! I see the bitterness I had towards God even when He was working good in my life. I couldn't see the future and didn't trust Him yet. I had to learn to trust as I came to know Him, and now I look back and shudder to think of all I would have missed if I had things my way. Our new daughters are learning to trust as well, but in the meantime they have fears and frustrations. I must try to love them as gently and patiently as my Father has loved me. I must protect them even when they don't think that they need it and continually remind them that I love them in the process. I must say no to things that hurt them. I must love them when they are angry and rebellious. Oh how God has lavished this type of love on me and He shows me how to love my children. And slowly I am still learning that His ways are perfect and that I can trust completely in Him - I still fail often in trusting Him. My children and I - we will learn together. I will try to copy His unconditional, redeeming love for me towards my children. I can only do this by His strength. I imagine God pouring His love into our hearts and it flowing through to them.

Why would we expect adoption to really be any different for our children than it is for us? They are facing some loss now but one day - perhaps far in the future, perhaps sooner - we pray that they will see what they gained. And that they will see that it was not us but God who is doing and will do this work in their lives.

Throughout nature as well as human history there is rarely beauty without pain. There is no good without bad, no comfort without sadness, no love without sacrifice, no gain without loss.

Philippians 3:7-8 But what things were gain to me, these I have counted loss for Christ. Yet indeed I also count all things loss for the excellence of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord, for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them as rubbish, that I may gain Christ

More Big Steps Toward America!

2008-10-25T02:36:00.000-07:00

Finally! Katya was released yesterday from the hospital. I can't imagine how great that must feel for her after 10 days of sitting in the same stuffy room. N came into town yesterday to do a gazillion paperwork things. Mid-morning we went to the orphanage and took care of some things there. We gave our orphanage donation and were once again struck by the humility and kindness of the director and the other staff members. He did everything completely by the book - recording the donation with several other members present to count the money and gave reciepts. The orphanage is clearly in need of more money than they recieve from the government and all the people who run it work for such small pay. We were happy to be able to help in at least a small way. They have had two fires in the past two days, started by a group of boys either smoking or just playing with fire. One was inside the school building on the second floor and the other was an outside storage building. Thankfully no one was hurt but there are now many damages for the orphanage to deal with...

So back to yesterday - we were given permission to go to the hospital to pick up Katya. And even better - Nastya was allowed to go with us all day! I had no idea we were going to get to spend the day with the girls out of the orphanage! So we picked Katya up and she was ecstatic - talking a million miles a minute to N, who loosely translated some of what she was saying. Zach, Katya, Nastya, and I cozied up in the back seat of N's car (her husband was driving and she was in the front). We had Nastya on my lap and Katya next to the window since the fresh air seems to help them not get carsick. Zach squeezed into the middle :) We literally drove in circles from one office to the next and back again. We had to apply for new birth certificates, have the new birth certificates legalized, and apply for new tax id numbers for the girls. Sounds simple enough except that we kept running into small problems that sent us in circles around the city. A typo here, someone having a late lunch there, a stop to get something notarized, oops another typo on one birth certificate - must retrace steps and get that fixed. But do it fast because if we aren't back in 30 minutes the person to legalize it will be gone until Monday! Unfortunately the tax id office would not issue the new number until Monday which means that we can't apply for the passports until Monday. We are still told that we can get the old, blank type (they recently changed the process) which will mean that we can apply Monday and pick it up Tuesday. If that is not the case, then it will take SEVEN days from Monday until we get the passports. Meaning that we cannot do the next steps in Kiev to get us home until then. Praying for the 'old' ones to truly be available.

I'm Being Attacked!

2008-10-23T01:49:00.000-07:00

This is very serious.

About a week ago I awoke in the middle of the night with my upper lip tingling and swollen to the point that it almost was touching my nose - no exaageration! I began to panic and thought - what kind of allergy attack am I having? What if next I can't breathe? I took a few deep breaths, decided that, while very strange and quite uncomfortable, my life was not in immediate danger. I thankfully went back to sleep. In the morning my lip was still quite swollen and kind of curled upwards (very attractive). I remembered then that I had heard a buzzing sound in my sleep and figured it was some type of insect bite - like a killer mosquito perhaps. I could see where he had bit me!

Well last night it happenned again - I was bit not once but twice. This time they got me on my right upper eyelid (I could barely open it when I got up and now it appears that I have a droopy lid) AND on my right ear lobe. The ear itches pretty bad and is hot and swollen. I thought it was too cold for these creatures to still be alive but I guess they are some tough cookies and obviously have it out for me.

I mean Zach was right there - why not him? I guess I smelled better...

A few other random things ~ We moved to a new apartment last night. We were spoiled and now we are being humbled. I have never slept on such a lumpy, small bed. It barely fit the two of us and caved towards the middle. Not to mention that it is in this wierd closet-like room. All that fits is the bed and it is more than a little claustrophobic! Don't miss that romantic photography hanging above our heads though! Ha! Let's just say it was not the best night's sleep... Why did I forget to pack more benadryl!?!? I think one of us will try the 2 1/2 foot wide couch tonight!

So we finally quit tossing and turning and drug ourselves out of bed this morning, feeling like we had not slept at all. I was looking out the window (through one eye) and, noticing the new roof that was being constructed inches from the window, I said, "At least they are not hammering away this morning right outside our window." Not five second later the banging began in earnest and hasn't quit yet!

It has been interesting!

Another crazy thing that happened yesterday - this on a more positive note!!

It is a small world after all!

We went to eat last night at this really awesome restaurant. We walked in and to our surprise the waitress said, "Sit anywhere you like!" - in plain english! She continued to talk to us in perfect english and we asked if she was from Ukraine. She said yes but that she has spent a year and also a summer in the US on student exchange programs. We told her that we were from Texas and she almost fell over saying that she lived in this little town - New Braunfels! Then we almost fell over! She lived with David and Cathy (I think) Stewart. We don't know them but it was such an amazingly small world. She even went to Canyon high school. It was so fun talking to her and she was thrilled. Seriously, what are the odds that we would meet one of the only people in Ukraine who lived in New Braunfels? Not good!

Enough Already!!!

2008-10-22T07:42:00.000-07:00

Can you believe it? I didn't until I saw it first hand...

Katya is STILL in the hospital. Day 9. The girl is waaaaaay more patient than I am in this regard. First we were all told 5 days and she would leave and that seemed crazy. Then we were promised that today she would leave. So we head for a quick visit to the orphanage. It had to be quick because we have to move apartments this evening and I have come down with a cold - I'm sure from the hospital!! Don't worry - I won't be coughing in front of anyone at the hospital or they might keep me too :) But at least I have antibiotics (thanks Dr. Nelson!) and other good drugs! But I am getting off subject...

So we arrived at the orphanage expecting to see both girls but only Nastya comes running up (in a sleeveless shirt - we tried to tell her that it at best 55 degrees!) and says that Katya is not back. So we head to the director's office and Alla is there. Alla is also surprised and they call the hospital but the doctors have left for the day!!! That means that she wouldn't be leaving and we couldn't get an update. Nor could we send her a message. So we did what any good parents would do :) We took a taxi to the hospital knowing that she would be very disappointed to still be there and doubly upset if we didn't come visit. Unfortunately we didn't have time to run by the market and get food. All we had was juice and a little candy. We were so wishing that we had food because she says the food there is horrible (I can only imagine). But the market was very far away and we had to rush back to pack up the apartment. Tomorrow we will take her more food - she wants fried eggs and spaghetti?!? I'll just whip that right up :)

She was sad to be there but so relieved that we came. She told us that she thought we wouldn't come and that she was crying earlier :( I wanted to cry for her. And scream too. So she has a little cough. That's it! She is barely sick - certainly no fever and not feeling bad. But she thinks the doctor said that now she is staying until Friday!!! That will be 11 days and will only give her one last night with her friends before leaving forever. So incredibly frustrating and no one will listen to us or for that matter understand us. There is more than a language difference in this communication problem!!! We are going to call in the morning and see if we can request her release tomorrow afternoon. Pray that they will do that. She really needs to have some time to say goodbye to her friends. Maybe we will be able to let her stay until Sunday evening before the girls leave with us... We are ready to take them now but also feel that she needs some time with her friends who have been like sisters the past few years.

The good aspects of this hospital stay are still good - we have had a lot of bonding time, she has felt very loved by us, I have felt very compassionate and loving to her, and maybe this frustration will actually help her be even more ready to get home to America!!! It sure does help me!! We know that this time truly is working for good and can see that even in the frustrations!

Update on Katya...

2008-10-20T09:55:00.000-07:00

Unfortunately she is still in the hospital but we have been promised that she will be released Wednesday. Only one more day - we can do it!! She does have a bit of a cold but nothing serious - no fever or anything. She just is slightly conjested and coughs mildly. She doesn't seem to feel too bad and has been a very sport about being in the hospital. I would be freaking out but I guess she is used to it.

It has not been fun but it has also not been all bad. The positives are ~ we get to show love to her by visiting daily and bringing special, healthy treats (fruit, yogurt, sausage, juice, some candy, vitamins). This has meant so much to her. At the beginning she begged for these things and then I think she started to realize that she doesn't have to beg - that we love her and WANT to give her good things. Today she began to give us her daily requests :) and then stopped and just smiled. I could just see her thinking,"Of course you will bring these things and I don't even have to ask." We usually brought her things that she asked for as well as a little something extra and it clearly has spoken lots of love to her. She has been very cuddly and huggy and tells us how much she loves us everytime we see her. We take picture flashcards (made by Trend) and learn english words. She has learned a lot and is building her confidence. We also just point at items and learn the names (watch, door, window, hair, purse, desk, chair, etc). Today when we arrived she was sitting on her bed doing math problems from her textbook even though it was not assigned. She just liked it!! And I actually got to see what kind of math she was doing.

Oh, and a clear answer to prayer that I forgot to post about last week. One day we were sitting in the girls bedroom at the internot, playing Uno. Katya all the sudden asks about school in America and explains that she is so worried that she will not understand anything and that she is scared. She and Nastya were also very concerned about being put into separate classes.

Well, we have been praying about how to tell her that she will be homeschooled in America and expected some initial resistance to this announcement... We had prepared our speech to have through the translator- complete with a list of pros for why it was good and how fun it would be. When the girls were in Texas this summer, Katya kept saying that she wanted to go to American school so bad, and she wanted to be in any kind of social situations. We are certain that this is the right thing for the girls to be homeschooled this year to have time to bond with us, to learn English, to build confidence, to learn what it means to be in a family, to be sheltered until they are better able to make wise decisions in difficult social situations. It made the decision even easier that we are not in a great school district and the only private schools nearby would not be equipped to meet the specific needs of language and other things that they will need. So being confident in this decision we were concerned about how to present it to the girls.

So it was great that all the sudden, with no warning, we had this open door to discuss the homeschool plan. We looked at her and Nastya, and Zach told her that I would be her teacher at home and that he would teach sometimes too. They both smiled. I told her that I would help her learn English and that she would also learn on the computer (she like Rosetta Stone this summer and made great progress). She was amazed and kept saying, "Momma, teacher?!?" All with a big smile on her face. So, the cat is out of the bag with a good first response. All I can say is, "Thank you Lord"! I thought this was going to be a much harder issue. She may feel differently at times when Allee is doing neat stuff at school but this is a great start.

Now if I can just figure out exactly how I am going to teach two girls who don't understand 90% of what I am saying... I have lots of ideas (great ones from some of you blog friends!) but just need to put it together... Any ideas from any of you who have homeschooled older internationally-adopted children are welcome! I specifically would love ideas for how you got started the first few weeks - like what type of schedule you had and what you did other than math and english...

A Few Favorites!!!

2008-10-20T07:19:00.000-07:00

Adoption Resource Favorites

These have helped prepare us in so many ways and have been a joy to read/listen to. We just want to share for those who are in the process or considering adoption. These are worth the effort and money to order them.

The Barrett's: An Amazing Adoption Story - This is a broadcast from Focus on the Family. It is an amazing story of a family that adopted four very difficult children from the US foster care system. Several of the children had severe RAD and lots of other issues. This story makes mine seem like a cakewalk and at the same time it is a story of hope and restoration. It really is a story of a very extreme case and most stories I hear of are not like this. The children that were adopted (many years previous to this broadcast) are interviewed as well. I remember listening over and over to it in my car and thinking, "Wow if God enabled these people to withstand these trials and has brought healing into these kids lives, then there are none without hope." And of course that is true but this brought it home in a tangible way. And they give very specific descriptions of how they responded to some very tough situations in the early years. It helped prepare us to parent older adopted children - especially not knowing really what we might face. I am fairly confident that we will not see the extreme issues that this family saw, but we may see similar root issues in much lesser intensity - if that makes sense! So, the link to order this is http://resources.family.org/p2p/searchResults.do?method=view&search=basic&keyword=barretts&sortby=shortdesc&asc=true&page=1

If for some reason that doesn't work - go to the first part - resources.family.org - and then search for barretts. An amazing story - worth listening to even if you aren't adopting!!! Only $9.00

Carried Home Safely by Kristin Swick Wong This book just does a beautiful job of capturing the beauty of our adoption by the Lord and how our adoptions of difficult, lonely, but precious children gives a small reflection of what He has done for us. I hope to devote a post to that topic more later... But it is well written and so very encouraging. You can find it on Amazon.

There are several other resources I want to mention but I will leave you with these for now.

A few other very important favorites!!!

This chocolate is amazing!!! Dolci and Roshen. And coming from me - a girl who doesn't really like chocolate... If you are really lucky I might bring a few extra boxes home to share... If you come to Ukraine don't miss it. Actually there are lots of good chocolate and foods here - we are happy. And they really practice portion control here :) Hard to get used to but very healthy! The hardest is when you order coffee - it is good and strong (just like I enjoy it) but very small (like maybe two ounces for an Americano)!!! I make Zach order one as well so that I can have both!

We love a soup called Sole-yanka. We also like their Greek Salads with white cheese, ukrainian pizza (it really is better than american pizza), fried potatoes with mushrooms, veal steaks, chicken steaks with cheese and mushrooms inside, roast beef with yellowish rice, roast beef with potatoes and cheese, buckwheat, chicken with prunes and cheese on top, and lots of other things that are so yummy!! As you can see, we are not hurting in the food department! It really is a good thing that the portions are small and that we walk about six miles a day or we would seriously be gaining weight. ****One disclaimer - we are in a nice city of over 600,000 people - if you travel to a smaller village or even another city (I haven't seen any others) there may not be the same choices of restaurants or food to choose from - just so you know!!

Eye of the Storm

2008-10-16T14:06:00.000-07:00

We are now officially in the waiting stage. Today (Thursday) is day 3 out of 10. After that we apply for new birth certificates and passports and maybe something else. It is possible that they still have the old passports or something like that here in Zhytomyr. If so, apparently it could save us several days - maybe even more when you consider weekends getting in the way. I don't really understand it except that it may mean we will go home a few days sooner than later. So I hope it is true! We will not know until it happens (this is becoming a familiar theme).

So our schedule lately goes like this.:

Wake up around 8:30 in the morning - I know we are such slackers but we stay up late because we just can't go to sleep - it still feels like the middle of the afternoon. Oh and we are completely hooked on watching 24 - this from two people who never watch tv. It's bad. We have fallen hard...

So, then we get ready, eat breakfast (usually a boiled egg and toast), do some bible study and reading and return a few emails.

Around noon we leave to eat lunch - which sometimes is a slow process. We stop at a market and grab a few things that Katya has requested. We take her some food and entertainment, hang out for an hour or two and then head to get coffee and on to the orphanage.

At the orphanage we just follow Nastya around to whatever the afternoon class of the day is taking place (soccer, dance, music, or homework time). We talk to her during all this because it is fairly laid back in the afternoon. For example if a child doesn't feel like p.e. then he or she just doesn't show up or just watches the other kids. This would never fly in America but I guess in the orphanage there is no one really to enforce involvement. So after some time with Nastya, we call a taxi and return to the city. We eat dinner, return to our apartment, blog (like now), email, skype, and watch 24.

Hard life huh?!?

Which leads me to the 'eye of the storm'. Before getting here I think things were about as crazy as they have ever been in our lives. Just for an idea, we hosted the girls for a month - during which Zach's grandpa died, my sister and parents traveled to Ethiopia to adopt my nephew and we kept my niece for a few weeks; we moved our business office; we moved much of our household items (we are kind of in between houses now); before moving our things we completely remodeled our new home and developed the land around our new home, including Zach putting in the septic pretty much himself; my Dad had a heart attack days before we left; the kids started school; and if there were other major events I honestly have blocked them out!! So then we arrive in Ukraine and the first week or so was pretty busy. But now for at least 10 days we are alone with time to talk, take walks, eat out, watch movies, pray, read, make plans for when we get home, and just love on tons of kids. Of course we miss our children at home and the rest of our family, but I would be lying if I didn't say that this is truly a vacation for us and we are loving most every minute.

Shortly after we arrived here, Zach and I were talking and he said, "You know our lives are like a hurricane lately but right now we are in the eye of the storm and it is sure peaceful - although deceptive!" It feels very strange, having come out of an incredibly busy time and about to go into unchartered terrirtory with two new children and homeschooling them, to have such a quiet few weeks. We fear that we may be getting a bit spoiled! But we just know that it is God's grace to give us this time to refresh, to enjoy one another, and to prepare our hearts for the next chapter in this exciting journey. It will definitely be the hardest but we are not afraid. After all God has carried us through so far, we have no doubt that He will continue to do so, one day at a time.

Update on Katya: Thank you all so much for the encouraging comments and prayers. Melanie thank you for the encouragement about sometimes being right where you need to be even when it seems otherwise. You know we have been praying that God would help prepare her heart to leave and maybe this is what she needed. Just to clarify, she says daily that she wants to go to America and is so happy about it all, but there is definitely going to be a loss (especially for her) when she leaves her country, culture, language, friends, and caregivers. As far as her health - she is still fine today and we hope she will be back by Saturday or Sunday. We have had some nice alone time with her in the waiting room of the hospital at least! Our hands are just about dried out and starting to crack from all the Purell we keep using!! No paranoi here!

Hospital Stay...

2008-10-16T02:46:00.000-07:00

Katya is currently in the hospital. Nope don't be too concerned. That sounds bad but actually it is quite ridiculous. Almost all the kids in her group/class had coughs and a general head cold when we got here. Nastya seemed like she really felt bad. Katya complained of a sore throat and coughed some. But she didn't have a fever and was dancing, running, laughing, and acting like she felt great. No signs of being very sick but still complaining. Well, the day of court she told us that the nurse was sending her to the hospital the next day to be 'treated' because of her sore throat. She still seemed fine. So not only did she get sent to the hospital but she has to stay for 5 to 7 days. We are pretty frustrated about this. Not only is she stuck in this creepy hospital in a room with over 7 over girls (most of whom do appear quite ill and will probably give her something), but we have to go up there everyday. It is quite a far walk and adds several hours onto our daily travels. And it is not a fun place to visit - smelly, diseases floating around, just wierd - it almost feels like being in the twilight zone or something. And I actually really like to go to hospitals in the US.

The worst part of it all is that she does NOT need to be there but now that she is there they won't let her leave until her 'treatment' is done. I shudder to think of all diseases she is being exposed to! I think the rest of the kids have figured out that this is what happens if you complain too much, but I guess she didn't realize that this was what would happen. I can't even imagine how long they would keep you if had something seriously wrong like surgery or having a baby. One person was shocked when we said that even when you have a baby in America you only stay one or two nights!! It is pretty crazy. Praying that they will let her out soon so that she can spend a few good days with her friends and can say her goodbyes before we leave. We really wanted this week to be a time of closure for her as she prepares to leave this chapter of her life behind. All venting about the hospital aside - the only thing that really saddens us is this lost time for her to spend with her friends.

"There's No Place Like Home!"

2008-10-13T10:54:00.000-07:00

This is what Nastya said just after the girls were proclaimed our children!!

Kateryna Grace Potts

and

Anastasiya Joy Potts

What an amazing, beautiful, glorious day this has been! Court went great although I must admit that we were both very nervous :) We couldn't help it - we suddenly realized the magnitude of this moment and couldn't help but being nervous. It didn't help matters that we couldn't understand what was being said until after N translated it for us. And we weren't completely sure what should be said or not said... But I guess we did alright! The judge was very kind and even cracked some jokes. In other cirmcumstances we might have cracked a few back but we were too worried that a wrong word might send a wrong message or be offensive.

So, an overview: We sat outside the small courtroom awaiting our turn for about 20 minutes. We were called in and told where to sit (one row up and to the right of the girls). N sat behind us and the orphanage director and adoption inspector sat behind her. There was one judge, two jurors (normal citizens), and a court reporter. Official things were done like looking over passports, verifing the the identy of us, N, the Orphanage Director, and the Regional Adoption Inspector. The judge then orally reviewed our case file, including our entire dossier as well as local reports about the girls. Then Zach was asked to stand and present to the court for why he was willing and able to adopt these girls. He stated that were financially able and physically able to provide a loving home for these girls. He discussed that we love them and that we desire to provide them a loving family. He talked about our great extended family support and expressed our commitment to maintain the girls dual citizenship and file yearly reports. He ended with saying that we planned to help the girls maintain their use of their language so that they can one day return and visit if they so choose. I think everyone really appreciated that. Then it was my turn. The judge jokingly asked me if my husband forced me to sign the paperwork :) I said of course not. He asked what else I had to add and I talked about what a blessing these girls were to us and how thankful we were for the opportunity bring them into our family. I got a little tongue tied for a minute and continued with our plans to educate the girls and care for their needs. The judge asked me if I wanted girls since we already had two boys and only one girl. I took him seriously and said that we would have been happy with boys too but just love these girls. Then I realized he was joking when he asked when we were returning for another boy! I felt kinda silly :)

So as we are sitting here writing this post, I am saying, "Man we really should have prepared more last night and had better answers - we were kind of unsure about what to say." Zach responds, "This is just like in college - when you made a 90 you wanted a 100 and I was just happy to get the 89.5 needed to ensure an A!" Okay so maybe I am a perfectionist and he's a slacker!!! Ha!

Back to court: The judge and the jurors leave to discuss the verdict. Don, ton, ta, don... They return!! Okay, I know in my head that it will be fine but I'm still thinking, "What if we gave a wrong answer and they don't like us!" So, he begins to read the court judgment. It goes through all the same stuff again - our family, our finances, our application to adopt, etc. Then, and this was the hardest part where I began to really tear up, he said things about their family history and ended with, "And no one in Ukraine wants them." My heart broke completely and I cried out silently, "We want you!! We want you!!"

We said our thank yous to the judge and others and headed out. We spoke for awhile to the orphanage director, who we found to be a gracious, kind man. We told him what an excellent job he is doing running the orphanage (and this is so true) and he responded with, "Thank you, but there is no replacement for a loving family." That's when Nastya chimed in, "There is no place like home." Oh how right you are sweet girl!

Tomorrow, Tomorrow...

2008-10-12T10:04:00.000-07:00

The sun'll come out Tomorrow,

Bet your bottom dollar,

That tomorrow

There'll be sun!

Oh, yes tomorrow is finally really here!!! We have court at four (our time). There are some last minute paperwork things that must come together in the morning but N is confident that everything will be in place. Can I hear an Amen!!! It is so surreal that tomorrow we truly go to court and legally become the parents of Kateryna and Anastasiya. I don't think they really realize what a big day this is - the big day for them will be when they leave the orphanage for the last time. That will be their tomorrow and in a way it will Zach's and mine as well. It is hard to have children that we literally have no control or protection of at this point. I can't stand many of the freedoms at the orphanage or the media (which thankfully isn't nearly as bad as some people have found in other orphanages) that they are exposed to. We can't wait to be able to love, protect, guide, and teach them as their parents. For now, we just get to visit, but it is their turf and it is counterproductive to give directives of any sort because we have no recourse if they do not listen. Suggestions and requests are usually met with willingness, but we know that requests such as - please do not walk to the market without an adult - will not be met with obedience. We feel that it would actually hurt our authority to tell them to do something that we can't enforce. There are teachers and caregivers with very different rules (or lack thereof) and we are not in a position to challenge the status quo. It is difficult though, to realize that our children are doing things that we do not think are safe or good for them. If all goes well tomorrow, then only 10 more days until they truly will be ours forever!!!

An endearing story to share... One sweet girl - Alena, who is Zach's spanish speaking translator friend - actually told him that she had prayed to Jesus about her bad hair cut and that He made her feel better (she was so sad that they gave her a bad haircut the other day). She then said that the music at the orphanage is 'no good' and that she would prefer the songs about God that they sing at Awanas and church. Wow! So awesome to see one out of many who has somehow 'gotten' it. This girl is such a gem. Pray for Alena's faith to continue to grow and for her future to be protected. Her faith seems very genuine and she seems much more confident and emotionally stable than most of the children. She longs to leave the orphanage and go to a real family. She has a 'host mom' in Spain, but since this woman is single, she cannot adopt her (as per the law of Ukraine). But obviously she has benefited from the hosting times and received hope and faith from her family in Spain.

Today we went to church (tserkva) again and what a blessing it was. Shortly after arriving (we were a little late due to taxi trouble), they sang "How Great Thou Art". What an incredible joy it was to worship with this church body in another language. Zach and I read our bibles during the sermons (yes, 2 sermons) and it was truly a refreshing, encouraging time! I prayed that this church body would truly be a light to the children of the orphanage and that they would not tire in their ministry to them. I sat behind two great foster families that we have been praying for and was overjoyed to actually see their families and their children. The world has truly become smaller!

And I was comforted by this verse this morning:

2 Corinthians 4:16- 18 "Therefore we do not lose heart. Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day. For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory, while we do not look at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen. For the things which are seen are temporary, but the things which are not seen are eternal."

Happy Birthday Nastya!!

2008-10-10T11:43:00.000-07:00

You are 10 today sweet girl. How I wish that I could have celebrated every birthday and milestone with you. How I wish that I had sung you happy birthday every October 10th and been a part of every one of your first 10 years. What was I even doing 10 years ago? Well I had a new baby but had no idea that another of my children was being born half a world away. I would not know you for almost 10 years. But we can both have peace despite the loss because God knew you. He created you perfectly and knew every day of yours before there was one. He was preparing me for you long before I knew you and preparing you for me. His plan was and is always filled with hope and a future. Never forget that. Your Father always has been and will be your father in heaven. He has never left you even when the darkness has overwhelmed you, He was there carrying you through it. And today Daddy and I celebrated your life and your future with you. I pray that your day was blessed and that you know how very much you are loved and cherished. We love you, Momma and Daddy

Today it took from about 11 in the morning until about 2 to accomplish buying two small chocolate cakes, some fruit, candy, bottled water, and finding taxis to the market and then to the orphanage. We traveled less than 8 miles in all! Everything takes 10 times longes here with long lines (one for fruit, one for candy, one for checkout) and humorous attempts to find and communicate with taxi drivers who speak another language. It goes like this - we flag a taxi, show him the written address (in Ukrainian) where we wish to go, offer him about 20 grivna and he says no 30 grivna. Well that is way too much - 20 is actually too much. So we start again. It is best to find a metered taxi but to do this we must call and that is interesting with my limited ukrainian. It sounds like "Preevit, Ya hochu taxi e dee tu dee hotel Ukraine, spa see ba." Translation, "Hi, I would like a taxi to come to Hotel Ukraine, please." Half the time it works and half the time they hang up. But we eventually get to where we need to go - usually just later than sooner. Today, we were tired and a little stressed by the time we arrived at the orphanage for the party scheduled in the girls classroom with their whole class. We were loaded down with goods that we had to smuggle in without other children seeing what we had. No easy task. But we were smooth! We made it just in time to set up and put candles on the cake before the kids came running in. It was fun and we had fruit, cake, ballons, pens and lipgloss for everyone. Big hits! Nastya shared her birthday celebration with a friend who also had a birthday today. I think it was better for all the attention to not be on her, as they are not used to being singled out. It all went well and then we went outside to play water balloon tosses. All in all a very fun day. But you know what?!? - Throwing a birthday party in Ukraine is just as exhausting for mom as doing one in America!!!

Finally a few pictures!

2008-10-09T23:28:00.000-07:00

A few of the girls took a short break during their soccer (fut-ball) game to pose for a photo. How cute are they!!
Here are the girls with their good friend Tanya. She is such a sweetheart! Is my suitcase big enough?!?

This statue of Lenin is right in the center of the city, in front of an old Soviet building. Why this statue is still here is quite a mystery...
A gorgeous Ukrainian Orthodox church first built in mid 1800s

We are still doing well - we will find out for sure today, but court is tentatively scheduled for Monday sometime... It seems we've been here awhile but really that is pretty fast. Nastya and Katya are enjoying us visiting everyday. We play hours of Uno, have Ukrainian lessons from some of the girls, give English lessons in return, play silly games outside (such as a Ukrainian version of duck-duck-goose and a shoe game where we all exchange shoes and chase each other), just hang out and talk, take walks (yesterday we helped their group clean up trash in front of the orphanage), hand out candy, and just whatever comes up.

Airing The Laundry!!

2008-10-05T10:47:00.000-07:00

Here is what a dryer looks like in Ukraine. Oh how modern conveniences are so often taken for granted. Well, no more!!

And here is what the washing machine looked like last night. We have been unable to find and apartment yet, so we are in a hotel and the washateria was closed for a few days. But even if it was open, there are no dryers! This clothes has been hanging for 24 hours and is still very wet!

Well, on another note, we went to the Baptist Church here today and it was such a sweet time. It was awesome to worship with people in another language. Worship has no language and there truly is a unity that comes from sharing hope and salvation in Christ. Zach and I felt such a bond with these people that we couldn't talk to and could hear their hearts if not their words. It was very sincere and the music was beautiful. The girls were there along with others from the internot. Some ladies from the church go and get them in a van. So they sat with us - or sometimes on us!! Some of the boys were pretty loud and I gently told one to quiet down and he looked at me and said, "You are not my mama" - valid point....

We were standing outside afterwards and realized that no one was still there who spoke English. We didn't know how to call a cab and explain to come pick us up. So, we went up to some young girls and they spoke enough English that we could ask them to explain to the cab to come to the church. I think they thought it was pretty funny that these stupid Americans were handing them their cell phone and acting out what we needed!!! Never a dull moment! Although crazy, it is really pretty safe. We feel fine as long as we stay in normal areas - just like any city.

Later this afternoon we went to the orphanage. Nastya was gone for quite awhile - they said that she walked to the market with some other kids and an adult but no one knew who. We were mildly concerned but figured a teacher was with her. Well after about an hour it came out that they went to a market very far away(like maybe five or more miles one way) AND that there was no adult with them. NOT OKAY!!! We were so worried but what could we do? No one knew which path they took or how to look for them. The caretakers didn't seem all that concerned. It was with a great sigh of relief that we saw her returning finally. She was in trouble with the caregivers, and was a little freaked out herself. I don't think she will do that again. Just pray for their protection - not just N&K but all the children.

It is hard to decribe what this does to my heart to be here with these children. I was told what to expect, but nothing can really prepare for the heartache that comes from spending time with these children that yearn for a family. I know that there are several others I could love. I will pray for them diligently and work to find them families. I know that the Lord loves them more than I ever could and that somehow, He will not forsake them. But what does that mean? I don't know - except that I believe that there is hope for each one. Today I kept hearing the song that goes something like this: "Everyone needs compassion, the kindness of a savior, the hope of nations. Everybody needs forgiveness, grace and mercy..." None of us are without need and none of us are without hope. I pray that each one of them (and myself more and more) 'tastes and sees that the Lord is good.' That they know the plans that He has for them. That they know salvation in Jesus. I thank and praise Him that at least at this orphanage they are told about Jesus and given the chance to go to church and bible clubs. I thank Him that He has sent loving people to be His hands and feet to some of these children. I praise Him that because of His work at least two are 'solitary that He is placing in a family'... It is the Lord who has done this in our lives and theirs.

Deuteronomy 10:18 "He defends the cause of the fatherless and the widow, and loves the alien, giving him food and clothing."

Psalm 68:5"A father to the fatherless..."

1 Samuel 2:8 "He raises the poor from the dust and lifts the needy from the ash heap; he seats them with princes and has them inherit a throne of honor."

Meeting the Girls...

2008-10-04T09:00:00.000-07:00

Wow it is so hard to sit down and write about the past 48 hours. So much has happenned. So many emotions. So much driving. So little sleep. I will try.

Let's see. We woke up at 5:00 yesterday (Friday) and N picked us up. We headed to Zhytomyr - about 1 1/2 hours away. N's husband was speeding on the way - very common - and got stopped. One option was to pay 10 grivna ($2) to the police but the other was better, apparently. Her husband works for the governmentt - parliament I think - so he just showed his papers and off we went :) So finally we arrived in Zhytomyr and headed to the adoption inspector. She knew of the girls and were happy that we were here to adopt them. She signed the necessary papers and finally headed to the orphanage. It is about 10 minutes from the city. N had never been to this one before, so we got a bit lost. They just ask whoever happens to be on the side of road and will do a 180 in the middle of the road - no problem. You run into quite some characters asking for directions. We were all laughing hysterically during all that but getting weary as well. Finally we were there. N went in while we waited in the car and watched a few kids coming and going. Finally we were called in to the director's office. He seems very kind and very quickly gave his blessing for us to proceed and for us to visit the girls whenever we like. As we were standing in his office - totally unexpectedly - in bursts Katya! No warning. Amazingly Zach got photos! She lept into my arms saying "Mama, Mama" many times. She was nervous at the same time. I'm sure it was overwhelming for her. As quickly as she came, she left - to go get Nastya. So Nastya runs in a few minutes later and repeats the same thing with Katya right behind her. It was crazy but wonderful. So strange to be here - on their turf! They are so precious in their school uniforms and big bows in their hair.

After a short meeting with the nurse about their medical history, they immediately led us around the school area to tour their classrooms and meet their friends. Within minutes, they introduced us to Masha and Tanya and Galyna and Olya and asked us to adopt them all. There are no word to describe all my feelings - joy to see them, to finally be in this place about to bring home our girls; heartbreak to have to leave the other kids; sadness to take them away from what has been their home for a year and a half - to cause them more pain even though it is for much good - please read this post from another family that is here now; frustration at not being able to do more; intense pain for all they have had to endure already...so much more.

So after touring the school, seeing them practice dance and music for a performance for teachers day (it took place after we left yesterday), walking outside on the playground area, and meeting so many children, we headed back to Zhytomyr to take the next step with the paperwork. While we had played with the kids, N had been working out paperwork with the director and orphanage lawyer. Now it had to be notarized and taken to the court lawyer to be processed before 4:00. Not an easy task since the first notary asked for Zach and my Ukraine tax id numbers?!? What?! Of course she knew we were Americans. So wierd. So then we looked for another with about a million attempts at directions and 180 degree turns in the middle of the streets. I was getting very tired and so was N (she has a cold during all this). Finally, we succeeded and even got the paperwork to the right lawyer on time. Whew!!

Now the next adventure...finding a place to stay. Not easy here. In most regions there are plenty of apartments for rent by the week but no one knew of any here. So we checked out the three hotels. The first - The Dodo (bird) Hotel - was extremely nice and the price reflected this. The next was medium but fairly full and the only rooms were one that reeked of smoke and another that was on the sixth floor. No problem except no elevator :) Well we said we needed to work out!! Also no fridge or kitchen. So then we checked out the last one - no words for that one, but we didn't bother to look at the rooms. We returned to the middle hotel and proceeded to carry the luggage up 6 flight of stairs. We will have to move out in a few days to somewhere else. Around this time it all hit me. I had been in a great mood and loving every second, but all at once the emotions of the past few days combined with extreme exhaustion hit like a ton of bricks. I started crying in front of sweet N. And she was so kind it made me cry more. Okay I sound completely crazy now. But I just can't explain it - it came out of nowhere and I was powerless to stop it. I assured N that I was not really upset - just needed some time to process and some sleep and some food. She took us to a great restaurant and then I went home and crashed.

It did the trick. I felt great today and had a fabulous visit to the orphanage. We stopped by the market, via taxi, on the way and got fruit and candy and the shampoo Katya asked for. It was gorgeous outside today and we spent about 5 hours with the girls and their friends. We were allowed to go up to the girls' room and spend some time there. It is actually very cozy and has plenty of room. They have many of the things that we had sent back with them. That was encouraging to see. Then we headed outdoors and Zach played some basketball with some of the older boys. They were pretty impressed :) And the girls kept same, "Oh Daddy - bravo!" It was so much fun - just hanging out and playing and talking. Some of the kids know English quite well and translate for each other. One girl speaks excellent Spanish (she has been hosted in Spain several times) and so she translates through Zach with the other kids and then he translates to me. I'm sure nothing is lost :) They all want to show off their talents and just have approval. They want hugs and they want to talk. They also appreciate candy and fruit :) The boys want to wrestle. They all want their pictures taken. They are so precious it just makes my heart ache for them. I can't imagine how I will feel by the time we leave. What an amazing blessing this time is even if it is so emotional - we love every second (almost!)!!!

Kraseewee Daine!! (Beautiful Day)

2008-10-02T12:19:00.000-07:00

Today was incredible. We went to a yummy lunch with N and her husband. The place was very nice with wood beams and granite rock throughout. I can't say enough about how impressed we are with her. She is so caring about the children and about our even insignificant needs. If anyone reading would like a referral for a great facilitator, email me and I would be happy to share her contact info. I seriously think we have one of the top facilitators in Ukraine. Thank God for leading us to her. Not only is she very enjoyable to spend time with, she is also extremely honest and well-respected at the SDA. She cares about getting us through the process fast and despite the fact that she was feeling sick today, she didn't complain a bit and went the extra mile to get us things that we needed. She speaks impeccable English as well as several other languages.

Okay, so on to what you all are waiting for...The Appointment.

So we arrived a little early and stood inside the iron gate in the courtyard and met another american adoptive couple outside. (Zach said in his best East Texan accent, how ya'll doing and the answered, so we knew they must be American) They had just had their appointment and we enjoyed talking about the adoption process. Finally after an hour or so it was our turn. N motioned us in and we walked up the narrow staircase to the small office. I suddennly felt a bit nervous that we were about to be ushered into our big court appointment. It turned out to be a small room with the SDA psychologist/social worker. She is a younger woman in her 30s with a warm personality who made us very comfortable. She asked us how about our hosting trips went and how the girls adjusted. We told her about Nastya missing Katya at Christmas and about how well things went this summer. We told her how much we love the girls. She asked for pictures and we showed her pictures on the laptop. We talked empathetically about each picture - with my parents, swimming, riding horses, family pics, etc. She said we were young to have three kids already. We agreed :) She commented on how small Nastya is and how fast she will grow once she goes home with us. She signed the referral letter right then and told us to adopt them fast and get them home :) And that was that! So easy!!! The SDA file had very little information about their background but N said we would find out more in Zhytomyr. We did see some younger pictures of the girls but not any younger than the first picture that we have of them. I was hoping that somehow they had a younger picture...

Okay so here are some of the pictures of the gorgeous city of Ukraine. We are loving our time here and our time together. And tomorrow we go to see the girls. We can't wait!!

We made it!!

2008-10-02T03:10:00.000-07:00

After about 24 hours of travel we finally arrived in Kiev yesterday afternoon. The flights were awesome - big high five to Lufthansa airlines!! We had an extra seat on the big flight and the seats in economy were super comfy. The food was good too. We had a 4 hour layover in Dusseldorf, Germany and being the adventurers that we are, we decided to get our passports stamped and leave the airport for a quick taxi ride to the city. It was beautiful and we enjoyed a very yummy breakfast at a quaint little German coffee shop. We made it back with plenty of time to spare. When we arrived in Kiev, it was very crowded and not the cleanest conditions at the airport. Our facilitator, N, had run into traffic and was late but I had forgot to print her phone number so we couldn't call without getting to internet. It was a little nerve-wrackng for about 30 minutes as we tried to protect our luggage and looked for N. We couldn't find internet at the airport and were about to try again, when she came. It wasn't all that long and just part of the adventure :) We really like her a lot and she is very on top of things. For example, our appointment is today at 4:00, so yesterday we went to the SDA and she requested that they have our referral letter ready to go so that we could go on to our region right after the appointment. So they typed it up (since we already know who the girls are) and will sign it after our appointment. That will save us at least a whole day - maybe more due to the weekend coming up. Then she took us to several internet stores and helped negotiate this wireless internet card that I am now using in our apartment.

Oh, that brings me to the apartment. It is cute and quaint and roomy. I was singing the praises of it until this morning when I got up (after 10 lovely hours of sleep) to make coffee in the coffee maker that I brought. I connected it to the converter and turned it on. The lights flashed, I heard a clicking noise, and that was that. It blew a fuse in the converter. So, we replaced the fuse and tried again. Same thing. Those who know my love of coffee can imagine the panic I was now in. I mean just the fact that I brought a small coffee maker from the US gives you an idea... I thought I had it made with my coffee pot and converters.

So and I decided to take a shower. Bad idea. First there was no hot water b/c we didn't know to plug in the water heater last night. After freezing and jumping back out, I waited a bit for the water to heat. Then there was NO water at all!! Eventually it came back on, but there was no time to wait for heating, so I shivered through an incredibly cold shower. At least I was awake :) Who needs coffee when you have cold showers?!? Zach put his Aggie engineering to work and proceeded to boil water to pour through the coffee pot and I had my coffee after all. Day saved :) Yea Zach!!

So now we sit and wait for N to arrive and take us to lunch and to the appointment. I'm really not that nervous but I'm sure I will be once we are there.

A little about Kiev ~ It is beautiful!!! It is clean and the architecture is amazing. Independence Square is so impressive with gorgeous old buildings and cobblestone roads. Beautiful domes on buildings and lots of granite and rock arches. The streets are clean and nice and there is an abundance of nice restaurants and shopping. Besides the difficulties of this morning, we are certainly not roughing it!! Of course outside the main areas it is very rundown and the apartment buildings look to be in very bad condition with broken windows, ect. The two public bathrooms I have attempted to enter are more dirty than I can put into words here. People told me, but really nothing quite prepared me for that experience!

I will try to post pictures soon, but so far we have been pretty busy!

Leavin On A Jet Plane..

2008-09-28T20:50:00.000-07:00

...We're ready to go (well almost)...don't know when we'll be back again!

All very true!

We leave the house about 6:00 tomorrow morning - dawn will be breaking...

Today has been a flurry of activity getting things finalized. I hope I'm not forgetting to do anything...

We had our last conversation from the US with Nastya and Katya on Saturday! That was so fun to hear their voices and they asked us to write them letters and to send Uno :) Shhh...we have decided to surprise them rather than telling them that we are coming!! I can't wait to see their faces!

My Dad is doing amazing. Thank you to all who have prayed for him. It is truly a miracle that he is actually just fine. Because they got to him so quickly, very minimal damage was done and besides a few meds and healthy habits - he does not need any surgery. He is home and cleared to work and play golf :) Amazing.

Well, I guess that's it until we are in Ukraine. Wow!!!

My Dad

2008-09-25T18:11:00.001-07:00

This morning as I was spending a little qt with Ben - taking a walk and then swinging him on the tree swings - my sister comes racing up to us in her car, jumps out, and says - "Come on now, Dad's having a heart attack." What?!? This happens to other people. This can't be really happening.

My phone was not working - of all times - so she had to come find me. I swooped up Ben, left him with Jason (my brother-in-law), and we raced to the hospital. It turned out that my dad was having some strange symptoms this morning - back pain, jaw pain, nausea, and right shoulder pain. He mentioned this to my mom as he was about to leave for work and she just had an intuition that something serious was going on although at the moment it didn't seem that serious. I mean, we just moved our office and he had been doing a lot of lifting and hanging cabinets - so it would be normal to be a bit sore. But she just felt that he needed to be checked out. She is not usually an alarmist. Well they left for the ER and on the way, things started getting worse and by the time they arrived and hooked him up to the EKG, he was having a full-blown heart attack. They were able to slow it down with meds very quickly and within 45 minutes he was airflighted to an amazing heart hospital in San Antonio. My mom, my sis, and I raced over there and got lost on the way. The fear of the unknown during that time is hard to describe. By the time we arrived, they had already put in a stint and he was SO much better. His color was better and he seemed much calmer. I think they said that he has very minimal damage and at this time does not need surgery, which is just miraculous considering how bad the blockage in a major artery was. Incredible how quickly those stints work - I had no idea. Once the immediate fear was past, I was very intrigued with how it worked.

Praise God that things went as they did. Praise God that my mom listened to the warnings that the Lord sent her. Praise God that my dad was with my mom when this happened. I have seen way too clearly how small differences could have made for very different outcomes. I know that if things had gone different, God would still be good and would still be sovereign and that regardless there is hope and grace... But, I am so very thankful that today, his life was spared, and it was not his time to go to heaven. I will never understand why God allows things to go the way they do in good and bad times, but I will never forget what I once was told. "When you can't understand the hand of God, trust the heart of God." In other words, God is good - all the time.

I also know something else. I love my daddy. I just saw in an instant what a wonderful man he is and what he means to me. He does so much for his wife and his children and his grandchildren. He has used his gifts to create a beautiful haven (well several actually) that bless his family and many others. He has a kind, giving heart. He has a desire to introduce others to Jesus. He has a heart for prayer. He has been such a wonderful mentor and partner to his two son-in-laws. He is a wonderful grandpa who has taught his grandkids countless life lessons and created precious memories of tractor rides, pancakes, golf lessons, Aggie games, swimming lessons, trips around town and oh so much more... My dad is not perfect - but who is? But when you look at his life and the family he has led and the choices that have defined him, you can most definitely see the wonderful man he is. And I'm thankful that he will have more time to enjoy his family and us him. So Dad, don't worry about a thing and just enjoy the beauty around you. God has given you more days and I am thankful for each one. Love you Daddy.

Psalm 91: 12-14

So teach us to number our days,
That we may present to You a heart of wisdom.

Do return, O LORD; how long will it be?
And be sorry for Your servants.

O satisfy us in the morning with Your lovingkindness,
That we may sing for joy and be glad all our days.

GOING TO UKRAINE!!!!

2008-09-23T13:52:00.000-07:00

OCTOBER 2nd 2008

THAT IS OUR OFFICIAL APPOINTMENT DATE!!!

Whirlwind.

Joy.

Excitment.

Thrilling.

Confusion.

Exhaustion.

Did I mention excitement?!?

I have felt all those emotions and many more in the past 24 hours. Yes we did find out Monday - it just took a few days to have time to sit down and type this. Praise God that there were no problems with the change of appointment date! We continue to see His hand in this process in so many ways and although this week is a flurry of activity with getting ready to leave and finalizing things here - it has once again been incredible to see how He keeps providing in little and big ways. Things are falling into place that I could not have orchestrated and wonderful people have been so very helpful and supportive. From free antibiotics from our doctor, to an amazing travel agent that saved us lots of money, to the most wonderful family in the whole world, to work things for Zach coming together, to a sweet offer of a coming home shower for the girls, to a vet who was able to squeeze in my sick dog :( yesterday...I could go on and on!

We are leaving next Tuesday morning. We can't wait! At this point I can't wait to climb onto that plane and get out a great book I've been saving and just sit and read for a few hours. I LOVE airplanes and airports. Just booking our airfare was exciting and especially things like connections in Germany and Chicago - super cool! I'm like a kid when it comes to airports. Now, I may be singing a different tune by the end of the long travel but right now I am giddy!!

But also very busy and very sad to leave the kids. Wow the emotions fluctuate from happy to sad in a moment when I think of leaving them. That will definitely be the hardest part. And at night when/if I think of all I still need to do - I get a little stressed. Or like last night when we were replacing a broken stove, my dog that I've had since before children came down with something bad going one with one eye (sunken in all the sudden), to a toilet overflowing in a major way, to having a bit of a cold, to a list 10 miles long - I became a bit stressed for a little while... But you know what - I seriously don't have time to be stressed - if I do I will waste precious time. So no stress for me!! Remind me of that at 11:00 tonight :)

More soon!! Did I happen to say that we're excited!?!?!

New Appointment Soon!!!

2008-09-17T18:31:00.000-07:00

Wow, the last two days have been hard to not know what was going on! After briefly talking to our facilitator, N, on Monday and discussing the need for a new appointment, I expected to hear from her by Tuesday morning. Well, I heard nothing and when I tried to call the connection was horrible and I couldn't hear her. I was getting a little nervous and second guessing our decision not to jump on a plane, etc. But really that would have been impossible to leave with less than 24 hours notice with three children to prepare childcare for and many other things to wrap up.

So, we agreed that it was the right choice, but still I wondered if maybe something had gone wrong. So finally this morning I called N again and thankfully her phone was working - she had been in an area with no phone and no internet. She explained that all was fine, that she talked with the deputy director of the SDA and that the appointment would be the first week of October. We will not know the exact day until Monday. So while I am anxious to book airfare, I am so relieved to know that it was not a problem to change the date. And now we can get everything ready and head out in about two weeks!!! How incredibly exciting!! Hopefully a firm date on Monday!

Sort Of Have A Date...

2008-09-15T19:07:00.000-07:00

Well, we got a crazy email today from our facilitator saying that we have an appointment at the SDA on Thursday! Yep, that would be in three days folks. Basically that would mean we would have to leave tomorrow. Not possible of course. Our facilitator realized this and said that she feels very confident that she can change the date to at least two weeks from now. I asked if we could maybe have three weeks since she has to change it anyways, but she is not sure and said to be ready to leave in two weeks... We'll know more tomorrow.

So, I think God must have a sense of humor with this one :) I mean - I wrote yesterday (see post below) that I was trusting Him with whatever date we were given and this is true. Actually, except for a very fast heartrate when I first read the email, I was quite certain that it would work out. I imagined two weeks being the absolute shortest notice that we would have and that even that would be highly unlikely. But now two weeks seems like quite a bit of time when we were looking at one day! If at all possible we would have thrown stuff into a suitcase, found tickets and left. But it just isn't. I'm not sure what happenned for us to be given such short notice but it would be impossible to leave so quickly with three children to get ready, packing, and Zach's work that needs to be wrapped up before he leaves. We hope to hear what is going on tomorrow.

So, if you read this tonight, please be in prayer that our facilitator will be shown favor with her request to change our date tomorrow morning (around midnight or so if you live in Texas) and that the date will be at just the right time. She was not concerned but you just never know (obviously from today's events). We have some other things going on that we can't talk about on here but that makes leaving even more difficult right now. We can't wait to go get the girls but need to get a few things prepared to facilitate a smooth transistion when they come home. Please just pray for the Lord to give us the time we need to do what truly needs to be done and for the wisdom to leave the rest for later. Pray that Zach will have the time to accomplish what needs to be done at work so that he can leave with a peaceful heart.

Hopefully more news tomorrow...

A quick conversation...

2008-09-13T07:46:00.001-07:00

We were finally able to call the girls this morning!!! It was shorter than expected because Alla's phone quit working in the middle, but so sweet to talk to them. I didn't realize until today how much English they had learned - we relied on Alla so much less than we had before to communicate, and they actually understood and answered me in English about basic things. It was so wonderful to hear their voices and to just 'reconnect' a bit. It did make me miss them even more though and I wonder if it is the same for them... They asked again when we were coming and again we said we didn't know but that we hoped it would be soon...

Which leads me to some thoughts that have been rolling around in my head... Obviously we have not heard yet about our appointment and I have to confess that I was stressing out a bit last week over when that might be. My emotions have felt torn between not wanting to leave my babies here and needing to get quite a few things done before leaving, to being ready to hop on the first plane and go get the girls. My old controlling, planning nature kicked in, and I began to imagine different timeline scenarios and what would work best and what just wouldn't work at all for the timing of travel (it is a lot of things to arrange to be gone for so long with work for Zach, the kids left with my parents, pets, my office work, and some other big things going on right now).

However, the Lord has once again calmed my anxious heart and showed me it is so silly for me to be thinking like this. I am worrying over something I have absolutely no control and He sees all the details and knows when the right time is. He sees the needs of all of us, of Allee, Jadon, and Ben, of Katya and Nastya, and of circumstances that we may never know. He will provide the time for us to do what we need (although I may have to readjust my thoughts on what that truly is), and He will provide for our needs and our children's needs while we are gone.

Hopefully there will be another update soon...I have been told that we should have travel dates by Monday. We are praying for God to handpick those dates in His perfect wisdom!

Guess the Date!!! (And De-Lurking...)

2008-09-04T19:31:00.000-07:00

Okay, we decided to have a little fun during this waiting time... We have been waiting to hear when our SDA appointment in Ukraine will be since we submitted our dossier on August 7th to the SDA. We thought we would hear by now and are starting to get a wee bit impatient. However, it helped that we were very busy with our girls here in August and didn't have much time to dwell on it. It also helps that Kevin and Pam submitted on the same day and haven't heard yet either. I think if it weren't for you guys we would be concerned!! Our facilitator happens to be in the US vacationing and we haven't heard from her for at least a week - hoping for good news soon.

So, in the meantime, leave us a comment with your best guess for when Ukraine will issue us an appointment at the SDA to recieve our referral for the girls. This is the next big step in the process and after we are given that referral, we will go on to the girls' region, accept the refferal and wait for a court date. After court there is a mandatory 10 day wait, during which one or both of us may come home - not sure of the costs of that yet. After that, we have to get a few paperwork things done like medicals and visas I think and then we come home!!!

So, the SDA could be anytime in the next few months - we are told to expect it to be anytime between now (well not for at least a few weeks) and Christmas. We pray that is the case!

And if it's your first time post a comment - just click on the comments tab below and leave a message - pretty easy! We'd love to know who all is reading and appreciate you following our journey!!!

What's your guess?!?

In The Air...

2008-09-03T19:11:00.000-07:00

Well the girls are flying across the ocean as I type this. This is the third plane they have been on today and I hope that they are sleeping right now... As I snuggled, talked and prayed with Allee, Jadon, and Benjamin tonight, it seemed so strange to not be giving back scratches to Nastya and reading with Katya. Every so often today, I have seen something as I cleaned my house (which appeared to have been hit by a hurricane :)) that reminded me of a particular moment or I could almost hear their voices calling me in their adorable English/Ukrainian vocabulary.

Our day started long before anyone should be awake. With just a few hours of sleep, after much packing and children who didn't want to go to bed on their last night, we awoke at 4:00 am. We quickly got ready and loaded the car with five sleepy children and a few suitcases. The stars were beautiful :) The girls were upbeat for most of the way to the airport, and thankfully they didn't experience any motion sickness this time. We were all allowed past security so we ate McDonalds and were quite a sight trailing through the airport - bedhead and all!

The girls continued to say that they didn't want to leave and got emotional over insignificant annoyances...but they were sweet and accepting about it at the same time. Finally we had to say our goodbyes and off they headed. Katya hugged me hard and quietly said, "Thank you Momma."

It is hard to comprehend that we just sent the children, who are the daughters of our hearts if not by law, across the world to a place that they don't want to go. I do think that they will be happy to see their friends and caregivers once they get there and we looked at a bunch of pictures last night of their friends to help them get excited. They do have some close relationships with a few friends and adults there and for that we are so thankful.

I don't know - I thought it would be easier this time than at Christmas because we have a clearer picture now of a hopeful future to be reunited soon. But it wasn't -it was harder. I think because my heart is less guarded this time and they truly feel like our daughters. Which, although difficult, is a blessing that God has already begun that process of knitting our hearts together. Amazing what can happen in three weeks! It has flown by but yet seems a lifetime ago that they arrived. Hopefully time will fly before we ee-dee-tu-dee (go to) Ukraine!

So-lod-kee to-bee snueef sweet girls.

Swimmers!!!

2008-08-31T20:22:00.000-07:00

Oh my!!! Zach taught Katya and Nastya to swim without assistance or life jackets today! This is so amazing considering that when they arrived three weeks ago, we were dealing with near panic attacks every time they entered remotely deep water even with life jackets and adult assistance! They have swam probably half the days that they have been here and have slowly grown more confident. So after church today we went to my parents' house because it is also my birthday :). Zach took all the kids swimming while I got to relax and drink coffee with my mom and sis. After about two hours of being down at the pool, Benjamin ran up and told me that I they had a surprise and that I had to come see!!! I went down and there they were swimming like fish up and down the pool. And as proud as can be :) Bravo girls!! (and Zach!)

My birthday has been wonderful to be able to celebrate it with so many that I love. What a blessing to have such an amazing family. I love you guys! Thanks for making it so special for me. I just feel so loved! It was extra sweet to have Nastya and Katya here too and they just delighted in making me special gifts and even gave me an interesting birthday chant complete with 'ear tugs' this morning...a unique tradition for sure :) What sweethearts!

"When Can I Stay Forever?"

2008-08-26T20:51:00.000-07:00

That is the question I was asked just a few days ago. We were invited to attend a Ukrainian Independence Day celebration on Sunday. It was lots of fun with good food, swimming, and an abundance of translators. All the people were so kind and very excited about our adoption/hosting process.

As we were leaving, I asked Liliya to translate some information to the girls about the upcoming dentist appointments this week. (More on that in a sec) The kids were in the car and it had started to rain. So standing in the rain under an umbrella with her daughter waiting, Liliya patiently translated a what turned into a quite lengthy conversation! What an incredible gift she has been to us! So in the middle of talking about dentists and swimming and random stuff, Katya asks what must have been on her heart and finally she saw a chance to express. Nastya followed that up with "Nastya no hochish internot" (Nastya does not want to go to the orphanage). With hearts melting, we looked at both girls, held their hands and told them that we loved them both very much. We said that if it were up to us they would stay here forever and not leave at all. But that it was not our decision and if we did that we would go to jail. That got a few laughs and they understand. Then we told them we had done everything on our end and that we were just waiting for the governement of Ukraine to tell us when we could come to Ukraine. We told them that we hoped it would be before Christmas. That is all we could give them. This led to a quiet, introspective ride home for Katya and to nightmares that night for Nastya. My heart breaks that they must return.

I followed up that conversation with a little more via the online translator. I told them again how much I loved them and that I could not wait for the day when we can talk more about what we are all thinking. I told them that this was God doing this work in our lives and they wholeheartedly agreed and Katya said that He had given them so much good.

On another note, please pray for me. I am tired. It has been a doozy of a month and the adrenaline is over. The next week seems daunting on an emotional and physical level. Allee and Jadon start school Tuesday and that is also the girls' last day here. Another doozy on timing! It seems that just about every major life event of the past two years is being squeezed into this particular time period. Allee is worried about school and the girls are emotional about leaving. I have much preparation to do on both ends. Oh, did I mention my birthday is Sunday? I want to make this time sweet for all but have many conflicting demands. Pray that God redeems this time and gives me the grace I need.

On yet one more note, we have had some challenges with Katya. She is super sweet and loving one minute and then so pouty the next because perhaps I say that we are going to the park and she would rather swim! Like a 12 year old one second and 2 the next. It's hard to know how to react and how to balance grace and firmness. And then there are little things that are difficult. Particularly when it is time to do anything, sit down at the table, get in the car to go somewhere (even somewhere she wants to go), get ready for bed, etc...she had a gazillion things that she needs to do before doing the thing that we have asked. I am struggling to clearly, patientely and firmly redirect and show her what to do and to realize that anyone needs to have a little time to finish up what they are doing before moving on to the next thing. But this is definitely an area we are praying for wisdom... Of course I guess all this is maybe not so different than our boys but we just know how to deal with these issues with them and I guess because of her age we expect more. But I know I shouldn't. She hasn't had the blessings of godly parental love, training, and example. I guess we are just seeing firsthand some of the struggles that we completely expected (and thankfully not nearly as bad as imagined actually) - this just happens to be reality rather than imagining!

So on to the dentist update. Nastya went last Thursday and did great! She had two teeth pulled (don't worry they were baby teeth that needed to come out) and one filling. She is so brave and just had a few concerns when the drilling started. She was very happy when we told her that new teeth were going to come in where the others were pulled. And she had her first experience with the tooth fairy! She wanted a real live puppy but a tiny, cute pink and purple one along with some gum was okay too :) We go for round two tomorrow...

Today has been an interesting day. We got home from roller skating at 9:00 tonight and with a child who was pouting because she didn't want to leave the skating rink - glad she loved it so much :) Then we couldn't find my beloved 11 year-old golden retriever, Bailey, who had gotten himself stuck in a hole that he had dug for himself in the mud. It took quite awhile with flashlights to find him in the dark yard and while calling him, we woke up a few kids :) It was kind of like 'Shadow' on Homeward Bound. But at least he wasn't hurt!

Learning Together...

2008-08-20T19:24:00.000-07:00

Lamentations 3:22-23 Through the Lord's mercies we are not consumed, Because His compassions fail not. The are new every morning; Great is Your faithfulness. "The Lord is my portion", says my soul, "Therefore I hope in Him!" The Lord is good to those who wait for Him, To the soul who seeks Him. It is good that one should hope and wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord.

Well it has been quite the roller coaster ride for the past few days - some definite hilltops and some definite lows. I of course enjoy blogging about the highs more, but to keep it real and honest to others and because I want this to be an honest journal for our family in the future - I will share a few struggles. It's funny because I started to type this Sunday night and it was pretty negative and I just didn't have the energy to finish. But already I can barely recall those feelings because really it was just a bump in the road and we have already moved on.

Sunday morning was great - the girls love church (especially worship) and enjoyed playing afterward in the gym since we ate lunch there. Then we came home (Zach had to leave to work that afternoon) and I really struggled with obedience issues with Katya. Just simple things - like refusing to turn off the tv, getting fruit without asking (we have told them just to ask first), not eating in the appropriate places, splashing a lot of water in the tub (for the 2nd day in a row), and pouting when corrected. And just working through some slight hurt feelings among the three girls. Not to mention, Ben wouldn't nap and Jadon kept picking on his brother! Did I mention that I had stayed up too late and was tired too!!! Not a good combo and led to a rather overwhelmed and grumpy momma and you know, "If Momma's not happy..."

So that's the bad part - not really all that bad now that it is past!!! Perspective is amazing! But the really amazing part is once again how God supplied for our needs and quite literally poured out His grace on us. All I can say - if you were led to pray for us Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, and today - God heard your prayers and I felt them!!!! The first way that God helped me was through Zach - my sweet, wonderful husband came home and calmly took over - realizing that I needed a break. Then he made time for me to talk with Allee and help her figure out some healthy boundaries and just talk and pray with mom. Much needed for us both. Then he patiently listened to me and didn't correct me in my emotional state but wholeheartedly prayed with me and for me and for our family. He encouraged me to pray and spend some time in the word and to ask for some advice from those who have gone before us in similar journeys. Some have expressed concern that the added stress of adding two new children to our family may place too much stress on our marriage. I can say that without a doubt our love for one another has quadrupled and the stress has thus far done nothing but draw us together and allow us to see God at work in each others' lives. Thank you Lord for my husband.

So then I received some great encouragement from Connie - she adopted 2 girls the same ages as Katya and Nastya about five years ago. I have really appreciated what she shares on her blog and through emails to me. Our talk helped me to be more confident about what approach to take. Thanks Connie for making time to talk and pray for us!!

Then on Monday afternoon we had Liliya come over- the translator that we hooked up with at the pool (or rather that God dropped in our path!!!). We played memory game all together and learned a little English. We talked about the importance of listening and while at first Katya said that she 'did not promise to listen to Momma' :) she truly listened to me and we have seen her really trying and doing so much better. I really expected all this (although in reality I don't always react the way I imagine!) and seriously - this kid has never been able to really trust adults and now here she is in a new family that she can't communicate with and we are telling her that she has to listen to us all the time. I understand her frustration and am very encouraged to see that she has been doing AMAZINGLY well the past few days. I know it will be ups and downs - but with what child is it not? I see enormous potential and hope by the grace of God. So I guess that is why I titled this 'learning together' - I think my expectations were pretty unrealistic on Sunday and I was grumpy which led to further feelings of uncertainty and unwillingness to listen. I was able to talk to her through Liliya and really communicate some much needed conversations, my love for her, my desire to do good for her, and just to laugh together and joke around a bit. So I am learning how to more graciously approach Katya (as well as the others) and having some more clarity and direction about how to best love and train her. This time is so invaluable for us to learn and regroup before they come home forever. We are seeing a few needed changes that are hard to make right now - such as we plan to eliminate all tvs from the house other than the one in the living area and perhaps my bedroom so that it is easier to regulate the amount of movies they watch.

Moving on to Tuesday ~ Zach left very early and came home very late this day. I considered taking everyone to a movie or roller skating or something to just get out of the house. But as I thought about the day, I decided we needed a down day and that if we left, it would be more for me than for them. I also determined to keep them downstairs and with no movies until rest time. Amazingly - it worked! We (all six of us) cooked together, cleaned together, played games together, did an art project that Liliya left, worked on English lessons (Rosetta Stone), and just had a blast! Then they enjoyed a quiet afternoon and Ben even slept!!! I used that time to do some much needed office work. Everyone then got up and we played a few more games and ate dinner. We tidied up once more and were happily on our way to bed by the time Zach came home. How nice that was for him!!! And how thrilled I was to just experience the Lord give me the grace and strength and wisdom to walk through the day with joy.

So that brings us to today - Wednesday. It was Ben's first day at pre-school, Katya's first filling at the dentist (which Liliya helped SO much with by clearly explaining the process and the need for the dental work), and the day that my sister's precious baby boy - Bennet Toufiq - came home from Ethiopia!!! We had a good morning - Zach took Ben to school and Jadon to work with him. We headed to the dentist, calling Liliya on the way for a brief run-through on what to expect again and to discuss the schedule for the rest of the day. Of course they like to know what they are going to be doing the rest of the day and today they had a few choices to make! The dentist appointment went well - it was a deep cavity and while not very painful - it was very frightening for her to hear and feel the drill. She clung to my hand for dear life and a tear or two slid down her cheek, but she bravely remained still and the dentist finished in record time. When it was all over she was confused about the numbness but we told her it would go away. We had Marble Slab to celebrate her great job!!! She told Nastya it is not so bad, which is a good thing since her first appointment (of many unfortunately) is tomorrow morning!! She has to have an extraction - which sounds horrible - but it is really not since it is just a baby tooth that will come out easily due to the bad decay and she will be numb. But her greatest fear is having teeth pulled - they do this commonly in Ukraine when there is bad decay and they don't use anesthetic!! So I have not told her specifically what is being done yet - not sure when to break the news.

Last, but certainly not least!!! BENNET TOUFIQ ROBERTS is HOME!!! Whoop!! It has been a difficult process but it is all forgotten now! He is just about the cutest thing you've ever seen. We had a fun welcome home celebration at the airport - complete with signs and Ethiopian flags! Thanks Becca! He is doing so well and it is so amazing to see how perfectly he fits their family. Check our her blog for pics and more details!!! http://www.edenhorsefarms.blogspot.com/

Okay, if you are even still reading :), sorry for the loooooong post again - but I just have so much to remember right now!

Pure Joy!

2008-08-16T19:50:00.000-07:00

That describes today. We awoke to five happy children, received a phone call that Zach's parents were passing through town, went out to a yummy breakfast, the girls enjoyed getting to know their grandparents, and then off we headed to a few wonderful places...

Payless...

Ross...

and a lovely second-hand store - Twice Upon A Time

What did we buy there? Pure joy :)

Dancing shoes, tights, baby dolls, and dance recital outfits/tutus!!!!

Katya had been asking for dance shoes since her arrival and last night kissed the book, Angelina Ballerina. She told me that she dreams about dancing in her sleep. And I must say, the girl has got some rhythm! So today we decided it was time to spoil them a bit :) And it was so fun!!!

All three girls ran into the house, changed clothes, and then I surprised them with pushing all the furniture away from the living area (which has wood floors) and putting on The Nutcracker, an original version filmed in St. Petersburg. They danced their little hearts out and delighted in showing me their impressive moves, spins, and splits (Nastya can go from standing to a complete split on the floor in .2 seconds - amazing flexibility)!!! After that they watched a movie and the boys rested while I had some nice quiet time with the Lord - what a lifeline and refreshment that is for me. So great to just thank Him for what He is doing and to continue to go before Him for strength and wisdom. It goes without saying that I could not walk this journey apart from the Lord nor could I experience the joy as I walk it.

Then Katya asked me to type the info written on the back of her favorite movie into the computer so that it could be translated into Russian. She then wrote every word down into her journal. She then looked at the English words on the back of the movie, compared to what I had typed, and realized that I had summarized on the computer, leaving out a bit (it was really long)! Can't get anything past this girl!!

To top off this fun day, my parents and my sister all came for dinner, bringing dinner with them!! Thanks guys!! We cooked hamburgers and hotdogs and the girls repeated the dance performance for everyone. The boys got involved this time, pretending to be the mice in the play. To cute! Things got a little crazy when Jadon suggested that he tie a rope around Ben and pull him up from the second story balcony so that he could fly. Things had to stop there :) So maybe we're all a bit crazy but we are having a blast!!!

Another amazing blessing - when we went to the pool yesterday at our neighborhood park, we walked up and who was there but Liliya!!! Liliya is a Ukrainian woman who has lived in the US for 10 years. She is too sweet and wants to help us by translating, teaching the girls English, and just supporting them and us!! Who but God could have placed her at the entrance to the pool when we were walking in!!! We met her at Christmas when Nastya was here but I didn't really know if she would want me to call her. And guess what she used to do in Ukraine?!? Teach kids English!!!

What better way could I imagine spending this time? Laying on a beach maybe? That sounds fun but, truly, despite the fact that the struggles are very real and difficult, the joy intertwined is so sweet that I wouldn't trade it for anything.

Here's a video of the recital - Allee is in pink Katya blue, and Nastya is helping Ben.

Vow!

2008-08-15T10:12:00.000-07:00

I couldn't decide on how to start this update. First, sorry for the silence!!! We have been crazy busy in a whirlwind of unexpected events, a plethora of emotions, excitements, challenges, and continuous cooking, eating and cleaning. Keep reading :)

I want to be honest about things here. So I will start out with the challenges and then move onto how our Lord has met us at each challenge. In the last six days:

Nastya and Katya arrived in the middle of the night

We have kept my three year old niece who was starting to really miss her mommy and needing lots of comfort

Zach's grandfather died and he and Allee left town for a few days

N&K had their first dentist appt which they were very very fearful about

I went to Target with the girls (big mistake, enough said)

Nastya came down with an ear infection and we had to get anitbiotics (another dreaded doctor visit with six kids)

Some 'testing of the waters' on the part of Katya's attitude and behavoir and certainly a fearfulness of not being accepted/loved

My parents and my sis arrived in the Austin airport without my brother in law and new nephew b/c Bennet's visas issues were not resolved in time for them all to come home together, so they were all frustrated and sad about that and of course extremely tired and a bit sick.

Besides the normal work of cooking cleaning, buying endless fruit as it disappears instantly upon arrival, and caring for basic needs, I think that about covers the past few days

Oh, the day after the girls arrived I lost my special watch that was from my grandmother before she died, my wedding ring and my Aggie ring

Okay, but here are the really amazing parts. I want you to know that I write about all this above only so that it can show how God is so good and His grace is sufficient even when times are very difficult, including minute details:

The arrival was amazing and I really didn't feel all that tired the next few days.

Ella was a sweetheart and had the sweetest reunion with her mommy at the airport AND our sweet friend Becca kept the other kids while I went to the airport to pick them up because it is such a far way and they have been getting car sick. It was great to have a little time on the way home to hear about the highlights of Ethiopia and see pics on the camera and hear all about Bennet Toufiq.

Zach and Allee had a nice time together enroute to the funeral, which was really nice and truly honored the life of his grandad. AND I stayed at my parents' house that night with the kids and everyone went to sleep by 8:00 including my parents and it was so wonderful to have some extended quiet time alone with the Lord. Thank you to those of you who were praying specifically for that.

The dentist was SO kind and gentle and would you believe it - they actually said that they kind of liked it!!! They left all smiles :) (The good news is that Katya has pretty good teeth with only a few cavities but the bad new is that Nastya has some really serious issues and they won't be able save some baby teeth, but long term it will be okay)

Target, well....let's just say that we left alive and without Bratz dolls but with a cute new pair of sunglasses, goggles for swimming, new shoes, a few other small goodies, and some food...only minimal pouting about the many "no's"

Our kind doctor (also a family friend) prescribed antibiotics without us coming to see him and the ear is much better - Thank you Dr. Nelson!!!

My sister's baby boy finally got the visa paperwork fixed and they have an appt at the US Embassy in Ethiopia on Monday - Jason and Bennet Toufiq will be home Wednesday assuming all goes well

AND I found my watch and rings!!! - a kind person had put it up after I forgot it at my parents' house one day and I didn't get the message about where it was until much later

As far as the girls, they LOVE swimming and want to "kupatseeya park, please Momma" (swim at the park) every day. Katya LOVES to sing and dance - just as Nastya told us - and has asked countless times to go get dancing shoes and a leotard and to have dance lessons. We have not had a chance yet to get the shoes, and I kind of want to surprise her too. She is very sensitive - in a sweet way - and wants love and affection so very much. She gives the greatest hugs of all time and enjoys reading and drawing as well. She is a bit more shy in personality that Nastya (who will jump off a cliff if it we tell her it can be done :)), but certainly is trying very hard to learn English. She was so excited when I showed her a book that is written in Russian that I bought for her.

Nastya is doing great - she is a little bundle of energy and joy and is ready to pull a prank on you too! She LOVES horses and even kisses the pictures that Allee has of them. She can't wait to ride again. She seems much more comfortable with us than before and we really have not had any struggles so far on this trip.

All in all, things are going well. It was a hard few days but honestly I could feel the grace of God sustaining us and the past two days were such a blessing. God is so gracious to us. We had a wonderful time with the girls today and they are such an incredible joy to have here. I just look at them and am filled with wonder that they are here and at all God is doing in their lives and ours.

More later...

SUBMITTED!

2008-08-10T11:51:00.000-07:00

What an amazing few days - and now we find this email below today.

Hi there,

I'm very glad for the girls and for you!!! Good news! CONGRATS!!
I have successfully submitted the dossier on Thursday so there is no any problems at all. Soon we will know the date. I hope to meet you soon.
Take care and have good time there,
Love,
N

We had a wonderful time at church this morning and the girls loved the worship although they were bored but quiet during the sermon. I was trying to imagine sitting in a Ukrainian church service and not understanding a word.

The Lord of hosts has sworn saying, "Surely, just as I have intended so it has happened, and just as I have planned so it will stand." Isaiah 14:24

What an amazing gift!

2008-08-09T19:13:00.000-07:00

We had the most precious reunion last night at the airport! It was everything I imagined and more! We got the greatest hugs of all time and huge smiles as we walked out to our car about midnight. Thank you so much to our paparazzi crew who captured those sweet moments! Then we drove about an hour and half home with one stop to get bananas... I think since last night they have each had about 8 pieces of fruit. They are like kids in a candy shop with the fruit - they are amazed that I allow them to have it. I figure its good for them and it will taper off eventually. At least it kind of started to at Christmas with Nastya.

Anyways, so we arrived home and met each and every animal (we kind of have a zoo!). Then they wanted to take a bath (and needed one - they showed up in several layers including sweaters?!? - this is Texas in August and I don't think it is cold in Ukraine either!!). Finally we put on their pjs and we prayed and went to sleep about 3 in the morning. Wow! They slept until 8 and then up we went, cooked breakfast (eggs, little sausages, bread) which they ate well, cleaned up (Katya really likes to help clean and is very organized), got dressed and headed to my parents' house to swim and meet the horses. Oh, before we left Zach and Katya played around on the computer listening to music. She loves music and we had sent her the Breakaway CD (praise and worship music) and a cd player for her birthday. She recognized all the songs and seems to really enjoy them. We had fun looking at pictures too.

So we arrived at my parents and I finally let them unbuckle and roll down the windows once we got into the gate. They were in awe of the sunroof and stuck their heads out. It was amazing to see Nastya's reactions at seeing things again and Katya's reactions at seeing everything for the first time. The funniest reaction was when Nastya saw Solomon - my parents' huge New Foundland who was a tiny puppy at Christmas - she was so confused at how he had grown SO big :) Another example, Nastya knew the seat belt is a non-negotiable but Katya is learning that (just like Nastya did at Christmas). I watched Nastya ride her bike, pet the horses, and swing under the trees today and remembered the emotions of the last day in January that she relished doing these exact things and neither of knew if she would ever be back to do it again. Thank you Lord for bringing these children to us!

Swimming Time!!

We headed to the pool and they have been telling me that they know how to swim. Just before getting in they asked for life jackets!! I had none except for Ben and Ella's - much to small! They said they knew how!! So they squeezed into these mini life jackets and tentatively got in, holding onto me for dear life. Very soon though, they were flopping around, holding their breath underwater, and attempting a few strokes. It won't take them long to learn, but we will have life jackets that fit next time around!!

After all that we ate lunch, went up to the house to rest a bit with a movie, and fit in a little bike riding. Katya is a bit frustrated that her little sis can ride and she can't. It was too hot to practice long today but she will get it soon.

Katya is so incredibly sweet and thoughtful. She really likes Ella and braided her hair so pretty today. She is very helpful and notices when things need to be done. She is very friendly and likes to be with us all the time. She is also calm and I think has a calming effect on Nastya :) She is doing great with English too - it is fun to teach them English.

I go to bed tired but full of joy!

What a gift it is to have these precious girls.

A few hours...

2008-08-08T15:07:00.000-07:00

And we will hug our girls!!! They arrive late tonight. We are taking the kids to dinner and maybe a movie while we wait for the plane to arrive!! We talked to them when they got to NY and can't wait to hold them and see them.

It is surreal after all the uncertaintity. When we put Nastya on a plane eight months ago we had no idea if we would see her again but dared to hope... And now here they come!!!

Well Said

2008-08-07T11:18:00.000-07:00

Here is an article written by Stephen Curtis Chapman. I saw it on another blog and wanted to share it.

FRANKLIN, Tennessee (CNN) -- According to UNICEF, there are 143 million children in the world who have lost one or both parents.
In America alone, there are half a million children in foster care, and approximately 120,000 of these children are waiting to be adopted. In many countries, children are too often orphaned or abandoned because of poverty, disabilities and disease; every 15 seconds, a child loses a parent because of AIDS. These are staggering facts that can seem overwhelming and discouraging, but I believe that God has a loving plan for each child, and that plan is you and me.
Caring for these children is not the job of governments or institutions; instead, it is the job of families, people and communities. As Christians, our compassion is simply a response to the love that God has already shown us. Mother Teresa would constantly remind those who worked with her that the Bible clearly teaches that whatever we do for the least of these, we do for Jesus. So in a very real sense, caring for orphans is a chance to meet the person of Jesus in "the guise of human suffering." This is an invitation from the heart of God to know him and to experience his love.
Nine years ago, my wife and my eldest daughter, Emily, traveled to Haiti on a mission trip. Having been exposed to extreme poverty for the first time, Emily returned home with a determined passion to make a difference in the lives of at-risk children.
Only 12 years old, Emily went on an all-out campaign to persuade us to adopt. She bought a book on international adoption with her Christmas money and would read it to us regularly. She began fervently praying and writing letters to Mary Beth and me, encouraging us to consider giving a waiting child a home. Emily knew God was leading us in the direction of adoption; however, Mary Beth and I were not yet convinced.
My wife and I had always supported the idea of adoption, and as Christians, we understood the importance of loving and caring for others. But what I had not yet grasped was that adoption is a physical picture of what Jesus has done for me. I did nothing to deserve God's love; in fact, I was living as an orphan, without hope. Yet God chose to pursue a relationship with me, and through the death of his son Jesus, I was adopted into God's family.
My wife and I began moving toward adoption with fear and trembling and asking all the questions people ask. I remember Mary Beth crying herself to sleep at night saying, "What are we doing? I can't do this." However, God kept reassuring us that this was the direction he was leading us. It was a huge journey of faith for us.
In May of 2000, we found ourselves in a hotel room in China's Hunan province, welcoming the newest member of our family, Shaohannah Hope. From that moment, we began our journey into the world of adoption, orphan care and Shaohannah's Hope.
We went on to adopt Stevey Joy and Maria. Recently, our youngest daughter, Maria, passed from life on this earth and is now safely in the arms of Jesus. We have been completely overwhelmed by the love and support of so many during this time of deep, deep sadness. Through all that we've experienced, one thing we still know is true: God's heart is for the orphan.
In our travels to Latin America, Africa and Asia, we have visited many different orphanages. If you look past the surroundings and into the eyes of the children, they all have the same look. They seem to convey, "I don't think this is what I was made for. Where do I belong?"
These children are crying out for the hope of a family, for the hope of community, for the hope of a permanent love. Our mission, and the mission of our adoption charity, Shaohannah's Hope, is to show hope to these children and to mobilize people, families and communities to be living examples of God's love for them.
We started Shaohannah's Hope in order to connect willing families with waiting children, but the reality is that there are many orphans who cannot be adopted. Even though we may not be able to bring them into our homes, we still have the opportunity to show them the hope we have.
If only 7 percent of the 2 billion Christians in the world would care for a single orphan in distress, there would effectively be no more orphans. If everybody would be willing to simply do something to care for one of these precious treasures, I think we would be amazed by just how much we could change the world.
We can each do something, whether it is donating, adopting, fostering, mentoring, visiting orphans or supporting families that have taken in orphans. You can change the world for an orphan.

Coming To America!!!

2008-08-04T08:07:00.000-07:00

They got the visas! They got the visas!!! Woo-hoo!! Thank you Lord!!

I can't describe the relief and excitement I feel!!! We will see our girls in less than five days!!!

BIG Week!

2008-08-01T07:02:00.000-07:00

Saturday August 2nd - My sis, brother-in-law, and my parents board a plane to leave for Ethiopia to bring home little Bennet Toufiq. We will be keeping their three year-old daughter Ella while they are gone. What is even more fun about this is that we are staying at my parents house the first five days they are gone and we will be swimming every day! Yeah for something for the kids to do to burn off their endless energy in this incredible hot weather that has been keeping them indoors!!!

Monday August 4th - (this will really be the middle of the night on Sunday for those of us in the US) The critical visa appointment takes place in Kiev that will determine whether the kid are coming on the hosting trip. We are praying that there are NO complications.

Thursday August 7th - We move back to our house with Ella to get last minute stuff ready for the girls and to make a BIG grocery trip. Edit: I just realized I forgot to include that this was also the BIG day that our dossier gets submitted!!! I clearly need sleep :)

Friday August 8th - Our sweet girls are scheduled to arrive late at night. They will be tired but we cannot WAIT to have them here. Everything's ready for them!

Wednesday August 13th - Bennett comes home - party at the airport!!! This morning is also the girls first dentist appointment.

Even with all this - I think it will be less stressful than this past week has been - at least a really fun version :) This past week has been tough - I have been trying to get a ton of work done in the office and getting lots of things checked off the list to prepare for all this. I've just felt overwhelmed in many ways trying to accomplish quite a bit. So I am glad the prep time is just about over :)

UPDATE AND URGENT PRAYER REQUEST:

Since I first typed this post, my sis had a snag in her process. They are still going to Ethiopia tomorrow - thank the Lord, but there is a chance there could be a problem with their immigration paperwork. Basically a typo was made by CIS about the age of the child they are adopting. It must be changed and the paperwork must arrive in Addis Ababa before Wed. or they will be stuck waiting on a visa and delay their return. Pray that God works out the details!!! There is already a senator on it but the timing will be close at best.

God of Provision!

2008-07-30T19:40:00.000-07:00

I am so incredibly thankful that the much needed dental work that the girls need is being provided! I finally talked with our wonderful dentist today. She saw Nastya in December but it was so close to her leaving that there was not time to tackle the problems. I have been so concerned about both their teeth - although they do look better in pictures now that they has been following my instructions and brushing! What good girls :) But there are some very serious cavities that must be causing pain although Nastya said they didn't. And we don't know what to expect with Katya's teeth yet, except that Nastya told us that Katya had a few pulled! Not a great sign!

We have been praying about how we might get some of the most pressing things addressed while they come for the hosting trip. The biggest hurdle has been the finances. As my sis and I were discussing today - during the adoption process money is like water through the fingers! So I really felt that I needed to ask our dentist - whom I have seen since I was a teenager. I was worried that because we know her so well that she would feel obligated and that is the last thing I wanted. So, I explained to her the situation and told her to please not feel that she had to say yes and that if she can't (she is semi-retired with lots of grand babies) to just recommend who else I could talk to. She kind of laughed at me and told me I was silly for being nervous to ask her and that she would LOVE to do their dental work at no cost! We set up an appointment for their first cleaning, x-rays, and an exam to plan what needed to be done next.

I am so humbled by her generosity. We have not had to ask for help financially before from outside our family. It is an awesome thing. I am so blessed and humbled to be able to recieve this gift. Granted it is for the girls but since we plan to adopt them - I am asking for help for my children. And I think God is teaching me something here.

You see - this is big. Much bigger than us. We cannot do this ourselves. Of course not. "You can do nothing apart from Me..."

But I mean we cannot adopt these children and raise them without the help of other people as well. God will use and already has used MANY other people to minister to these children. Of course this is so true in the lives of all our children but I guess the enormity of the task right now - finances, length of travel and childcare while we are gone, supporting and loving the girls and us as we walk the ups and down of the road before us, medical care, just feeding and clothing five children in general, etc, etc...just makes it crystal clear that we need help. Even more crystal clear that while the Lord clearly provided the adoption money - times are otherwise a bit tight right now.

God will use others in this journey and it will be their blessing and ours.

Thank you to all you love and support us through this - through prayer, encouragement, advice, physical help, and finances. We are richly blessed.

2 Corinthians 9:8-15

And God is able to make all grace abound toward you, that you, always having all sufficiency in all things, may have an abundance for every good work. 9 As it is written: "He has dispersed abroad, He has given to the poor; His righteousness endures forever." Now may He who supplies seed to the sower, and bread for food, supply and multiply the seed you have sown and increase the fruits of your righteousness, while you are enriched in everything for all liberality, which causes thanksgiving through us to God. For the administration of this service not only supplies the needs of the saints, but also is abounding through many thanksgivings to God, while, through the proof of this ministry, they glorify God for the obedience of your confession to the gospel of Christ, and for your liberal sharing with them and all men, and by their prayer for you, who long for you because of the exceeding grace of God in you. Thanks be to God for His indescribable gift!

Books

2008-07-28T16:06:00.000-07:00

I just started reading The Connected Child by Dr. Karyn Purvis. Zach and I are finding it to be a worthwhile read. We are only in the first 25 pages or so, but out of many books that I have ordered - this one just seems to make sense. I agree with many of the views expressed so far and appreciate the compassionate viewpoint that is offered. Anyways, we've ordered several adoption books and most we never read past the first few pages because they've been on the negative side and very technical. At some point maybe we'll find them helpful but not for now.

My favorite have been biographical stories of adoptions but The Connected Child is the first 'helpful' book that I've wanted to recommend. As far as the biographical ones - here is a list of a few faves: The Strength of Mercy by Jan Beazley, Finding Home by Jim Daly, Castaway Kid by R.B. Mitchell(this one is autobiographical by an adoptee - very insightful), and Saving Levi by Lisa Bentley.

Anyways, I'll post another update when we are further through it.

Getting Closer!!

2008-07-20T20:00:00.001-07:00

We are counting down to the hosting trip - just three more weeks. Its funny because on one hand we have ton of things going on right now and I feel that I need as much time as possible to get all caught up on everything and prepared for them coming, but on the other, much bigger hand time seems to be dragging so very slowly as we wait to see them.

Last night as Zach I were talking about the girls, I finally allowed myself to get REALLY excited about seeing them :). I realized that I've really been holding back because I've been very concerned with all the changes in plans this summer that the group may not get visas. But as it is so close and the person in charge of the trip assures us that the visas will go through, we are fully in prep mode and high anticipation.

So, I can't wait see them come off that plane and have a much longed for reunion with Nastya and to finally meet Katya, although it seems I know her already. To hold them, to play a slightly different version of UNO with them, to see how Nastya has grown, to tuck them into the beds I am getting ready, to pray for them with them in our home rather than across the world, to feed them as much fruit and veges as they can hold, to see if they really can swim (they say they can :)), to teach Katya to ride a bike, to see if Nastya still remembers how, to cuddle, to ride horses, to see them delight in simple things, to be able to practice my broken Ukrainian and see them crack up at my attempts! I can't wait!

I am making meal plans, lists of fun things we might want to do, installing a program to help them learn English on the computer, and most fun - getting the things together that they will need. Tonight we began setting up a second twin bed in the extra room. I got the box out of the attic with all Allee's clothes from last summer and some even smaller than that. At Christmas Nastya was at best a size 7 so I need a few more things in that size. I don't really know how big Katya is but I am guessing around a 10, which would be perfect because Allee's old clothes is mostly 10s and I have lots of that. If she's bigger she can share with Allee. I think overall we are pretty set! The only thing I'm really not sure of is shoe size.

My sweet Allee helped me with the room and was so excited to imagine them enjoying the new bedspreads and clothes and had to bring in a purse for each of them filled with some lip glosses and a few pieces of jewelry that she wanted them to have. She also insisted that Nastya have one of her Breyer horses, since she was so in love with horses at Christmas. She has such a giving, thoughtful spirit - it is fun to plan together!

And to make things even more exciting, my sis just recently got news that she is traveling to Ethiopia just a few days before the girls arrive to bring home her baby boy!!! They have been waiting quite awhile and we can't wait to meet him. So while she and her husband are gone for 11 days, I get to care for my three year old neice.

So that's right - I'll have SIX children for a while - three that I'm not all that familiar with! And honestly - I can't wait!!! Not too bad for a girl who babysat once in high school and decided she wasn't all that much of a kid person. Who would've thunk it?!? Only God could have changed all that :) And I'm so glad!

Private Blog

2008-07-16T18:44:00.001-07:00

Sorry about the confusion with the private blog. I got a little paranoid about the agency that we first hosted with trying to find our blog. It's a long story but I have been assured that they have no power to do anything to cause us any problems and I honestly can't imagine why they would.

I don't mind if tons of people that I don't know read our blog because if it can be an encouragement to anyone as so many of your blogs have been to me, then I am humbled. God used blogs of others - especially Kristina's story (thanks Leslie!) - during the time that He first began to move our hearts toward older child adoption/hosting.

So for many reasons (to share with others who desire to share this journey and because it is a huge source of encouragment for us to have all of you readers sharing with us and praying for us and the girls) I am leaving it open.

As I've mentioned before, we were with an agency at first (when we first hosted) who proved to be quite dishonest to us and mostly to several friends who hosted with us. It's a long story but we are somewhat concerned that they are not very happy that we decided not to use them to adopt. Now, for the record, just because you host with an agency you are in no way obligated to use them for your adoption. But, a few things lately have made us concerned that they could try to cause problems for us either by trying to take us off the list at the SDA to submit our dossier or even by directly causing difficulties through the people at the girls' orphanage.

Our facilitator, whom we completely trust and are so thankful to have, assures us that this cannot be done. And it seems unlikely that they would waste their time with nothing to gain. And even more unlikely that they would come looking for my blog. And even if they did, we are not hiding anything.

If you are reading this, please pray for protection from any who would seek to cause problems. It is beyond my comprehension to imagine why anyone would want to cause problems. They stand to gain nothing but yet seem vindictive - and when they were the ones who were in the wrong. If these people had a reputation of honesty we would have gladly utilized their services to adopt.

I do know that despite my concerns and the anxiety that sometimes grips me regarding the possiblities, God is so much bigger than any of this. I am trusting that He can overcome any evil plans that may or may not exist. I think sometimes I may be overly imaginative to think that these are possiblities, but whether these are real concerns or not, I must lay it before the Lord.

I read and prayed about the verses below this morning and know that worry only causes harm. These verse gave me great peace. Pray that I will remain in that place of resting and trusting in Him. Pray that I will only allow these concerns to push me to pray more and trust more but that I will truly rest in the Lord.

Psalm 37

Do not fret because of evildoers,
Nor be envious of the workers of iniquity.
2For they shall soon be cut down like the grass,
And wither as the green herb.

3Trust in the LORD, and do good;
Dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness.
4Delight yourself also in the LORD,
And He shall give you the desires of your heart.

5Commit your way to the LORD,
Trust also in Him,
And He shall bring it to pass.
6He shall bring forth your righteousness as the light,
And your justice as the noonday.

7Rest in the LORD, and wait patiently for Him;
Do not fret because of him who prospers in his way,
Because of the man who brings wicked schemes to pass.
8Cease from anger, and forsake wrath;
Do not fret--it only causes harm.

August 7th, 2008

2008-07-07T18:12:00.000-07:00

I knew it was going to happen soon. I've been almost obsessive about checking my email, as my family can attest to. But we'll get back to the good news...

I knew at any moment I could have an email with a date. A date we've been hoping and praying for since Christmas. And although we have had reason to hope it would be soon, in the back of my mind, I worried. I thought that maybe there would be a mistake and it wouldn't happen at all or at least not right now.

Well today as I checked my email for the hundredth time since I knew that the August list had been posted, I finally saw what I had been waiting for - an email titled "dossier submission"! We got the date that our dossier will be submitted to the SDA! We can't believe it is so soon - August 7th is amazing! And to make things even more amazing it is likely that we could receive an SDA appointment relatively quickly. My most optimistic guess WAS that we could be in Ukraine by November but it seems entirely possible that we could be there by October or maybe even September. I would LOVE to travel in September - I think the weather would be really nice and of course the sooner the better. The girls are still scheduled to be here for hosting from Aug 8th until Aug 31st, so it could be a short time for them to go home before we are there to adopt them. Of course whether we can be ready to travel and settle the things that need to be settled first could be another issue. The timing seems a little crazy with lots of things going on in our family and extended family, but clearly it is out of our control and we trust that God will provide what we all need.

Okay and if that wasn't enough good news, my dossier also arrived in Kiev today and my facilitator told me it looked really good! I'm so proud of all those papers!

So now it is time to finish a few thousand things we need to do before we go and get prepared for traveling for so long!!!

What an amazing day :)

On It's Way!!!

2008-06-30T20:37:00.000-07:00

Our dossier is in-transit and currently is in Paris, France!!! Almost there :)